Wednesday, November 7, 2012

Barack Obama Wins, The Unholy Grieco Freaks Out, the DB1 Responds

As part of my reconnaissance responsibilities as lead ‘bag slayer, I have been Facebook “friends” with the Unholy source Douche of the Scrotocalypse, The Grieco, for many a moon.

I monitor this unholy cesspool as a civic duty and a national service.

But last night, in the wake of Barack Obama winning re-election, The Grieco melted down. Here is a record of our exchange.

Griecobag on Facebook:

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Another 4 more years of this shit ……. we are fucked .. WOW …REALLY YOU LIKE THE WAY THINGS ARE GOING , Maybe thats why are education system 24th in the world …….pathetic…. we have turned into a stupid country… congrats to ignorance!!!!!!!

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DB1 in Timeline:

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And that is why you’re the source douche, Grieco.

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Griecobag by message:

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And I have Know idea who you are .. but your an idiot

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It is rare indeed when DB1 and Griecobag directly clash. But when it happens, it is epic.

# posted by douchebag1
7:35 am November, 7 Et Tu Douche? said...

Kick his ass DB1!!!

7:49 am November, 7 Bag Margera said...

1st of all, George Lucas just donated almost 4 billion to education. 2nd of all, what the hell wold Romney have done to better education, besides teaching us that god wiped out the Jersey Shore because of homosexuals, and not because of Greico’s unholy influence?

8:10 am November, 7 Ted Brogan said...

So awesome. Griecobag’s grasp of the English language is spectacular!

8:11 am November, 7 Vin J Douchal said...

That feller’s got no book learnin

8:18 am November, 7 Charles Nelson Douchely said...

On the upside, at least he spelled the polysyllabic words correctly.

8:25 am November, 7 Mr. Biggs said...

Are edzhucashun system is a totol disgrais.

8:46 am November, 7 Douche Wayne said...

“You should listen to your friend, Billy Zane. He’s a cool dude.”

8:47 am November, 7 Dude McCrudeshoes said...

Education for the 99% sucks because we live in a self entitled narcissistic douche culture that doesn’t value education. Education for the 1% is just fine, and the 1% is satisfied keeping things this way.

8:48 am November, 7 DoucheyWallnuts said...

Yea, I’m with you guys and am totally psyched for another four years like the last 4! I can’t think of a time in any country when things have been better. Oh and health care that’s run like the US Postal Service! It’s been awesome and will only get better. You’ll see, really, things will start to get even better and I am sure the signs will become obvious very, very soon! Imagine how great things will get now to not have to contend with the damage done by Bush, and we have this fantastic jumping off point now where we can build on all of the successes of the past 4 years. I can’t wait.

8:51 am November, 7 Mr. Biggs said...

Remember, ladies. Greico gets more pussy than all of us bag-hunters combined. And he passionately votes Republican. Imagine being forced to raise his spawn for the rest of your life next time you think of opening your legs for a guy like that.

8:57 am November, 7 kush said...

Well said, Wallnuts. We’re in for a wild ride.

Whaa, I’m in the 99%. Gimme gimme gimme.

8:58 am November, 7 Dude McCrudeshoes said...

@Wallnuts, the past 4 years sucked balls, you are right… but 4 years and a couple of months ago things sucked syphilitic demon cock in the innermost circle of hell.

.

More then any amount of blame or credit for a single individual, even a borderline monkey-retard like GB Jr., our problem is a political system that expends 60% of it’s energy on maintaining power, 40% on sticking it to the opposite party, and 0% on serving the public.

9:09 am November, 7 Douche De Leche said...

Griecobag’s upset because there won’t be any “legitimate rape” allowed with Obama. He won’t be able to get some in the future.

9:17 am November, 7 Dude McCrudeshoes said...

@Kush, 99% and 1% is a simplified metonym. In reality you could be in the 99th percentile for income, and still be part of the highly put-up middle class who will be asked to finance this whole fiasco regardless of the party in power. You would need an Atlas V rocket and a zero gravity suit to get from where you are, to the orbit where the really wealthy play, and avoid paying taxes like those of us on earth.

9:19 am November, 7 Vin Douchal said...

