Monday, August 20, 2012

The Surferbag learns a valuable lesson in sunscreen

Douchetatts are 0 SPF.

Bonnie is a perky and bubbly Omaha 10. There is a reason not too many people live in Omaha. It involves potato chips.

# posted by douchebag1
11:23 am August, 20 Dude McCrudeshoes said...

Douchetatts are SPF 0, but Bob Marley’s mummified head fellating your nipple is WTF 50.

11:24 am August, 20 Dude McCrudeshoes said...

Hoss Largeman to the bridge!

11:34 am August, 20 Wheezer said...

Stomach tatt: “One Load”

11:36 am August, 20 Wheezer said...

Bonnie is a girl next door cutie pie, maybe even a contender for that particular Douchie Award. I like Bonnie.

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And now my pants are tight.

11:48 am August, 20 creature said...

the slope from the top of her bikini down looks like a perfect jesus handle….’oh jesus!’

11:57 am August, 20 Jasper said...

Looks like he’s got Whistler’s Mother tattooed on his chest. I was actually alive when the original was painted. I wonder if he has one of them poop shoot tattoos of Edward Munch’s “The Scream”. You see, the mouth part would be his gaping sphincter.

12:09 pm August, 20 Dr. Bunsen HoneyDouche said...

Bob Marley look like he’s having a shouting match with Davy Jones (from Pirates of the Caribbean) over god knows what. Good thing Hoss Largeman’s man titties are giving them the necessary cover to prevent further melanomas.

12:20 pm August, 20 Jasper said...

I wonder if this feller could sell me some of that green stuff that makes my glaucoma go away, I do like to buy American.

12:33 pm August, 20 Vin Douchal said...

Woody Harrelson and Renee Zellweger on the set of “Mota Ese, The Jerry Brown Story”.

12:37 pm August, 20 Dr. Bunsen HoneyDouche said...

You think this guy’s best pick-up line is “Yeah, Danny Bonaduce is my crazy half-cousin. Wanna meet him sometime?”

12:58 pm August, 20 Anonymous said...

Reggae is for idiots

12:58 pm August, 20 Merle Baggard said...

Reggae is for idiots

1:00 pm August, 20 DoucheyWallnuts said...

My bet is her clit looks like a hand grenade.

1:16 pm August, 20 DoucheyWallnuts said...

Reggae is for idiots.

1:16 pm August, 20 Et Tu Douche? said...

“Reggae is for idiots”?????. I’ll have to disagree on this statement. I hope what you were try to convey was that guys like Surferbag, who probably ONLY listens to Bob Marleys greatest hits, and claim he’s a huge reggae fan is an idiot. Ask most hardcore reggae fans and they’ll tell you that BW did a lot to promote the the music & Rastafari however a lot of brilliant artists mostly go unheard of such The Mighty Diamonds, Culture, Wailing Souls, Mikey Dread, Burning Spear et al. There were these guys named Joe, Mick, Topper & Paul who loved reggae so much so they incorporated some of it into their own music. If you can figure out who I’m talking about I highly doubt you’d have the balls to call them idiots.

1:16 pm August, 20 DoucheyWallnuts said...

Reggie is for idiots.

1:17 pm August, 20 DoucheyWallnuts said...

I really meant Reggie I’d for idiots.

1:18 pm August, 20 Hermit said...

I don’t ask for much. I usually mind my own business around here, keep my nose clean and try not to make waves. However this is very important. I implore all of you, from our benevolent dictator on down to the quasi-electorate, please put “God Bless Pear” from Darksock’s week long ass-fest into the Hall of Pear.

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For after all, if she’s not in the Hall, then why, for the love of God, do we even have a Hall of Pear?

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Blue Jean Baby Queen prettiest girl I’ve ever seen (who cares about her face)

1:18 pm August, 20 Et Tu Douche? said...

^Not directed at you DW, you’re my favorite newest scribe, speaking of any new remembrances you care to share? it’s been awhile.

1:20 pm August, 20 Vin Douchal said...

I dunnoh, I kinda like this chick and her reverse Masonic Kabbalah Vulcan Go-In-Peace Sign. She’s even tied her red wristband around her straw so it doesn’t get wet when she goes swimming.

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Them mystics are some crazy assed maniacal she-beasts in the sack or so I’ve heard. This douche is doing it right.

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Is he a douchebag for bad tatts? Meh…. Borderline Notta, son

1:22 pm August, 20 Et Tu Douche? said...

That is some sweet pear, Hermit. You got my vote & support.

2:02 pm August, 20 Jasper said...

As a longtime pervert, first time commenter I would like to voice my support for God Bless Pear into Hall of Pear. That is a fine behind or my name isn’t Jasspear when the wife and I are role swappin’. Speaking of role swappin’since I’ve gone done shared my story how’s a bout hearing from you all. Who else thinks Hanes Her Way feels fantastic on a freshly shorn sack?

3:55 pm August, 20 Dude McCrudeshoes said...

I think my preference for Colombian double bubble is well known, and by well known I mean the sticky tube sock on the floor. Weaser’s Reef pear was also spectacular.

4:14 pm August, 20 Jasper said...

Well see here Mr. McCrudeshoes, ol’ Jasper has done a whole mess of jackulatin’ back in the day and quite frankly that was not possible without the help of the John Derrier (naked ladies on farm equipment) catalogue. It was a private subscription that would be delivered to me weekly with a modest brown paper wrapping which I in turn would give to the missus to wrap the left over smelt I had caught at the fishin’ hole a day earlier. This place used to remind me of that catalogue. I could come in, almost weekly and check out the latest heinies, five knuckle shuffle it and then still make it in time for dinner and The Wheel. What I’m saying is it would be nice to git your ladies in there too, so I can git back to regular jackulatin’.

4:20 pm August, 20 creature said...

et tu…reggae for idiots? like you, I think not…much love for all og wailers, as well as gregory isaacs, joe higgs, dennis brown, prince buster, black uhuru….the list is endless, BUT, to use the clash as validation for reggae music??? …loved their songs, if you had ever met them or heard them speak, they were truly idiots!

5:18 pm August, 20 Guid is Good said...

Boatbaggery surely?

8:03 pm August, 20 Morbo said...

Another vote for God Bless Pear for the Hall of Pear.

Good god, that ass is tremendous. Back when Thomas Jefferson was writing the Declaration of Independence, he wasn’t just stating his desire to escape a tyrannical government. He was giving hope to future generations that one day — one glorious day — God-fearing, red-blooded Americans would be able to jack it to that glorious heinie and gain momentary pleasure. Today, my friends, is that day!

10:12 pm August, 20 DarkSock said...

I’d pee in G. B. P.

10:14 pm August, 20 DarkSock said...

Re: Omaha 10

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I’d like to get Mutual with her Omaha.

4:54 am August, 21 CB Popped said...

It’s obvious that GB Pear, and The Colombian Pear Twins are instantly nominated, if not inducted, into Hall of Pear.

Scintillating Pear options.

“Mutual with her Omaha”,,,,hehe Sock.

6:55 am August, 21 FredN. said...

Don’t forget Desmond Decker.

7:31 pm August, 21 Stephanie said...

Those tatts look old and runny,therefore he is not a current obnoxious douche bag. Bad 1990’s era Bob Marley chest tatt means he used to smoke out of glass steamrollers with Bob Marley silk screened on them.

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