Tuesday, May 22, 2012

Steve…

Steve… Steve…

Eat… gym… eat… gym… eat… gym… douche…

Steve… Steve…

Corona Hott!

Crotch itch!… dented car!… emotional confusion!… screaming fights at 2am!… Steve! Steve!

Yeah, I really need to get out more.

# posted by douchebag1
9:53 am May, 22 Popsicle Stand said...

Okay, first and foremost they are standing in front of one of those kickass jumpy houses that my Parents were too jewish (Respect) to ever rent out for me. Second and secondly, if this boobs with the boobs doesn’t boobs into the HOH I’m gonna have to have my friends at the Health Dept. declare this place a Fire Island Hazard. I mean c’mon already. I’m gonna have to change my name to Jazz Hands if this keeps up.

9:57 am May, 22 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

Her pooch is gassy

Since the gyroscope was put

In her Monkey Hole.

9:58 am May, 22 Franklyn DealorNo Doucheifelt said...

Is this a first for tatted, swingin’ jebus bling? What on earth does tatted, swingin’ jebus bling connotate?? Well, Yeah, Douche, but what else?

9:59 am May, 22 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

My eyes go buggy

When the font changes from time

To time in my pants.

10:06 am May, 22 Capt. James T. Douche said...

Tatted Jeebus bling! Double douche points for you Steve!

10:21 am May, 22 Jim Beam said...

Let’s not get out of hand here – you can’t just put any tart in a shiny bikini in the HOH. She’s cute, but making the case for HOH means you cheapen the HOH experience – oh the sweet, sweet irony . . .

10:23 am May, 22 Vin Douchal said...

This is why I short out the parking structure elevator when I bring my boy to the mall playground, the stairs are right next to it:

.

10:23 am May, 22 Dude McCrudeshoes said...

Maybe he was laying on his side when the got that tatt? You know, faux gravity effect and all.

.

Must I write in italics forever more?

10:29 am May, 22 Dude McCrudeshoes said...

Steve, digging his finger painfully into Corona Hott’s ribcage. Later he’ll kick her in the mons veneris just to show how much he cares.

10:35 am May, 22 Popsicle Stand said...

@Jim Beam, great stuff, but seriously have you seen the HOH? That place is overrunneth by tarts in bikinis. When did the standards change? This didn’t used to be rocket science. Back in the old days the equation was a simple one Boobs + Bikini + Attractive Face = InstaHOH or InstaMamms if you follow this site on Facebook. I for one would like to know the new equation so if I stumble upon something during one of my wicked online bate seshes I can submit it here, you know, to help out and such. *cue halo*

10:37 am May, 22 Dude McCrudeshoes said...

That’s some serious belly pooch Corona Hott is sporting. I’d like to slap it with an electric eel then chase her up and down the beach with a live alligator snapping at her arse.

10:43 am May, 22 icame isaw idouched said...

Reminds me of the bygone halcyon days of abs and crab.

10:57 am May, 22 Capt. James T. Douche said...

Is it me or is she a bit soggy around the mid-section? I’m sure she’s tons of fun for a weekend of sexual debauchery and depravity but not HOH material, she’s standard issue Vegas pool hot nothing more, nothing less.

11:08 am May, 22 Popsicle Stand said...

Well I tried. Soggy midsection will get ya everytime. Tough crowd today.

11:15 am May, 22 FredN. said...

HOH? Jesus-bling-NO! That face is f’ed up.

11:28 am May, 22 Magnum Douche P.I. said...

There once was a quartasian with perfect round juggs

She dated a complete tool with a very punchable mugg

The drank the goose all day and all night

The douche banged her cooch with all of his might

But alas one day so sad was Ling Ming

For the bag was struck down by lightening for having tattoo Jesus bling.

.

.

.

.

Blasphemy

11:32 am May, 22 Douche Moore said...

Stair climber on the left FTW.

11:33 am May, 22 Douche Moore said...

As for Corona Hot’s pooch, have some respect, she’s carrying my next of kin.

11:42 am May, 22 Pooch Spackle said...

@Douche Moore, are her prenatal vitamins in that guy’s semen or are they in the Piña Colada she gonna shotgun after this pic is taken?

11:49 am May, 22 Stephanie said...

No,it’s more like this…Steve…tattoos…eat…gym…tanning bed…body oil…eat…protein bars…gym…tanning…look in the mirror…gym…eat…tan…look in the mirror…hair gel…gym…look in the mirror…tattoos…eat…body oil…tan…hair gel…you know the rest.

11:54 am May, 22 Nancy Dreuche said...

All of the avatar challenged or non-highlighted posters of late are me. Pooch Spackle, Popsicle Stand, Jim Beam, Michelle Obama’s Quivering Uterus, Fergie, and perhaps Mrs. Nuttersquirt.