HEY! It’s’s Johnny Depp! I loved your turn as Captain Jack Sparrow! And that Willie Wonka shit was off the hook! Edward Scissor hands? I never miss it on Family Channel……. What?

.

Uhm, I’m not Johnny Depp. I’m RIchard Grieco

.

Really? Have I heard of you? What were you in?

.

Uhm, Veronica Mars, Evil Breed, Booker, ya know….

.

For real? These things exist?

9:25 am November, 7 Vin Douchal said...

The douchebag whom is Patient Zero

His career burns he watches like Nero

Greasy and vile

Snorts cocaine by the mile

Turned Db 1 into a minor hero

.

.

It’s Wednesday^

9:34 am November, 7 Captain Canuck said...

Jeans, leather jacket, and black T-shirt. You’d think someone working in a creative industry might actually be creative…

9:59 am November, 7 Chris in 'Baghdad said...

On the reality check aspect on our dismal national prospects for the next 4 years, I gotta go with Walnuts. Of course I don’t independently produce Hollywood shows. I sort of have to depend on the real economy for employment, which sucks. But them’s the rules.

On 24th in education, wherever Grieco matriculated must have been 124th in English. It’s quite pathetic. In a war of words the guy shows up unarmed.

10:04 am November, 7 Colossus of Choads said...

Who would actually protest AGAINST socialised medicine?

I mean who? why?

AAAAAAARGH!!!!

10:06 am November, 7 jonezy said...

The Rev said we could all crash at his place if we need some time away from this “stupic country”. Of course the second hand high might lead to a similar state of psychosis that he experiences, but at least the health care will be free.

10:18 am November, 7 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

Gay Senators. Gay marriage, legal backyard dope. I got no beef with dat. But having to build a bunker and machine gun turret on the old man’s house, cash in my folks stocks and by gold (cause I gots the power of attorney while Dad is out hunting possums), and buy ammo with three ID’s today is a bit tiresome.

.

Ya see. The old folks don’t like having an n-word (respect cause I know a black dude) as President. They fart and burp and gripe about the Kenyan, Mooslem, Mulattoo, whatever bent on destroying the world and encouraging Catholic girls to get pregnant and then abort for shits and giggles, while he apologizes and starts taking money from the 1%. Now maybe my folks are in the 1% or maybe a bit out, but I have to listen to this shit for another 4 years.

.

And the Dems are crushing the price of oil, stocks are down, and gold is up. And I gotta listen to that shit for another 4 years. I hope it all turns out that he is The One for the next four years, everybody holds hands to get things done, and the elusive Bigfoot is found this term.

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But me, me I’m done of defending Obama when in a room of soon to be senile or blind elder child-cocks. Cause to me there the next four years look something like this.

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10:37 am November, 7 Dude McCrudeshoes said...

I ain’t defending Obama so much as I’m saying the system is broke either way, and an elitist Mormontologist whose platform had more changes than a Transformer and his pathological liar frat boy side kick aren’t much of an alternative. Though I think they could potentially dress in tights fight crime.

10:45 am November, 7 Jeet Kune Douche said...

MY thoughts:

1. The Grieco meltdown and the DB1-Grieco exchange is hilarious. It makes the day brighter for me to see this kind of dialogue. 🙂

2. The results of last nite’s election portend a grim future. By even the most favorable reasoning, the president’s 1st term was a rather significant failure. The fact that he won, and his attitude and actions during his first term, do not suggest any reason for optimism on the economic front, and neither on the civil liberties front.

3. I think we need to celebrate some Pear.

4. Mary Mammageddon makes me think of a Lost Victory. She is potentially quite pretty, but all the surgical interventions make her look like a space alien with bewbz. I feel pity and revulsion intertwined.

11:09 am November, 7 Dude McCrudeshoes said...

Is there some significance to his misspelling of the deceptively difficult to spell work “no”? Perfect Hollywood thinking in that “I don’t know who you are” ergo lack of fame, is the most biting insult imaginable.

11:11 am November, 7 Dude McCrudeshoes said...

Frick. You can never post about a spelling error without making one.

11:45 am November, 7 Anonymous said...

Jeet, I’m a little confused: you’re saying that the last 4 years were a spectacular failure, but you don’t mention the 8 years before that. As failures go, it would seem the last administration oversaw the economy tanking worse than it had since 1929–does that qualify as a success in your book in comparison to the last 4 years? Those were the alternatives to the policies that got elected. Lesser of two evils? Maybe, but I’ll take that.

