Monday, April 30, 2012

HCwDB of the Week: The Bishop and Homegrown Hannah

Just barely edging Oldbag Ralph and Dreamgirl Donna, The Bishop’s stupidhead and Homegrown Hannah’s homegrowns nanas were too tough a dialectic to ignore.

For what are we here if wherefore not to mock the choadal head and lust the perkage bobble?

Other ‘bags of note, the BvG named Marmoset and Sluthott Kelly from the Friday Haiku, Keyser Shmoeze’s Ladies of Perfect Leg, Moaz’s Stupid Hair and Stacey, Clown Hardy Gets Lucky, and Jesus Bling Boy.

Not a bad week, or should I say a ‘bag week. Get it? Because ‘bag sounds like ba-… okay nevermind.

I hereby decry that this week is ESOTERIC REFERENCE WEEK.

Every post will have an esoteric reference to something random. Wait, that was redundant.

Monchichi.

# posted by douchebag1
6:40 am April, 30 Et Tu Douche? said...

Mmmm….. Homegrown Hannah and by Homegrown Hannah I mean big, sloppy, bouncy, corn fed Midwestern farm raised fun bags.

6:41 am April, 30 Douche Wayne said...

The Bishop woke up one morning and asked himself, “How do I incorporate the gritty edge and understated rage of Henry Rollins with the approachability and cartoonish fashion sense of The Fresh Prince of Bel-Air? I’ve got it . . . ”

*breaks out clippers*

To celebrate her Weekly win, Hannah will jump up and down screeching like a contestant on The Price Is Right. Hopefully.

6:56 am April, 30 Nancy Dreuche said...

A Boggle themed hair do would have landed an even hotter hott. Just sayin’.

7:29 am April, 30 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

In the often misunderstood mathematics of Walrusian General Equilibria, it has often been noted that the individual utility of all players in the economy, whether they be suppliers or consumers of goods results in a common equilibrium where the general welfare of individuals and governments. This meaning that she should show us her boobs and we will thank her.

.

Freidmans

7:38 am April, 30 Dude McCrudeshoes said...

Purina puppy chow logo held on with a chinstrap. It’s too sad to be funny. Then there is Hanna’s melons fitting jigsaw puzzle like into Bishops sunken chest area, just above his buddha belly, like some dystrophic yin-yang.

7:38 am April, 30 Mr. Scrotato Head said...

Checkered crab

7:41 am April, 30 Dude McCrudeshoes said...

Bro-thello

7:46 am April, 30 I R A Darth Aggie said...

Awesome boobage! A pity she doesn’t stand a chance against Sleepy Slouching Slurping McDoucheTatBag of Clan McDouche…

7:52 am April, 30 SonnyChibaChoad said...

Maybe he’s a Chicago Cop of Croatian descent who got his Crim Justice degree from U Maryland College park.

8:02 am April, 30 Choad the Douche Sprocket said...

Her boobs are so big, even Frau Maruro’s Highlands are impressed.

8:04 am April, 30 Choad the Douche Sprocket said...

…that would be Frau Mauro — she of the huge Highlands.

Just ask Shepard and Mitchell.

8:17 am April, 30 Dude McCrudeshoes said...

I bet her nipples are the size of satellite dishes.

8:22 am April, 30 Douche Wayne said...

Connect Fung

8:23 am April, 30 Douche Wayne said...

Tic-Tac-Dope

8:43 am April, 30 Dr. Bunsen HoneyDouche said...

If he could get those squares to blink in alternate and complimentary colors (red/green, orange/blue, yellow/purple) that would be off the fuccen chain yo! I never joke and don’t ever call me Shirley.

8:44 am April, 30 Dr. Bunsen HoneyDouche said...

Does anyone else think his checkerboard looks a little like someone tried to cut it into the shape of Texas or is it just me?

8:45 am April, 30 Dr. Bunsen HoneyDouche said...

@ Et Tu

.

You’re on man! Ich liebe Bayern!

8:45 am April, 30 Dr. Bunsen HoneyDouche said...

This is my new method of avoiding finals week grading. Seems to be working. Well feed me nails and call my rusty!

8:53 am April, 30 Douche Wayne said...

I respectfully submit “Monchichi” is not as random as one would think. When compared to Homegrown Hannah:

1) Brunette? Check.

2) Adorable? Check.

3) Smiling brown eyes? Check.

4) Soft, nuzzle-inducing chest covered by white cloth? Check.

5) Mouth like a sex doll? Check.

After all, “Monchichi” means “happiness.”

9:09 am April, 30 Vin Douchal said...

That squareboard looks like the digitized blocker they use on “Cops” when they know they’ll get sued if the brand name appears. No need to call Xanax’s lawyers, it’s been handled

9:10 am April, 30 troy tempest said...

he is poo. You could do shakespeare from her balcony.

9:22 am April, 30 Et Tu Douche? said...

@Doc

The Manchester Derby is later this afternoon, lot a hype surrounding it too.

.

I could care less about Chelsea but Didier Drogba will be fun to watch.

11:54 am April, 30 Douchble Helix said...

Archie Andrews of Riverdale High:

.

http://images.quizilla.com/E/emilyr16/1053311927_uresarchie.jpg

2:14 pm April, 30 DoucheyWallnuts said...

His haircut is a tribute to his favorite show tune, “One Night in Bangcock.”

9:06 pm April, 30 Medusa Oblongata said...

Without prompting or assistance I can still sing the Monchici jingle from circa 1983. No lie. Cannot tell you my phone number or what I had for breakfast this morning, but I can sing 30-year old commercial jingles without missing a beat. I’m like an idiot savant, extra heavy on the idiot.

9:27 pm April, 30 Medusa Oblongata said...

Speaking of thirty year old songs, I’ll take that bait, Douchey Wallnuts:

“One night in Vegas makes the douchebag fumble

from all the Grey Gooses and ecstasy

One night in Vegas and the bros all tumble

into bed with bleethy company

I can feel the lip herp creeping up on me

Vegas, shitty poolside setting

and the swimmers don’t know what the swimmers are getting

the creme de la crap of the club scene

in a show with everything but no thinking

Time flies, doesn’t seem a minute

since the locker room had all the bros there in it

all change, don’t be dressing for the swimming,

going to Rehab, it’s no ordinary venue

It’s a cesspool, a disease pond, a wasteland, or, a shit place!

One night in Vegas, need a stupid haircut

cannot impress the Bleeths without it, see?

Well’ shave a chessboard from your top to temples

and if you’re lucky the soul patch is free

I can feel a stripper sliding up to me

*flute solo*

This town is really like no other

when you’re picking the scabs off your ballsack, brother

(It’s a drag, it’s a pain, it’s really such a pity, to be looking up and down, for a clinic in the city)

Whaddaya mean? Not one shot of penicillin in this stinking town?

Cheap girls, orange and bleeth, orange and bleeth

wanna party with us in the Bellagio suite

“Get some!” You’re talking to a tourist whose stupidity is among the purest. I get my kicks on the coke line, sunshine

…allright, that’s enough.

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