Thursday, June 28, 2012
Party Guy Says, "Hey, lets Party!"
But you detect a faint tremor in Party Guy’s voice when he asks you to Party.
A tinge of existential crisis.
For deep down in the recesses of Party Guy’s soul, when late at night the thumping Skrillex dubstep is a fading echo in Party Guy’s ears, Party Guy weeps for the career in business administration at DeVry he never pursued. And Party Guy sighs. For a life unfulfilled is a life wasted. Party Guy read that on a Fortune Cookie at Wong Chow’s once.
Sonja’s boobs, however, completely and utterly fulfilled their destiny.
Apparently partying with me sends people into existential crises. Do you think I could start marketing that as a service? And lordy he’s got lines shaved on the side of his head. This better be some sorta ironic shindig.
G for Gonorrhea
I barely even noticed Party Guy as my eye balls zoomed in and focused on the yumminess that is Sonja’s boobs.
G for Goofball
Otis Largeman in the background can’t bear to watch.
G is for Goddamn Sonja’s boobs are sweet
I think his glasses read fist fuck. Speaking of dubstep I wish someone would bass drop on his head literally.
G is for The Power Of Greyskull!!!!!!
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G is for Gazongas, Sonjas gozongas.
G is for Gizzies, my party drink of Gin and Izzie soda that hasn’t quite taken off yet. Ad campaign to include the tagline, “Go on and guzzle it.”
Is that a Kardashian?
Sonja’s boobs have not been nuzzled by myself. It is their destiny. I have forseen it.
Sonja’s boobs speak to me….they tell me to suckle and caress them tenderly…whilst I turn Party Guy’s face into steaming pile of teeth and mangled flesh with a tire iron.
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Tarantinos
Breaking his fingers seems like a good idea too.
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….so sayeth the breasticles.
In fact if my memory serves, I think the last guy I “partied” with ended up in the hospital afterward. It was either to be treated for a cracked pelvis or a mental breakdown. I never really followed up to get the deets. High five?
Sonja’s boobs hold the answer to “Chicken or egg?”
Sonja’s boobs are writing the screenplay to “Fifty Shades of Grey”
Sonja’s boobs grow hair during a full moon
G = gone gay, G’day
A static electricity spark from Sonja’s boobs started the Coloroado Wildfires
Sonja’s boobs are going to be used to determine of gravity waves are real.
if / of does it make a difference?
Sonja’s boobs deplete the oxygen supply in any room
Sonja’s boobs cast the deciding Supreme Court vote on health care
Sonja’s boobs could supply the needed angular momentum to knock Party Guy 3 counties over.
Sonja’s boobs could never remain in the upright and locked position.
Sonja’s boobs get paid a 37¢ royalty every time soneone yells’ Show us yer tits!”
Sonja’s boobs could give her extra income if should would be willing to rent them out on weekends for kids birthday parties. For both the kids AND the dads.
Sonja’s boobs are about as natural as a bearsharktopus.
Sonja’s boobs finished the Quadruple Bypass Burger
Sonja’s boobs can be heard on Spotify
Sonja’s boobs wrote the Olympic National Anthem for Slovenia
Sonja’s boobs started a chicken stampede in Oaxaca
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Er, Chicken Stampede I says:
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I am pretty sure that is the guy from LMFAO videos right?
Sonja for HOH.
So stupid he’s gotta go to a party store to look like he’s having a party good time. That is douchebag,alright.
John Largeman’s pajama-clad boner is quite off putting.
Jaan is right. He’s an LMFAO dancer. And it’s a Q. Doesn’t make him any less douchey, but I figured we should be accurate if we’re going to be critical.
That’s not a hand gesture, but a simple point to the bleeth he’s had surgically implanted in his head (the pinky no longer bends since the day it got lodged in a frat bros party hole). P.S. which one is Sonja. I’ll do the friend.