.

Both parties might suck, but that job creators bullshit (that was debunked, by the way) needs to fucking go

12:10 pm November, 7 Mr. Biggs said...

Dude … is this thing on? I can’t see my own posts.

12:12 pm November, 7 Mr. Biggs said...

It’s gonna suck for the next four years no matter who’s president. If you have the ‘the economy sucks therefore we need new leaders’ argument, then you basically think the whole world needs a socialist revolution. Because A. the whole world is stuck in recession B. you think that government controls jobs and not private industry.

12:13 pm November, 7 Mr. Biggs said...

It’s gonna suck for the next four years no matter who’s president. If you have the “the economy sucks therefore we need new leaders” argument, then you basically think the whole world needs a soc1al1st r3volution. Because A. the whole world is stuck in recession B. you think that government controls jobs and not private industry.

12:14 pm November, 7 Mr. Biggs said...

socialist revolution. Does this term get blocked from being posted?

12:14 pm November, 7 Mr. Biggs said...

Hahah apparently the term “soc1al1st r3volution” gets blocked by wordpress. Problem solved. Free speech, America!

12:24 pm November, 7 DoucheyWallnuts said...

No really, I had a complete epiphany. It is really quite liberating to embrace the belief that if you aren’t as successful as the most successful that it is because they are elites who have an unfair advantage. And also, I missed believing in Santa Claus and now with another 4 years of this administration I believe that I will get and endless supply of “somethings” in exchange for nothing! I don’t even have to be good for goodness sake, I just have to put out my hand, sign a form and voila! Goodies!

Who the fuck wants a successful guy telling me that success comes from working hard? I’d much rather hear a guy tell me that I’ll be taken care of and I really don’t have to do much in exchange. The guy who takes stuff from others and gives it to me rocks. The guy who knows how to work is wasting my time. Plus that work is tiring.

And of course the Obama’s aren’t elites, just because they went to the best private schools, Ivy League schools, were part of the political machine in Illinois and never worked or had a business. Fuck that shit! I want my stuff and the system is broken, so let’s give cool guy O the only Harvard grad in the history of that bastion of elitist scumbags not to be an elitist scumbag another shot. The white guys who go to Ivy League schools are the elites, not this guy.

Plus he’s black, so he can’t really be the incompetent boob that he appears to be based on his performance and lack of grasp of economics. Remember, it’s Bush’s fault!

Also, 7.9% unemployment is so much better than the low 4%-5% unemployment rate from 2007-2008. And who cares that our currency will less and less valuable, thus making everything we make and save worthless. I’ll get food stamps and 100 weeks of unemployment!

And don’t feed me that nonsense that raising taxes doesn’t raise revenue. Big words like revenue make my head hurt. All I care about is that the rich guys I know will have to pay more in taxes, even though I will too and it will hurt me more, it’s great to know the Man is on their case! Yea fuck the rich!

I am so happy that all of this happened, I cannot believe it.

12:34 pm November, 7 Wheezer said...

McCrude (8:58 a.m.) said: More then any amount of blame or credit for a single individual, even a borderline monkey-retard like GB Jr., our problem is a political system that expends 60% of it’s energy on maintaining power, 40% on sticking it to the opposite party, and 0% on serving the public.

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That’s why I never vote for either of those parties for any office. They are truly one and the same in those regards.

12:41 pm November, 7 Dude McCrudeshoes said...

Them straw men is so easy to knock down! You can even legitimately rape their unprotected straw arses.

12:47 pm November, 7 Dude McCrudeshoes said...

@Wheezer,

That’s a worthy position. I hope someone is looking at those alternate party votes with more than the typical Dem./Rep. cynicism.

12:47 pm November, 7 Wheezer said...

Boss, that exchange is beautiful! HAHAHA!!

1:03 pm November, 7 Magnum Douche P.I. said...

Bah ! Nice jab at Grieco, DB1. Getting your political analysis from the king of all douches is like having a monkey explain calculus. But hopefully his thoughts on the election will inspire him to create some new post-modern impressionist minimalist art or what ever he is calling his collection of spilled paint and feces on canvas.

