Friday, September 21, 2012

Friday Haiku

The Second Coming?

No; Charles Manson finally won

His bid for parole.

Quartasian Mia

sees face of God; it’s after

this guy strangles her

— Morbo

Dressing like Jesus

Scores even more under age

tang than Mall Santa.

— The Casual Teabagger

 

 

Why does Jesus smell

Like he’s been sleeping in a

Dumpster for a year?

— Capt. James T. Douche

Some Excellent Mocks

My friends! Enjoy them right now.

We will burn tonight.

— Franklyn DealorNo Doucheifelt

# posted by Bagnonymous
6:31 am September, 21 DoucheyWallnuts said...

Jesus is a Douche

Panhandling with Mary

God, the Father, weeps

6:34 am September, 21 saulgoode42 said...

Finally we know

Where Catholic girls go

Paid-to-pose Christ, bro

6:36 am September, 21 Morbo said...

Even Jesus will not

forgive damn smelly hippies

befouling the Earth

6:38 am September, 21 Morbo said...

Quartasian Mia

sees face of God; it’s after

this guy strangles her

6:41 am September, 21 The Dude said...

Aww, Jeebus why the

Long face? Don’t tell me

Your wife won’t put out

6:42 am September, 21 Capt. James T. Douche said...

Creepy, Smelly, Old

Schizo Jesusbag wants to

Grab your girls hooters.

6:43 am September, 21 Morbo said...

Give man a fish, he’ll

eat for day; teach him to fish,

he’ll still smell like pee

6:43 am September, 21 DoucheyWallnuts said...

Post-fingerbanging

Smelling the hand of Jesus

Brings you close to God

6:44 am September, 21 Horace Dangleballs said...

Jesus begs for cash

To buy Keiko a cosmo

Get on the cross, you.

6:46 am September, 21 douchebag1 said...

Haiku in absence,

Darksock less reliable

than Kardashians.

.

– management

6:49 am September, 21 Capt. James T. Douche said...

Jesusbag performed

The miracle of turning

Water into Axe.

6:51 am September, 21 Capt. James T. Douche said...

Jesusbag has been

Blessing monkey holes all day

Awaiting Rev. Chad.

6:54 am September, 21 Capt. James T. Douche said...

Somewhere there is a

Sex offender watchlist with

His picture on it.

6:54 am September, 21 DoucheyWallnuts said...

Jesus was a Jew

So the Semetic hottie

Would make Mom happy

6:55 am September, 21 Morbo said...

Manson was let out!?

No. Just guy who sleeps in box,

eats area pets

6:58 am September, 21 uncreative douche said...

Cute Penelope

Stands scared with the cult leader

asks, Why the long face?

6:58 am September, 21 DoucheyWallnuts said...

This guy’s beard smells like

Wet dog and Holy Water

With a hint of Poon

7:01 am September, 21 DoucheyWallnuts said...

The year 2012

Jesus gets his tips frosted

Picks up Bleeths on street

7:01 am September, 21 Capt. James T. Douche said...

I didn’t know that

The son of God liked bath

Salts and opiates?

7:02 am September, 21 Charles Douchewin said...

Ok, so I’m back.

Now, I’ll turn this Hott into

two fish, and five loaves.

7:02 am September, 21 Charles Douchewin said...

Is the open palm

asking for much needed peace

or a donation?

7:02 am September, 21 DoucheyWallnuts said...

What would Jesus do

If he met this bleeth clubbing?

He’d bang her, I says

7:02 am September, 21 Franklyn DealorNo Doucheifelt said...

That’s shroud of Turin?

Or it’s Turd of Hoboken?

Pay 5 bucks to know.

7:03 am September, 21 Charles Douchewin said...

The Jesus returns.

Transforms Grieco to this Hott.

A new doucheadox.

7:25 am September, 21 The Casual Teabagger said...

Dressing like Jesus

Scores even more under age

tang than Mall Santa.

7:26 am September, 21 jonezy said...

Bag hand gesture 12

The “Jesus has no money,

Can you spare a dime?”

7:27 am September, 21 Capt. James T. Douche said...

Just say no if he

Offers you his Communion

Wafer and body

7:28 am September, 21 jonezy said...

Nazareth douches.

Usually wearing crown of thorns

at 10 degree tilt

7:31 am September, 21 The Casual Teabagger said...

Jesus is bummed since

Hot cried out his Dad’s name when

they were having sex.

7:33 am September, 21 Capt. James T. Douche said...

The 12 Apostles

Are trolling for skank at

Galilee seashore.

7:35 am September, 21 The Casual Teabagger said...

Jesus back to save

the hotts from douchebags. This site

gave him the idea.

.

.

.

.

Jesus now on the same level as Denis Leary.

7:35 am September, 21 Capt. James T. Douche said...

