Monday, June 25, 2012

Lime Johnson Says "Spike!"

The Leah Sisters, representing 70% of the under-25 indigenous female population in greater Ft. Lauderdale, giggle, pout, and go to Sizzler for lunch.

EDIT: There was a bug in the new spam filter that was deleting tons of comments, apologies for that. It should be fixed, give it a whirl, and drop an email to your humble narrator if problems persist.

# posted by douchebag1
2:10 pm June, 25 troy tempest said...

lime johnson fills me with a sense of disgust. Kind of like when those douchebags were sipping champagne and sneering at the protesters below. Same disgust, same urge, to cover them in parrafin and turn them into human candles.

The Chix?

Well, blondie on left has a 2 month old bun in the oven. She will name it Jason and raise it to be as douchie as its daddy.

Brunette in the middle doesn’t swallow or have orgasms. She’s really good at the treadmill.

And the skeezy blonde on the right looks like she used to do $40 blowies and then landed that gig as the weeknight bartender at the Fucking Pig and Ferkin, and now she does $50 blowies because she doesn’t need the money as much.

2:19 pm June, 25 Magnum Douche P.I. said...

This may be overstating the obvious, but Lime Johnson is a complete and utter tool.

2:21 pm June, 25 Vin Douchal said...

Greasy slimy slippery smears of oozing seborrhea. Not a pretty picture

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BTW the website continues to be farked up

2:48 pm June, 25 Morbo said...

Olivia Newton John hot in the pink bikini has self esteem issues. She’s smiling on the outside, but sad on the inside because, deep down, she knows this is as good as it’s gonna get — taking a picture with some jackass decked out in lime green, who won the Zack Ryder lookalike contest last time WWE was in town, and forever in competition with her two sluttier sisters. The best she can hope for is for Zack and one of his douchey friends to share a high-five over top of her head as tries to go all Kobayashi on their Coney Island weiners.

4:06 pm June, 25 Anonymous said...

This is the guy you read about getting bludgeoned to death with a ball peen hammer by some upper middle manager of a bank because he came home to his bored, lonely wife getting frogged on the patio by him because fat, balding out of shape hubby is busy working his ass off eighteen hours a day to keep her in designer handbags, shoes and botox parties.

Site won’t let me sign in says I didn’t answer a security question correctly??

CJTD

4:11 pm June, 25 Capt. James T. Douche said...

This is the guy you read about in the paper getting bludgeoned to death by the vice president of some bank in Florida because he caught him frogging his bored, lonely wife on the patio when he was suppose to be cleaning the pool. Fat, out of shape, balding hubby was busy working eighteen hour days seven days a week to keep her deep into designer handbags, shoes and botox parties.

Can’t sign in site says I didn’t answer a security question correctly??

CJTD

5:17 pm June, 25 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

I’m in after a fight with Word Press security. I heard DB1 hired a twelve year old IT expert with a Twinkie addiction to upgrade the site.

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Do we still have to put a dot between paragraphs? Let’s find out. Would I splooge all over pinky after I paid her $350. Yes. Yes I would. And I would leave her sweaty all over and sticky in the bungeous area.

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And I was advised by an old friend that Brett Michaels has a new line of hair metal clothes and toys for dogs at Pet Smart. I’m for reals. Son.

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Avatars.

5:24 pm June, 25 The Fake Reverend Chad said...

http://www.pornhub.com/view_video.php?viewkey=d1daa5e24f31debfc9ea

5:32 pm June, 25 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

Wow. The Fake Reverend Chad got through the porn filter. Now thew site is fixed yet slow.

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If I could guess what he would link to I would suggest it is NSFW lesbian porn. Maybe dirty Bree and Sasha in licking and strap-on action. Strap-on Son.

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Stifflers

6:09 pm June, 25 Jordasm!! said...

I don’t know guys, but the tummy-taught beauty in the pink suit sends warm butter juice dribble down my inner thighs.

Oooh spank me!!!!!!!!!!

6:18 pm June, 25 Nancy Dreuche! said...

I knew it was only a matter of time before this place got AIDS. (It’s okay to laugh again at AIDS humor.) I’m back from my vacation fellow haters. Spoiler alert: there were a couple of douchebags on my plane. So, what did I miss? Did DB1 grow a spine while I was gone? Is RevChad sober? Is that one guy still 11 guys? Did DarkSock pee in anything exotic? Does everyone still hate me? Feel free to update me if you can get past the new airport security in here. Also I’m gonna have to ask each of you to rerun through the body scan on account of my penchant for a double dose of VSR (Veiny Sac Reveal)

6:30 pm June, 25 Stephanie said...

Green slime.

3:41 am June, 26 Douchble Helix said...

Did somebody move and not bother telling DH?

4:45 am June, 26 Doucheywallnuts said...

Fleur de Lis GSR FTW. Wait, what language is that?

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I am in the Motherland, and douche/bleeth sightings abound. However, nothing as nauseating as Lime Johnson.

4:48 am June, 26 Doucheywallnuts said...

As of yet, there have been no zombie sightings. Unlike in other parts of the country. Don’t buy the K2 BS, the dead are rising.

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http://www.abcactionnews.com/dpp/news/national/another-zombie-like-attack-man-eats-family-dog-after-police-say-he-ingested-synthetic-drug-k-2

5:18 am June, 26 Olddog1 said...

Miss Hot Pink should be voted a national treasure. That is one physically fit young woman.

6:32 am June, 26 I R A Darth Aggie said...

I’d hit ’em all.

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You know what I mean. Tho telling Lime Green Douche that “you have a pretty mouth” and “squeal like a pig, son” has a certain appeal.

7:57 am June, 26 DarkSock said...

Lime should be beaten with a moose cock until he cries.

8:58 am June, 26 Jeet Kune Douche said...

Moving from left to right:

– Oooh! Yummy MILF!

– SSSSLLLLUUURRPPP SLOBBERRRRR!!!!!

– the only decoration missing is a tight grouping of 240 grain semi-jacketed hollow point from a Taurus 44 Magnum

– Another delectable MILF!

3:53 pm June, 26 Duschinstein said...

I see Macho Mans Stylists is still working

4:38 pm June, 26 Guid is Good said...

What’s with the slump gunt on the Hott on the left?

Looks like some hillside real estate I bought in Ecuador after the 1975 monsoon season.

Shouldn’t Lime Johnson be parking golf carts?

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