Thursday, June 21, 2012

Caption This Pic

“Now Kelly, why would I roofie your mai tai? My peen hasn’t worked since the Reagan years! And by Reagan years, I mean the last cycle of synthrol.”

# posted by douchebag1
11:58 am June, 21 alldouche said...

Hey sweetie, lets celebrate that I just got your face tattooed on my shoulder with one of Aunt Baroo’s favorite drinks!

12:08 pm June, 21 Et Tu Douche? said...

Sun glistened yogurt spackle landing area goes unnoticed as Ronaldo wants his color coordinated sippy drink back.

12:09 pm June, 21 Wheezer said...

“I think I saw the closing HTML tag in your drink.”

12:11 pm June, 21 Wheezer said...

It’s (literally) ‘Gay Hour’ at the Blue Oyster’s outdoor pool/lounge. Sally attends with her brother since she’s tired of being ogled every day.

12:13 pm June, 21 Wheezer said...

If only her left arm were dangling at her side…..

12:19 pm June, 21 Wheezer said...

She defines “hourglass.” There has to be a special Douchie created for her.

12:30 pm June, 21 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

This drink tastes funny. Did you lube your cock with Ozonol?

12:31 pm June, 21 Baron Von Goolo said...

Using your straw to hold the fetus at the bottom of the glass until it stops kicking can be challenging, but most agree it just adds to the experience of the Abortion Sunrise.

12:34 pm June, 21 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

He’s awful. She’s awesome. And by awesome I mean I pray that Mrs. Kroeger continues to get her figure from 20 years ago back. Cause that is it except three inches shorter. Let us pray.

.

And don’t get drunken stoned sunstroke before you brush your teeth in the late afternoon. Ozonol tastes like Ozonol.

.

Stroking Out

12:34 pm June, 21 Vin Douchal said...

Harry Connick Jr films the video to his new song , “Snurfles and Happy Trails , I Jizzed On Your Naval”

12:40 pm June, 21 Melvil_Duchi said...

our drinks match our outfits

12:44 pm June, 21 Franklyn DealorNo Doucheifelt said...

“No, No, you’re holding it wrong!

If you grab the base and don’t touch the straw you can pretend

its a big penis to die for and you can suck down his enormous wad!

Isn’t this fun?”

12:51 pm June, 21 Vin Douchal said...

Heeeey This is Mom’s!

1:18 pm June, 21 DarkSock said...

“What’s that between my shoulder blades…Dammit Lenny did you superman a ho again?”

1:19 pm June, 21 DarkSock said...

It took most of the afternoon, but Vinnie taught her how to suck AND swallow.

1:25 pm June, 21 DoucheyWallnuts said...

“Hey this glass is the same size and shape as the butt plug my boyfriend slamped up my ass last night! Drinks are on me and so is his load!”

1:27 pm June, 21 DoucheyWallnuts said...

“A rare photo of the douche/bleeth mating ritual in which Augie and Annette share a drink, forget each other’s names and engage in unprotected anal sex.”

1:27 pm June, 21 DoucheyWallnuts said...

BTW, Augie is giving us the Flabby Oblique Shave Reveal (FOSR).

1:42 pm June, 21 Capt. James T. Douche said...

This doesn’t taste like GHB?

1:49 pm June, 21 Magnum Douche P.I. said...

Baron V. G.: Wow, just wow on that comment. Not that there are any lines that could be crossed on this forum, but you may have just done it. Well done sir.

2:07 pm June, 21 Reverend Chad with Canadian Sunstroke said...

The Baron is always in character and jolly good dark humor. And on second look that hourglass chick has an extended Mons Pubis.

.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Vulva

.

Son

2:37 pm June, 21 troy tempest said...

BVG FTW

3:54 pm June, 21 Doucheywallnuts said...

The human vulva with natural pubic hair is fucking disgusting. Thank god for Brazil.

4:32 pm June, 21 Douche Moore said...

She is uber hot.

5:57 pm June, 21 Stephanie said...

“Here,drink this,and stand next to me.I have to convince my family I’m straight”

11:25 pm June, 21 Jacques Doucheteau said...

“Is that coconut cream at the bottom or…Oh no, you didn’t.”

11:43 pm June, 21 Jacques Doucheteau said...

@Doucheywallnuts

Don’t make me go off on another diatribe about the wonders of the female Rincón de la Vieja cloud jungle. Shaven pussy. Pshaw!

.

You can keep your barren psuedo-hymened toddler slit like the quasi pedobear you secretly are, while I continue to mow down on slopping wet meat-flapping labial mountains ringed with thick tufts of glorious pubic bush, with hair course and wirey like unbent paperclips. The farther your dick has to march through that Bataan musk forest to those swollen red piss pillows, the more you know you’re about to enter a real woman with yogic trained pelvic floor muscles that can milk the cum from your engorged ram rod with the strength and expertise of a champion arm wrestling Dutch dairy farmer with hands soaked in cocoa butter, sea urchin, and mint jelly.

.

No fucking shit.

11:45 pm June, 21 Jacques Doucheteau said...

My new band name: Abortion Sunrise

1:45 am June, 22 Dude McCrudeshoes said...

I will be back after I spend the next 16 hours watching Brazilian porn.

3:15 am June, 22 douche equis said...

Christ, another keyboard doused with snot and coffee. Thanks guys.

.

Kelly has a tummy and hips that make me say “My, Kelly, that’s quite a tummy and hips you have.” As to the bloke who said there should be an hourglass Douchie, we already have an “Hourglass” in the Hall of Hot and an “Hourglass Pear” in the Hall of Pear, so it might be a bit confusing — but I’ll say I’m all for it. Even though I have never quite gotten past the essential problem that houglass figure generally = large ass, I’m willing to stare at photo after photo until it no longer matters what I think, or even who I am.

4:02 am June, 22 DoucheyWallnuts said...

My new band name: Shave That Thang

4:03 am June, 22 DoucheyWallnuts said...

Going down on a vulva with natural pubic hair is like ordering a steak at a fine restaurant and having them bring out the bloody carcass of the steer. Bloody carcass, I says.

8:25 am June, 22 CB Popped said...

I dunno, mine tastes like semen too….

11:49 am June, 22 troy tempest said...

Bald pussy is boring – it’s all the same. However this is a bit extreme, IHMO.

Note: NSFW!!!!

http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/d/da/Female_unshaved_genitalia.jpg

I like it manicured, not bald. Here’s a map:

http://www.edenspathway.com/images/Brazilian-Wax-Style.jpg

I’ll take anything but the bald look or the “heart shaped” cut, which just looks retarded.

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