I’m going to pray

Jesus Christ will you please send

All Herpsters to hell!!

7:37 am September, 21 THEONETRUEDOUCHE said...

though I walk through the

valley of the shadow of

death I fear Douche Bags

7:37 am September, 21 Capt. James T. Douche said...

Why does Jesus smell

Like he’s been sleeping in a

Dumpster for a year?

7:40 am September, 21 The Casual Teabagger said...

Wonder how much Him

Bling Jesus wears beneath his

white Ed Hardy robes.

7:41 am September, 21 Franklyn DealorNo Doucheifelt said...

Will Jeebus take nail?

Before he climbs up phone pole?

Or is it all show?

7:43 am September, 21 The Casual Teabagger said...

Jesus back to beg

followers to stop getting

Tatts in his likeness.

7:44 am September, 21 THEONETRUEDOUCHE said...

Mary declares Christ

has Risen. Jesus declares

No jizz on my hand

7:45 am September, 21 Capt. James T. Douche said...

Jesus needs a $hand$

In a few hours he’ll be “sick”

With the withdrawals

7:45 am September, 21 The Casual Teabagger said...

It took an act of

Christ to get DB1 to

run his own Haiku.

7:46 am September, 21 THEONETRUEDOUCHE said...

Just imagine if

Dude is the True Savior

My Ticket to Hell

7:48 am September, 21 Franklyn DealorNo Doucheifelt said...

Some Excellent Mocks

My friends! Enjoy them right now.

We will burn tonight.

7:53 am September, 21 Capt. James T. Douche said...

You said it man no-

Body fucks with the Jesus!

Fuck, we all are doomed!!!!

7:56 am September, 21 Charles Douchewin said...

When I am logged in

I can see all of my posts

but not when logged out

8:04 am September, 21 Franklyn DealorNo Doucheifelt said...

Jeebus: “Look, No Hole”

Then tells his buddies later,

“SHE’S the one got Nailed!

.

.

.

Gonna be really REALLY Hot tonight…

8:10 am September, 21 Charles Douchewin said...

The Jesus returns

Transforms Grieco to this Hott.

A new doucheadox.

8:14 am September, 21 CeeGee said...

What up, girl. Check out

My two awesome hand piercings

And I’ll save your soul

Also, I’m pretty sure this is at the last concert cafe in Houston, TX. Where both succulent latina hotts and bearded ‘bags abound.

8:50 am September, 21 FoghornLeghorn said...

Missed today’s haiku.

Bummer. A lot to mock here.

Job gets in the way.

9:04 am September, 21 Elwood BluezBag said...

Came for Holy Communion

Met Chris Robinson

They Rocked the House

9:29 am September, 21 The Casual Teabagger said...

What Would I Do? This

guy asks. Never shower on

day that ends in “y”.

9:37 am September, 21 The Casual Teabagger said...

Best pick up line is

Do you have a little Christ

in you? No? Want some?

9:41 am September, 21 The Casual Teabagger said...

Son of God gots mad

game. Named penis “Forgiveness”

Now chicks beg for it.

9:52 am September, 21 Magnum Douche P. I. said...

No Rev Chad today ?

Bet he knows better than to

mock our dear savior

.

.

.

.

That or he’s still sleeping

9:54 am September, 21 The Casual Teabagger said...

Jesus was my co-

pilot until he spilled wine

in my brand new car.

10:00 am September, 21 The Casual Teabagger said...

Old bags can not do

Haiku since they put the dildo

in their monkey hole.

10:45 am September, 21 Reverend Chad Doing An Analysis For His Wife Who Doesn't Get It In Trade For October Full Open Anal Hunting Season said...

I can’t mock Jesus

Since the gyoscope was put

In her Monkey Hole.

11:51 am September, 21 Troy Tempest said...

Jebus sucks monkey

dick and plays with his poo balls

it makes her happy.

11:54 am September, 21 Wheezer said...

Jebus Henson wants

to stick his hand up Muppet

Hott’s bottom. Me, too.

11:55 am September, 21 douchebag1 said...

The spam filter halts,

All Tebus desecration,

Sorry for delay.

.

– management

11:59 am September, 21 Wheezer said...

She told Dead Sea Scrotes,

“Take me to your leader.” King:

“You’ve done My work, sons.”

12:02 pm September, 21 Wheezer said...

Autoerotic

asphyxiation can’t stop

Tebus Carradine.

12:04 pm September, 21 Wheezer said...

[Autoerotic

asphyxiation can’t stop

Tebus Carradine.]

.

Well, for three days, yes.

“He is Risen” now takes on a

disturbing new twist.

12:05 pm September, 21 Wheezer said...

now takes on*…..“^^

12:11 pm September, 21 Wheezer said...

I’m heading for Hell

in a handbasket, but I

have a window seat.

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