2:02 pm November, 7 Bag Margera said...

He may not know who DB1 is, but that’s okay. DB1 sounds much more employable.

3:03 pm November, 7 douche equis said...

DoucheyWallnuts, I want to have your children.

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I stopped by mostly to see what level of brag DB1 was going to feel compelled to put on today; admirable restraint, I’d call it. And the negative reactions of some of my fellow baghunters warm my heart.

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Now if only the others could ‘splain what the upside is of the $5 trillion in additional debt that Mr. Obama has bequeathed us . . . $17,000 per American, and what exactly did it get you? Dick, I say.

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I’ll also point out that the debt service on that $5 trillion, not to mention the other $10 trillion, is at an all time low. Just wait till somebody decides — again — that our likelihood of paying that shit down ain’t too high, and downgrades our debt again, thus driving up our cost of borrowing. Wait and see what that does, not only to the personal taxes you’ll have to pay, but to the blibberal dreams of utopia paid for by somebody else. Good luck with that, Skippy.

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Here’s a bit of a clue for the innumerate: every 1% more that we have to pay to borrow that money will cost every American $500 a year, or to put it in terms no one can understand, an additional $150 BILLION A YEAR per 1% rise in borrowing costs. Where’s that money going to come from, eh? (Not to mention the $50K apiece we’d have to pony up to actually pay all the prinicipal back.) Confiscate all the milionaires’ money? You can fund the goverment for NINETY DAYS by doing that — then what?

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I know numbers make things hard, because they require thought and all, so much more difficult than just calling everyone who happens to disagree with you a rich white racist (I do read your tweets occasionally, DB1), but fiscal reality has a way of taking control. You want to see where we’re headed, take a look over there at Greece . . . the folks there voted themselves a lot of lollipops, borrowed money to pay for it, and rioted when the party stopped. Can’t wait for that!

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And now, a special message to Anon fuckface — ‘Both parties might suck, but that job creators bullshit (that was debunked, by the way) needs to fucking go’:

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(I’ll say it loud so you hear it) — FUCK YOU, PAL. I started a business two years ago all by my lonesome (I _did_ build that, you might say) that now employs me and six other people. If you think there aren’t job creators, people who actually take financial risk in the hope of receiving financial reward, and whose existence benefits other people through the jobs they create, YOU ARE A FUCKING IDIOT. And if you think this administration’s policies are going to cause more of that to happen than would happen under the administration of someone who actually has a clue about business YOU ARE AN EVEN BIGGER FUCKING IDIOT THAN I THOUGHT. Got it?

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3:06 pm November, 7 douche equis said...

LOL forgot to mention — the Grieco parley is awesome, and sends my mind into an unholy spin . . . I . . . agree . . .with Grieco . . . the source of all douchiness . . .aieeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee

3:46 pm November, 7 Vin Douchal said...

Self-employed businessman here. Don’t give a shit about taxing those over 250k per year more. If you aren’t smart enough to find enough write-offs to stay under that threshold they should gouge you. Gouge, I says, have at it.

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However the very sight of Nancy Pelosi makes me want to kick my own balls into Bolivian and listening to those southern Republicans repeat the same bullet points handed to them by that tremendous phony, cock socket Michael Steele, verbatim, on every Sunday press show feels like having a root canal sans-novicaine

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However, folks

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Best line of the day yesterday wasn’t from the labia scented heavy breathing of Rachel Maddow ( love her, BTW) , the smooth eye-fuck-the-camera stylings of Martha MacCallum or even the bloviating blow hards on CNBC and Fox Business stock market shows. Nay, it was Mike “Mad Dog” Russo on his sports radio show

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Russo:

“Listen all you kooks, if Obama is elected we aren’t going to be a socialist nation and Romney is elected we aren’t going to be tossing poor people off the highest cliff. All I know is Obama is minus-320 in Vegas”

4:50 pm November, 7 Guid is Good said...

America is so fucked.

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I suggest learning from the fall of the Roman Empire, find the nearest orgy, have some nice red wine and enjoy the ride.

5:29 pm November, 7 Jeet Kune Douche said...

All I know is, the mere suggestion by me that our current new president is not perfect and was not necessarily far better than the Antichrist Bush means I’m a racist and should be burned at the stake. Oh lord……….

