Wednesday, April 4, 2012

HCwDB After Dark – Douche McDingle gots mad leg for ya, baby

This is where we get a leg up on the competition, gentle readers.

Some share booty.  We disseminate Mass Ass.

Because of your resounding showing in the comments section, we here at the well-greased machine that is the DarkSock Satellite Office feel that you have earned a precious nugget hidden away in the Pear Reserves, like a solid gold jet ski stashed in the Vatican vaults.

Behold – Hallowed Hall o’ Pear Legend AssPear LaPlante:   The Front Side Of The Moon!

# posted by Bagnonymous
3:02 pm April, 4 THEONETRUEDOUCHE said...

Douche McDingle does not understand that women are not impressed that you are offering to lap their nether regions like a St. Bernard, even if your cousin used an ice cube, a potato and your dad’s tie tack to pierce your tongue. Hot(?) Seems to have her uni-brow under control.

3:13 pm April, 4 hermit said...

I’d circumnavigate La Plante’s southern hemisphere like Ferdinand Magellan on shore leave.

3:15 pm April, 4 Ass-istant Manager said...

Not only does After Dark come on before Afternoon under DarkSock’s care, it comes oiled up and ready for work. Now that’s the type of leader I can get behind. DarkSock for HOH. Assuming he can tie his own shoes and the only time he watches the The Bachelor is when the TV got left on accidently and he glanced up between boning his lady, chopping wood and teaching poor kids to read.

3:33 pm April, 4 The Right Honorable Member for, The Very Reverend Mother Her Duchal Serene Highness, Dr, Hortense Sussudio Fuckerfaster said said...

holy fuck, i just figured it out!

asspear laplante is actually chelsea clinton.

and the real single 6 year joke that this site is based on is on rush limbaugh!

well and all of us who have spilled many a seed to chelsea clinton.

has science ever solved the problem of how to take back a wank session?

i think time travel, invisibility and cold fusion can all be solved if approached from the perspective of how to unjerkoff.

davinci’s coders.

4:04 pm April, 4 Bag A said...

DarkSock is killing me today!

4:15 pm April, 4 The Dude said...

I refuse to unjerkoff. I am a man who keeps my commitments.

4:29 pm April, 4 Medusa Oblongata said...

Why are the first two inches of his mohawk shaved to scalp level?

4:32 pm April, 4 Vin Douchal said...

I refuse to recommend my song “Ass Pear LaPlante” as that would be crass self promotion.

.

No. Nothing so brash as to put the cover to the Single [Explicit] right there in the open

.

<br.

.

No, that would just be a giant hand job.

.

.

.

Chops

4:48 pm April, 4 Et Tu Douche? said...

Dog Bless he of the ebony stocking for his work here today is nothing short of outstanding.

5:09 pm April, 4 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

I see glorioused assed Mulatto people. Funny thing about really big asses is you can’t tell your white friends about it and the brothas don’t believe you. Weel let me tell ya I have glorioused over some fine young fatties when I was young, cause I like me some strange and if bitch is chillin’ on my grunk and skunk and sporting me some good vibes and fetches my 40, then I’ll let her fine young shelf hold my frosty Canadian Lager while the game is on and lick her furiously between periods. And by between periods I mean hockey. Now if I can score a period on a fine young shelf as in between periods then I is kashilling mad yo’ daft punk.

.

Son. what the fuck you looking at homie?

5:12 pm April, 4 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

I put forward a motion that “Francine” be linked under “Ass Pear Laplante” in the music section at left a little bit below here. I hope she doesn’t have a cock between her big fat legs.

5:17 pm April, 4 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

All I try to do is write http://www.onionbooty.com

5:53 pm April, 4 Dude McCrudeshoes said...

I’ve got a torque wrench for that well oiled machine. And I’ve get a pillowcase filled with lead shot for McDingle.

5:58 pm April, 4 Vin Douchal said...

@ Rev

.

Yuck, two things I can’t take in my porno: uncircumscized coccks (no homo) and blacks (no racist) and I hurl when there is a combo of both.

.

Super Cumshot Amateur Sex over at xvideos.com is where it’s at lately. I swear I’ve seen half of these gals while floating around Fontana…. which is why I don’t float around Fontana… float, I says

.

.

I wish I’d run across Francine. I’d do the time if she said no.

7:25 pm April, 4 Nostradouchus said...

Mass Ass = Mass Photoshop = Mass Cottage Cheese

7:45 pm April, 4 The Right Honorable Member for, The Very Reverend Mother Her Duchal Serene Highness, Dr, Hortense Sussudio Fuckerfaster said said...

i literally just thought of something. asspear laplante needs a fan club. the name that came to mind was asspear’s aspies, but then i thought asspear’s asspies had a certain ring to it.

autistes.

8:09 pm April, 4 Sofa King said...

His tongue resembles a fetid slab of lunch meat that has spent too much time in the sun. It’s Sofa King disgusting.

11:15 pm April, 4 Jacques Doucheteau said...

I do love me some gymnast pear.

.

And a gymnast with a good floor routine.

11:41 pm April, 4 Jacques Doucheteau said...

I don’t get what some people’s aversion to uncircumcised cawk is. Circumcised isn’t necessarily much better.

12:13 am April, 5 Jacques Doucheteau said...

Something the Rev might appreciate.

4:01 am April, 5 DoucheyWallnuts said...

Human genitals should be felt, co-mingled, fellated and cunnilinged, but NEVER photographed or videoed up close and in hi-definition.

4:52 am April, 5 CB Popped said...

I have a Hawaiian gf with mass ass syndrome – she will be here in 10 days. Gonna help her with her affliction.

Talk about Circumnavigation Hermit.

4:55 am April, 5 Chris in 'Baghdad said...

Hard to tell where to begin with all of this, but I did find the photo of the junk-in-the-trunk Sista’s to be most enlightening. How many times have I been behind one of those trucks in the Wal-Mart wondering what they really look like under the hood? Well now I know. Gettin’ da edumacation on the ole HCwDB…who would guessed?

Have to say ole Ass Pear LaPlante looks as good from the front as she does from the posterior. Why would she be eating the world? If the Japanese could make a movie about Godzilla eating Tokyo they might be able to make one about Ass Pear LaPlante eating the world…one guy at a time…without all of those creepy Japanese porno squeaks and trills.

6:29 am April, 5 Dude McCrudeshoes said...

What’s with the slow loading bitmaps? Am I in some early ’90’s AOL alternate universe hell, or is D-Sock just fuccin’ with my mojo?

Leave a Reply