Saturday, December 8, 2012

Comment of the Week: Mr. Scrotato Head

Like a younger and more innocent pre-face-tatt Mack the Nozzle, Mr. Head brings the verbal smackdown in the My Daily Checklist thread and and wins the coveted HCwDB of the Week:

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Why the Hell do they need watches? You need a watch to maintain a schedule. To get to work on time. To be there for someone when they need you to help move furniture, or paint a bedroom. Knowing the time contributes to a well lived life.

You don’t need a watch to pick up your welfare check; you just check the mail-box every time you run out of Cup-O-Noodles. You don’t need a watch to know when the club opens; you just wait until its dark and your thirst for liquor is running rampant. You don’t need a watch to have sex because anyone can count ten seconds, even middle school drop outs. You might need a watch to buy a tattoo, but only a stolen watch so you can pawn it to pay for the tattoo.

You know when you’ll see a douchebag look at the satellite dish on his wrist and proclaim, “Drat, sorry chaps but I must be going. The touring display of pre-Scankophile vagina castings is opening tonight at the ‘Met and I simply can’t be late as they’ve asked me to say a few words and pose for some photos.”

That’s right. Never.

If you’re really really lucky you might see one look down at his watch with furrowed browl, call his bro over and complain, “I forget, does I get beer when the little hand is on the loopy number or on the one number what makes the sex joke when you put it with the other number?”

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# posted by douchebag1
1:18 pm December, 8 DarkSock said...

Q: What did the 27 year old live-at-home douchebag tell his parents he wanted for Christmas?

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A: He said “I wanna watch”. So they let him.

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Slashing takedown by Mr. Scrotato Head; can’t wait for his douchies submission.

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If the deadline for Comment O’ the Week is Friday, then DW is a fuccen lock for next week with his expose’ on George Burns yesterday.

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Chocolate Hostages.

2:58 pm December, 8 Franklyn DealorNo Doucheifelt said...

Question or clarification. Is that Mayan Eye of Coitus on the right or Mayan eye of Ass Sex?

3:24 pm December, 8 DarkSock said...

Mayan Eye of Suppressed Flatus

3:29 pm December, 8 Reverend Chad channeling John Bonham's Spirit said...

Mayan Eye of Air-Tight

3:52 pm December, 8 The Dude said...

I want to be that stupid. < from Scrote's tome (respect and 'grats). Well, stupid enough to have those choices. Okay – young enough to have those choices. I hate being 50. I want to do a Starship Troopers assault on aging.

4:15 pm December, 8 Sir Douche said...

I need a watch.

4:24 pm December, 8 Wheezer said...

Holy fuccen hell, Scrotato! That is truly wonderful.

6:35 pm December, 8 Et Tu Douche? said...

Mr. Scrotato Head is awesome and it’s good to see he’s back on form, not that he ever wasn’t but they are a few and far between these days just sayin. A watch is a watch but get yourself a nice timepiece and it’ll last you a life time.

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Brietlings

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@Rev

We wagering this weekend or what? son

7:58 pm December, 8 Vin J Douchal said...

Mr S Head has a long distinguished book of fine takedowns. This one however, kicks the douchebag culture square in their shorn nadsax. Shorn nadsax I says

11:44 pm December, 8 Reverend Chad channeling John Bonham's Spirit said...

@Et Tu

Ya Son,

San Diego over Pittsburgh straighty right up, like.

I was out with the wife’s new partners all drunkedered up and we aqll went em all out for steaks and shit and it looks like I may have to go work for her for as to make sure if the kids are as fucked up as I was they will know that they can retire before I put the high school threats to’ em. Little bitches.

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Mr. Scrotato Head is a thespian ahead of the rest of ‘em. Get it.

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I’m gonna go get a little resty now.

12:27 am December, 9 The Dude said...

Mr. Head Tater, fuk’n nice work on the Mock.

1:31 am December, 9 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

Does anybody ever wonder what is really on the other side of the computer screen? I remember a movie with Debbie Harry in in but it always reminds me of the real Allan Sheppard Astronaut (respect) and this guy that lived down the street when I was his kid. He was a Rookiee-Of-The-Year (respect) for the Vancouver Canucks in the middle of his carreer. I smell coffee.

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So this guy is living in his home town again, retired ya might say if it weren’t for a perpetual annuity on a count of the immortality,Son. I’ma not saying it’s Dark Sock, buy I ain’t sayin’ he’s sayin, just saying. Word.

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Smooothe Buzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz. Yo

6:12 am December, 9 Et Tu Douche? said...

@Rev

It’s on, $20CDN??

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