Monday, October 29, 2012

Von Goolo of the Week: Baron Von Goolo (not pictured, it's HCwDB after all)

A hearty and blood sucking round of applause for the brilliant and eviscerating mock brought to the site last week by the great Baron Von Goolo.

BvG is one of the longest tenured ‘bag mockers, a scholar and a gentleghoul, and a true American Vampiric slayer.

The often underexplored connection between Jesus bling and douchebaggery suggests a gothic horror tradition long lurking beneath the surfaces of the ‘bag mock. BvG was our perfect guide into that netherworld on this Hallow’s Eve.

For those of you anywhere within walking/driving/flying distance of Portland, be sure to stop by Frighttown and say hi to Baron.

Your humb narrs is back from a week of alpaca shaving.

And by alpaca shaving, I mean meditating on the relationship between jelly dong and ham dangle.

Lets do this.

# posted by douchebag1
7:45 am October, 29 Douchble Helix said...

Halt! Who goeth there? Identify thyself!!!

8:02 am October, 29 The Dude (remote loc) said...

w/b doobie1. *yawn* – yeah that was really exciting, all those unnecessarily slutty costumes. hehe – makes me wish Halloween came once a week!

.

As to your attached pic, she knows he’s a fuccen idiot. The clock is ticking, dipstick.

8:03 am October, 29 The Dude (remote loc) said...

John Largemouth will soon bite the hott’s head. She’s gotta scram, pronto!

9:06 am October, 29 Charles Douchewin said...

I like this guy (but NOT his douchey shirt). It looks like he knows he’s got a good thing there with real-world Crystal Bernard.

9:18 am October, 29 DarkSock said...

I propose that Baron Von Goolo put on his Satan Claus outfit and take the Hellm during Christmas week.
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Just puttin’ it out there.
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Rainbows in the Dahhhhhk

9:20 am October, 29 The Dude (remote loc) said...

Charles, this dimwit spent a lot of time acquiring those blonde spikes. How much time would a non-douche spend on such a project?

9:20 am October, 29 DarkSock said...

Regarding the photo above –

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That Laura Dern sure can pull some cute lesbians.

9:22 am October, 29 The Dude (remote loc) said...

He shaved his fuk’n eyebrows!! Sir Charles, I respectfully disagree, and I suspect the blonde who’s about to get her head bit by Largemouth does as well. LOL

9:23 am October, 29 JR said...

check out this amazing douchebag with hotts and his amazingly douchey song, from what i know he is a portugese-american rapper from boston haha!

9:23 am October, 29 JR said...

10:03 am October, 29 Dr. Bunsen HoneyDouche said...

That Miley Cyrus sure can pull some quality hott.

10:50 am October, 29 Ted Brogan said...

Is that a hover hand? The black dress makes it hard to tell, but he looks like a hand hoverer…

6:15 pm October, 29 Douchble Helix said...

Give David Spade a short chick, and it’s Katie-Bar-The-Door!

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Farleys.

7:58 pm October, 29 Stephanie said...

No,I don’t like this guy at all. But he’s like those freaky religious people who knock on your door,trying to spread the gospel. OR he’s some kind of drama club bisexual/confused dude. I know it’s a little shit in a douche bag shirt.

8:09 pm October, 29 Anonymous said...

Bravo, Baron.

2:22 pm October, 30 alexandreedumbass said...

All he needs is an upturned thumb & a balloon with “HEYYYYYYYYYYY” comin’ out his hole & he’d be The Fonz.

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