Tuesday, October 2, 2012
Reader Mail: Sierra Dates a Bouff
Sierra writes in with a strange first-person tag:
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Subject: Jersey boy w a southern belle
I had never dated a Jersey guy before. Those light eyes did me in and his shocking love for country music.
— Sierra
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Short. Cryptic. And entirely unclear on the concept of this website.
Rare-ass Blue Cup does not approve.
And neither does Tom Brady.
Two days later when they consumated their relationship and Jerz Tony introduced her to A.T.M. and a Cleveland Steamer, she suddenly had second thoughts about dating a light eyed, country music loving Jersey boy.
Uncircumsized Cocck is the new Southern Girl pheremone
Cigarette behind the ear is the new badge of shame.
The Civil War will restart when Sierra introduces this douche to her folks in Shreveport.
She’s already doing a 165 degree hat turn. I give her a month max before she’s gone so far bleeth there won’t be no turnin’ back.
This southern belle made a wrong turn on the way to her debutante ball. Somewhere in Lexington, the ghost of Robert E. Lee is sobbing behind the wheel of an Iroc-Z while Bon Jovi plays in an endless loop on the radio.
This reminds me of the Neil Young tune, Southern Fran.
Soon to remind us of the Neil Young tune “Welfare Mothers Make Better Lovers”
Or a slight remake of Neil Young’s This Buds for you, This pud is for you.
Is he wearing a kilt? Are they on a NJ Transit train or a former Soviet Union airplane from the Aeroflot fleet? Aeroflot fleet, I says.
She has that certain look of “fuck it, I’ve been dumped so many times by guys that have become successful while dating me, then dump me like trash to trade up for a real hottie, leaving my gnarled broken heart in pieces that I’m just gonna go fuck some meat heads for once”
.
Or maybe she’s truly happy with that turd for brains. Hard to tell
^ Dude McC- I actually went to school in Lexington. I might of seen RE Lee’s ghost taking bong rips in the attic of Lee Chapel one night but it’s hard to remember if he was driving an I-ROC Z at that time. I’m sure he would have called it Traveller
At least he has a clean door.
2 things: 1) If she told him she liked scr-emo, he’d say he liked that to. 2) his idea of country music is Taylor Swift. Probably hers to.
Hahaha y’all are awesome. The above relationship lasted 2 months. Mainy based on alcohol consumption. No my idea of country music isn’t Taylor Swift 🙂