Thursday, June 7, 2012

Herpster Thursday

Today will be dedicated entirely to mocking the disturbing trend of douche-wear as hybridized with the urban hipster irono-pud.

It has gone from fringe HCwDB trend to full-blown epidemic.

And by full-blown, I mean coital bathroom wrongness.

And by epidemic, I mean permanently shmear-tainting the once lovely associations I drew between Hot Chicks and librarian glasses.

So sad when fantasies die under the withering light of Brooklyn-Silverlake coastal genetic cross splicing Brundlefly mutation.

# posted by douchebag1
6:21 am June, 7 DarkSock said...

Oh, it’s on like Donkey Dong, stepchile.

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Why is she wearing Plinky’s Mom’s clitoral hood piercing around her wrist?

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Speaking of long-running gags…Where the FUCK is Mr. White and Medusa? They must’ve locked themselves in the playpen again. Or the Laundry Gimp froze one of his tapered turds and shit-stabbed his way to Freedom.

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Again.

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Submissives.

6:21 am June, 7 DarkSock said...

His hair is more teased than Rush Limbaugh at a gay nude beach.

6:22 am June, 7 DarkSock said...

His hair is more teased than Kim Kardashian at a MENSA convention

6:23 am June, 7 DarkSock said...

His hair is more teased than Janeane Garofalo at a shaved pussy convention.

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Which I would like to attend.

6:24 am June, 7 DarkSock said...

His hair is more teased than Reverend Chad Kroeger at an AA meeting.

6:25 am June, 7 DarkSock said...

His hair is more teased than Wesley Snipes at an Albino Taxpayer’s convention

6:29 am June, 7 Capt. James T. Douche said...

Suddenly I want to punch John Stamos.

7:03 am June, 7 Anonymous said...

His dog tags are faker than Mitt Romney’s smile. Barry’s too.

7:04 am June, 7 Oh yeah, The Dude is remote said...

anonymousely

7:05 am June, 7 The Dude (remote loc) said...

At least she stole his watch.

7:06 am June, 7 The Dude (remote loc) said...

They look a bit short to be playing for the Miami Heat. No wonder those bitches lost.

7:11 am June, 7 Douche Wayne said...

This seems to be some type of intra-douchal irono-self-mockery.

Douche-on-Douche crime

7:29 am June, 7 ehcuodouche said...

Rivers Cuomo has corrupted our youth.

7:30 am June, 7 Douchble Helix said...

ESPN was on at a bar yesterday. Some jerk NBA player being interviewed had frames with no lens at all.

8:19 am June, 7 Vin Douchal said...

Douche above reading eye chart: “E, P C, Z …… Hey wait a minute that’s not a word ,… is this a trick question…?

8:50 am June, 7 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

True story.

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I was in the Ottawa Cancer Institute with my younger, lovely female cousin from the blow job on the golf green story early this week. She’s kind of depressed about getting the boobies cut off. Anyway her oncologist came around while I was visiting with interns following him around like herpster ducklings. The future of cancer treatment is in the hands of herpsters my friends. Shaggy, bearded, dirty looking, smelly, glasses wearing oncologists. Sweet fuck! If I get cancer, which I likely won’t cause the booze will get my organs first, I;m gettin on heroin to ease the pain as I go to the light of Ja and the only doctor I will allow near my decaying flesh will be Dr. Lenny The Box.

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Tumors

9:03 am June, 7 vin douche said...

Paula walnuts, the purple crayon chaser from MTV challenges

9:24 am June, 7 creature said...

his left arm is broken in 2 places…thus the pouty frown

9:40 am June, 7 Douche Moore said...

Mock librarian hotness makes me angry.

9:41 am June, 7 Douche Moore said...

Duck faces in unisen makes me angry.

9:42 am June, 7 Douche Moore said...

Dog tags on a non-military pud mixed with Jesus Bling makes me angry.

9:42 am June, 7 Douche Moore said...

I am concerned about my anger issues.

10:04 am June, 7 fatness said...

Your anger makes me angry.

11:15 am June, 7 Nancy Dreuche said...

As soon as it is considered popular and mainstream to be a hipster, that’s when they will cease to exist. You do not destroy the herpster by mocking him, you destroy him by mass producing him.

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Painful realities

11:32 am June, 7 Stephanie said...

You know,dogs tilt their heads like that when they’re trying to understand and pretend to be listening to you.

11:27 pm June, 7 Little Willie said...

She’s pointing where she wants you to stick your sausage in. The male companion has the intellectual capacity of an automaton and is just another mindless asshole.

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