12:03 pm May, 22 Pooch Spackle said...

Damnit me, you’re a genius.

12:04 pm May, 22 Magnum Douche P.I. said...

Nancy. can you be me or I be you. Wasn’t that a Replacements song ?

12:12 pm May, 22 DoucheyWallnuts said...

Steve is suffering from Micro Schmeckle Syndrome. Schmeckle, I says.

.

Also, I thought I was Pooch Spackle, Popsicle Stand, Jim Beam, Michelle Obama’s Quivering Uterus, Fergie, and perhaps Mrs. Nuttersquirt!?!

12:13 pm May, 22 Nancy Dreuche said...

In case any of you hatters like a good facebook hatter story. I know a dude who bought 200K worth at a predetermined premium price of $44 immediately after the IPO. He was trying to convince me to buy some before it rocketed to the $80 range within a week. I hat that fucker. Son.

12:35 pm May, 22 Dude McCrudeshoes said...

Facebook = failbook. The current losses are due simply to mismanagement of the IPO and some over-excitement about the valuation (about 10x the earnings ratio of Apple, who makes real products.) Wait until more people realize that nearly all of Failbook’s value is in it’s collected user data and how it’s used, misused, or abused. McCrude says shortsell, son.

12:37 pm May, 22 Dude McCrudeshoes said...

Fake Drueche outs real Drueche splinter personalities. Very who needs a bong hit when trippy shit like this is happening.

12:42 pm May, 22 Dude McCrudeshoes said...

Actually, I hope the SEC investigates Suckerberg and sentences him to a molten lead enema. Enema I says!

1:05 pm May, 22 Vin Douchal said...

My company has a huge presence on Facebook. Everytime I see one of our tech guys or an executive I tell them, “The only people making money with Facebook is Facebook”

.

Take that to the bank, fuckfaces

1:46 pm May, 22 Et Tu Douche? said...

I loves me some jigglies, thank Vin D.

1:48 pm May, 22 Magnum Douche P.I. said...

Facebook is a great internet platform

.

.

.

to post pictures of your cat

2:35 pm May, 22 Morbo said...

We’ve hit on the tatted-on Jesus bling. But WHAT in the holy blue hell is on his arm!?

Is that a lobster? A catfish? Aquaman slapping someone around with a sea bass for not paying protection money?

Who the hell gets a sea creature tattooed on their arm? Was it the end result of a drunken night in Portsmouth? A lost bet he had to make good on? Or just one of many ill-advised life choices he’s made?

I’m appalled by his doucheyness, but intrigued at its depth and depravity.

3:40 pm May, 22 Pooch Spackle said...

@McCrudeshoes 12:42p, you’re just jealous because he has a hot Asian wife.

4:02 pm May, 22 Dude McCrudeshoes said...

Let me correct that for you, pooch: he has an Asian wife.

4:58 pm May, 22 Dr. Bunsen HoneyDouche said...

@ Popsicle Stand

.

Mr White (wherever the fucck he went) and I will take up this challenge for an HOH formula once he resurfaces. Until then, I do some preliminary work and will report my findings later in a paper tentatively called “HOH entrance: Using Variations on A Markov Chain to Establish a Proper Boob to Pear Size Ratio in the Presence of Bikini Reveal”. Hey, if ya can’t dazzle ’em with brilliance…

5:01 pm May, 22 The Dude said...

First of all, I’m very scared of both people in this pic, for two very different sets of reasons, and B. ) Rev Chad poops Haiku like a damn fountain.

.

The Reverend Chad

Mastered the art of Haiku

Now he’s showing off

5:28 pm May, 22 CB Popped said...

I like her GSR, not his.

She is standing in the sun, no makeup, being Douched,,,she must look alot dif at night, and the shape of her jaw requires my fwapping cockk ropes.

5:29 pm May, 22 CB Popped said...

As per usual Vin, thanks for the creative tit postings.

5:33 pm May, 22 troy tempest said...

she’s carrying twins.

6:34 pm May, 22 Budo said...

Is it me or is there a higher than usual incidence of Asian hotts on the site lately? NOT THAT I’M COMPLAINING.

7:35 pm May, 22 Sofa King said...

Steve is in for a surprise when the starch bomb goes off and the hott turns into a hambeast.

7:43 pm May, 22 Stephanie said...

Oh,no,now you guys are going to compete looking for trampoline jumping girls with bouncing boobs.

9:42 pm May, 22 Guid is Good said...

Tattooed Jebus bling will never go out of style.

6:20 am May, 23 douche moore said...

“Oh,no,now you guys are going to compete looking for trampoline jumping girls with bouncing boobs.”

Actually, I was marveling at how well and quickly the girls navigated the difficult step obstacle while balancing an overfilled container of lemon water ice, without spilling a drop. Quite a feat of skill. Obviously, the one on the left demonstrated greater skills.

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