Thursday, September 27, 2012

Alissa Takes the Pepsi Challenge

It involves garish taste in clothes, excessive hair gel, words pronounced without the “r” sound, and a frightening rash on the inner thigh.

# posted by douchebag1
9:55 am September, 27 Choad the Douche Sprocket said...

Do women run their fingers through men’s hair anymore?

9:56 am September, 27 Choad the Douche Sprocket said...

….or do they just bounce things off it? Like their tits?

9:57 am September, 27 Vin Douchal said...

She’s probably got an e-mail name like “Beautifully Tragic”

10:00 am September, 27 Vin Douchal said...

She’s probably got an e-mail name like “Transparently Oblique”

10:02 am September, 27 jonezy said...

love those hip bone pokes. Once she turns 22 and gains about 30 lbs, she’ll pine for the days when spikey haired douchebags begged for her company.

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It looks like he was using the Pepsi to solidify his blowout.

10:03 am September, 27 Choad the Douche Sprocket said...

She’s probably got an e-mail name like “Clueless in Cancun”

10:05 am September, 27 Jeet Kune Douche said...

Betcha if Pepsi Boi walks under a lamp, his hair bursts into flame…..

10:10 am September, 27 Vin Douchal said...

She’s probably got an e-mail name like, “Chlamydia Infested”

10:12 am September, 27 Vin Douchal said...

She’s probably got an e-mail name like “Flagella Instructor”

10:23 am September, 27 Choad the Douche Sprocket said...

She’s probably got an e-mail name like “This Side Up.”

10:24 am September, 27 Choad the Douche Sprocket said...

She’s probably got an e-mail name like: “Debby Sanchez”

10:25 am September, 27 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

It is tragic photos like this that allow me to appreciate that real America is shown on “Here Comes Honey Boo-Boo.” My kids can’t get enough of that show because they are RETARDS. Retards I says. Cute retards that don’t mind that their dad kisses them goodnight with flaming vodka breath, hallucinations, and clothes that smell like weed. Fuck I’m drunk already. Time to set the office to party. Son.

10:28 am September, 27 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

She’s probably got an email name like “Air Tight”.

10:34 am September, 27 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

She’s probably got an email name like “Horny Hard A-Cup Nipples”.

10:40 am September, 27 Capt. James T. Douche said...

His head looks like a trapezoid. She looks like one of those girls you see on s “pregnant and scared?” billboard.

10:43 am September, 27 Et Tu Douche? said...

She’s probably got an e-mail name like “I’m hot your not”

10:53 am September, 27 Mr. Scrotato Head said...

Fact. In a blind taste test between Pepsi and Coke 75% of the participants failed to notice the semen that was added to each drink by the tester. Of the 25% who did notice 63% were men who looked like Orlando Bloom. And chose Pepsi because it had “fuller flavor, good head, and thicker body”. 100% of the 63% of the 25% laughed at their own joke. Then ducked under the sample table for seconds.

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Alissa is delicious like warm caramel dripping slowly over the lip of your sundae cup on a hot August afternoon.

11:16 am September, 27 Magnum Douche P. I. said...

She’s probably got an email name like – better tap this hot Latin ass quick before I pop out five kids and gain fifty pounds.

11:48 am September, 27 Vin Douchal said...

She’s probably got an e-mail name like “I Heart Lucha Libre”

11:54 am September, 27 DoucheyWallnuts said...

Bumper sticker on her Mitubishi Eclipse GT says, “My Other Boyfriend is a Douchebag, Too!”

11:57 am September, 27 DarkSock said...

She’s probably got an email name like “Jenny Talia”.

11:57 am September, 27 DarkSock said...

She’s probably got an email name like “Ginger Vitus”.

11:58 am September, 27 DarkSock said...

She’s probably got an email name like “Carmen D. Mouth”.

11:58 am September, 27 DarkSock said...

She’s probably got an email name like “Enya Buddox”.

11:59 am September, 27 DarkSock said...

She’s probably got an email name like “Tits McGee”.

12:00 pm September, 27 Et Tu Douche? said...

She’s got some great nipples by the way and kudos to the Rev for pointing that out. I missed that first time around and for that I feel shame.

12:00 pm September, 27 DarkSock said...

She’s probably got an email name like “Ivana B. Putin”.

12:04 pm September, 27 DarkSock said...

Yes, Et Tu & Reverend LiverKiller; them’s some nice chesticles. Reminiscent of petite li’l old Tal Wilkenfield, bassist for Jeff Beck who knows how to grasp a large instrument with her tiny hands:

12:08 pm September, 27 Finderweet said...

She’s probably got an email name like “Under Age.”

12:12 pm September, 27 Ferris said...

She looks like a latin Jennifer Lawrence and I dig that.

12:37 pm September, 27 Charles Smythe-Smythe-Smythe said...

Douchey @11:54 for the win. Pure genius.

1:13 pm September, 27 Wheezer said...

She’s been here before (with this choadwank, apparently) according to my Google image search and the text of the link from this page.

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I scoured the February and January 2010 posts back to about mid-January, but didn’t see it. Was it a takedown? I’m too lazy to search more. Anyone else up for it? But I swear I remember this being more recent…..

1:14 pm September, 27 Wheezer said...

Never mind: “Shleebliong” worked:

.

http://hotchickswithdouchebags.com/?s=shleebling

1:15 pm September, 27 Wheezer said...

“Shleebling^^,” that is…..

1:34 pm September, 27 bigphatnotadouche said...

Wheezer – noted HCwDB’s historian comes through again.

2:37 pm September, 27 UFO Destroyers said...

She probably had an email name like “Two years to graduation” in 2009.

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Now it’s “Class of 2013 New Horizons Alternative School.”

5:00 pm September, 27 The Dude said...

Alissa is a little sweet pea. If I was 24, and she told me to put gel in my hair — I’d do it. But no cameras. Hair gel, sex toys and lubricants belong in private.

8:57 pm September, 27 Stephanie said...

Alissa,belongs on Dr. Phil for hating her parents,and she’s on her way to that farm where they keep angry teens.

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