Monday, August 20, 2012

Ask DB1: Whither the URC As a Totalizing Icon

————-

DB1,

I have several questions about Red Cup (and Blue Cup, Yellow Cup, et. al).

I’ve noticed that Red Cup’s SOP is to watch pensively.  Does Red Cup do anything else? Does Red Cup stare in hopeless infatuation with Hott? Does it look disappointingly at bleethed-out skank? Does it look on in contempt at tatted-up GSR douche? Or does he only watch pensively?

And, if Red Cup is so ever-present among douchebags/hotts/bleeths, is Red Cup not douche in and of itself?  As Seinfeld once said, adjacent to refuse is refuse.

Yours yet again, yada yada yada, you know how I sign off these missives,

Dan

————-

The URC (Ubquitous Red Cup) is a totalizing signifier. By this, I mean that it orients the douchal pattern, operating much as a test grid or color bars do in assisting calibration.

The URC reminds us of the purity of primary color and the simplicity of the agency of the primitive tool, at the same moment it operates in stark contrast to the post-structuralist explosion of commodity that marks douchebag in pursuit of hott.

The URC is never douchey in and of itself, since it reminds us of the purity of essence beyond the specificities of cultural marker. In other words, the URC reminds us of essence beyond culture. Color. The act of drinking. The achievements of the human race over the elements.

In so doing, URC only further heightens the repugnance of douche poo making booble fondle.

# posted by douchebag1
3:49 pm August, 20 Dude McCrudeshoes said...

Douchacles performing one of his 12 labors, palpating the breastacles of the Endowedia the Bleeth.

4:07 pm August, 20 creature said...

her boob makes his hand look small….dwarf like small

4:20 pm August, 20 Jasper said...

Looks like someone made their own brand of lemonade and filled up that glass square. From the looks of it someone’s needs to cut back on the asparagas. These two appear to be playing Tag. She is now “It”.

4:55 pm August, 20 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

What the fuck happened to my last comment that the sunburnt dude reminds me of fucking Dennis Leary and my aversion to Ford’s inspired by said douche? And I am using red cups this summer cause the discount store didn’t have clear.

.

Dillers

5:04 pm August, 20 Jasper said...

I remember Denis Leary did a pretty funny bit on douchebags. I wonder if he knows about this site. Maybe he could do a bit where he jokes about lady buttocks, and provides pictures. Like shiney new ones. Can’t say its currently being done anywhere.

5:05 pm August, 20 Duck Duck Douche said...

What cup?

6:49 pm August, 20 ehcuodouche said...

Speaking of cup, that’s what this douchebag should have done to the boobage. He’ll never have this chance again, and he’ll regret it, hopefully spiraling downward to suicide.

8:54 pm August, 20 DoucheyWallnuts said...

Phyllis Diller went tits up yesterday, and it’s a sad day. A sad day, I says. She was a great gal. She could tell a joke better ‘en any guy and then go down on you so good you’d forget your own name. Too bad she looked like the back of my balls. The side that faces my taint, I says.

.

One time we was at the Decatur Tavern and Phyliis was blowing Red Buttons back behind one of the Bingo tables and all we saw was her blonde headed wild wig bobbing up and down. She did this thing called the “Bat Wing” where she stretched your sack out as far as it would go as you were about to shoot the jibby. Shoot the jibby, I says.

.

I’m gonna miss that broad.

9:01 pm August, 20 The Dude said...

Happy purple bust bikini girl has some idiot’s hand stuck to her tit.

.

Must be annoying.

9:30 pm August, 20 Little Willie said...

Alfie the asshole says “look I just grabbed a tit” Never mind its still covered by a bikini top and the photo was staged. He tries so hard to look like a blithering idiot that people don’t think he’s acting anymore.

10:09 pm August, 20 DarkSock said...

teat

10:15 pm August, 20 REerevern chad Sotned said...

“Bat Wing” son.

4:29 am August, 21 Donger said...

It’s Jayden James (professional cock socket) and Adam Devine from Workaholics. Dongsniffers.

4:56 am August, 21 CB Popped said...

“Jibby”

Nice band Name Douchey Wall.

Not Jiggy, JIBBY I says!

5:01 am August, 21 Vin J Douchal said...

Dude is not matching his Garanimals. He probably just burst in his pants touching his first lady bit. Good for you Skippy, yes the karaoke has Toby Keith, ….. Go the Fuck away

5:03 am August, 21 CB Popped said...

http://www.kaydenkross.info/twistys/moving-day/kayden-kross-09.jpg

“Danny Bonadouchey” might be my new screen name.

5:45 am August, 21 Dr. Bunsen HoneyDouche said...

This douche obviously isn’t from the Mid-west. If he was he’d be fillin’ that cup with mam juice easier than beets go through a baby. Wait…

6:06 am August, 21 Jasper said...

Well that there is one of those actors that plays a douche on the TV. This is one of them fancy marketing pictures for the show. I can’t get all riled up over a compensated to pose picture now can I? That would be like me bragging about that lady of the evening I got to have sex with me.

6:33 am August, 21 I R A Darth Aggie said...

Can I get a second on a motion that a woman wearing a bikini and high heels is auto-bleeth?

.

This picture makes me sad. I love bewbs, and I love purple on a hott, but I’m sad, so very sad that she’s a bleeth. I’d still hit it – the power of the douchedox is strong with this one.

7:12 am August, 21 Douchble Helix said...

Man, some of you guys talk purtier’n a New Orleans whore!

7:13 am August, 21 Douchble Helix said...

Touching tribute, DW, befitting a real friend.

8:02 am August, 21 jonezy said...

I was wondering when Workaholics would find it’s way onto the site here.

.

Seems like we have plenty of experience with tight butthole with all the pear and horses DarkSock co-mingles with, and the DW stories of yesteryear. Shouldn’t be a stretch to connect the “dots”

7:38 pm August, 21 Stephanie said...

Annoying little brother needs to grow up.

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