Gents: I’m going Galt. Yes, Really.

Goodbye, America. You were a lovely dream.

7:52 pm November, 7 MacSweenyPooface said...

So shit went wrong Obamas first term, went wrong with Bush before that, come to think of it Clinton wasn’t that great either really was he… so given recent history, is the problem really the person you elect, or the system they’re elected into?

Ok, show me some boobs now.

8:11 pm November, 7 creature said...

a pal of mine said its like chosing which shoe kicks you in the ballz

9:48 pm November, 7 Stephanie said...

Why does every asshole blame Obama? Like he’s the teacher for this whole country.? He is in some ways. I don’t doubt the numbers as the USA sinks lower in math,science,reading,etc. The teachers aren’t as top notch or we aren’t expecting enough out of the kids. In Korea the kids go to school longer,and more hours per day. There’s no summer vacation. And all I hear from these young kids,is them crying for McNuggets. Gee,We aren’t being tough enough on these little fuckers. People are breeding stupid kids.

We don’t pay teachers enough either,the argument is,parents are busy watching overpaid sports stars,and both Mom and Pop or just Mom are busy working 2 jobs these days. Maybe raise the minimum wage so people like single Mothers can make it without food stamps,and rent vouchers. We got problems,and being at war for the last 10 years sure didn’t help. I’ll get off my soapbox,now.

More photos of inflatable men,so I can let their air out.

9:53 pm November, 7 Stephanie said...

Griecobag is an idiot. It’s “you’re” not “your”,what the hell? And he capitalizes the word “Know” in the middle of the sentence. If he paid more attention to his brain,well,never mind. What’s the point? GOP=hateful cross wearing morons,who use religion to pretend they are good folks.

10:25 pm November, 7 soy bomb said...

This…

…is amazing.

10:45 am November, 8 MoeDouche said...

Hey, I didn’t know affirmative action applied to presidential elections?

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I’M BACK!!!

10:52 am November, 8 Anonymous said...

DE–That’s why I hate you stupid fucks–you never understand the question or the answer. The job creators argument is that if taxes go up by 1/2% you job creators will leave–that has been debunked–the data doesn’t support it, and, more importantly, where the fuck would you go? Anywhere that has lower taxes rates than we do generally doesn’t have indoor plumbing, either.

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Congratulations starting your own business, I’m surprised you successfully filled out all the required forms, since you clearly don’t understand our tax system, and the argruments of your own party. Fuck you too, pal.

2:18 pm November, 8 douche equis said...

Anon (hehe come on, come clean . . .) sez . . . “The job creators argument is that if taxes go up by 1/2% you job creators will leave–that has been debunked–the data doesn’t support it”

C’mon, get real. First of all, you didn’t state that argument in your previous post – if you don’t actually make your argument, it’s a bit stupid to criticize someone else saying they don’t understand it.

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Second, of course it is the case that for every increase in taxes, at the margin _someone_ will decide that it isn’t worth it to start a business, unless you’re going to make one of two ridiculous arguments — (1) that they all suddenly stop at 100% taxes, or (2) that even at 100% taxes they would all still do it. Neither position is tenable.

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If your argument is that you can raise taxes a little and still have capital formation and people creating businesses, sure, there will always be _some_. The question is to what extent you discourage it by raising taxes, or to put it another way, where you are on the Laffer curve. And frankly I don’t know how anyone knows that.

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As to bad arguments, YOUR party has been stupidly arguing for the entire campaign that Clinton’s raising taxes somehow caused the late 1990s economic boom, rather than being something he could get away with doing _because_ of the boom. That level of economic illiteracy bespeaks a party that should never be allowed anywhere near the levers of power.

1:29 pm November, 9 JD in Marietta said...

Hate to say it, but couldn’t agree with Greco Douche more. Well said Rich!! We are screwed

3:45 pm November, 10 Baron Von Goolo said...

This is among the worst places to have an intelligent political argument that I can think of.

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Idiots.

8:34 pm November, 11 Whoop-di-douche said...

Re: Baron, that’s what makes it so entertaining.

Perhaps the other WORST PLACE is in the local massage parlors, whereof I’ve been hearing rumors that the current argument is bandied about as “The Fiscal Clit.”

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