Monday, July 9, 2012

They Would Walk 500 Miles…

…just to buy Kelly a Mai Tai.

…then talk awkwardly about the local sports team and the weather while a bad Katy Perry song played.

…then clear their throats.

…then say “it was nice to meet you” as Kelly headed for the door even though Kelly had another hour on her Corona Light bikini promotion (she quit).

… then go home to watch midget fetish porn and hold hands.

‘Cause you know they’re gonna be, they’re gonna be the douches who gets drunk next to Kelly.

# posted by douchebag1
1:42 pm July, 9 Anonymous said...

that’s UFC ring girl, Arianny Celeste with the designers from IKEA

1:43 pm July, 9 Sir Vance of Douchemock said...

Gaybags. Nordic perhaps. Very rare. And by rare I mean venereal.

1:56 pm July, 9 Et Tu Douche? said...

She is one HOT piece of Latina ass. I loves me some Latina ass like Rev Chad loves weed, like Doc Bunsen loves good single barrel whiskey, like DarkSock loves ambien fueled boating, like Medusa loves tongue punching, like DB1 loves

Ho Hos ®. Seriously I loves me some latin women.

2:06 pm July, 9 Duck Duck Douche said...

Looks like Kelly’s inflatables are still in factory condition too, a plus.

.

The Fwippy Twins are still alive, a minus.

2:50 pm July, 9 Mr. Biggs said...

Very funny.

Now let us never mention that song again.

2:51 pm July, 9 The Dude said...

There’s a good Katy Perry song?

3:06 pm July, 9 d.baggins said...

1 word: scatalogical

3:07 pm July, 9 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

Fuck I hated and mocked that song whenever

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0KXlBeziPJ4

.

But I liked me some of this.

.

3:23 pm July, 9 Anonymous said...

Ed Bagley twins for the heat death of the universe.

4:51 pm July, 9 Nancy Dreuche said...

@anon 2:56, as long as theyre not Australian theyll do mate.

4:55 pm July, 9 Nancy Dreuche said...

Psych, they look like they’re into dudes. And I’ve stopped trying to turn ‘em since the George Michael Incident of ’05.

5:42 pm July, 9 FredN. said...

That aint no Latina.

.

She’s a Valerie Bertanelli, circa 1975. But in a good way.

.

http://formerchildactors.com/valerie-bertinelli/

6:22 pm July, 9 Et Tu Douche? said...

@FredN

.

Arianny Celeste-Penelope Lopez Marquez

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Arianny_Celeste

6:24 pm July, 9 Morbo said...

Is the guy on the right Jake Busey? Or just the last-place finisher in the Drew Carey look-a-like contest at the Rancho Cucamonga Applebee’s?

6:27 pm July, 9 DoucheyWallnuts said...

The bleached blonde tool on the right has only 4 fingers. There’s only two things I hate; people who ridicule other people based on physical deformities and malformations and people with 4 fingers.

6:29 pm July, 9 DoucheyWallnuts said...

Jack Osbourne just called to say he would rather have MS than look like these two guys and .

6:30 pm July, 9 DoucheyWallnuts said...

“And,” nothing.

6:31 pm July, 9 DoucheyWallnuts said...

Zombies strike again. Why can’t they strike where these two guys are?

.

http://sacramento.cbslocal.com/2012/07/08/woman-brutally-murdered-while-working-at-a-tracy-hacienda-inn/

6:48 pm July, 9 Nancy Dreuche said...

So this is a paid to pose with two gaybags? Damn, bottom of the barrel Monday DB1? I mean I might as well pitch a fit over the attractive waitress flirting with a customer for a bigger tip at the local Chevy’s if this is what passes for HC and DB these days. Pretty sure the war is over my compadres. That Bar model chick has said as much as well. It has been an honor mocking with you, except for the dudes that got all weird on me. D.Wallnuts is right, these zombies pose a bigger threat.

7:08 pm July, 9 Nancy Dreuche said...

Also if the whole point of this site was in order to get upset so you would have an excuse to drink, I ask you the following. Since when has anyone ever needed an excuse to drink? It’s called free will. Give it a go.

8:35 pm July, 9 The Dude said...

I must look like a complete fuck’n idiot laughing at this thread. At least I’m laughing — it helps explains the drool.

9:06 pm July, 9 Stephanie said...

The offspring of The Proclaimers..Point and slap.

1:47 am July, 10 M said...

The left guy is Swedish singer Danny Saucedo. The other guy is Swedish glamour photographer Bingo Rimér.

4:07 am July, 10 DoucheyWallnuts said...

^ I find it troubling that somebody knows this information. Am I right when I say that?

.

http://cookai.blogg.se/images/2008/noje-15s32-m-bingo-_170074w_20938006.jpg

.

http://userserve-ak.last.fm/serve/500/73826628/Danny+Saucedo+y_83c9cdf2.jpg

5:17 am July, 10 FredN. said...

Uhm, Et Tu — duh.

5:27 am July, 10 Duck Duck Douche said...

I thought they looked like a couple of Swedish meatheads…

6:34 am July, 10 Nancy Dreuche said...

The war on idiocy still rages on however.

7:13 am July, 10 Melvil_Duchi said...

la la la la. la la la la la la

9:07 pm July, 10 ehcuodouche said...

They’re havering all right. They’re havering the shit out of her.

12:34 am July, 11 Little Willie said...

The cheerleader was just wandering by when the two peter puffers point to the gal and say “how did this get here?” in that irritating faggot inflected voice.

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