Thursday, February 7, 2013

Mo Flanders Has Crabs

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I have no idea what this headline means. Old Simpsons flashbacks may be involved.

I do know that I like Raisin Bran. I don’t just mean like. I mean like like. Like I like to snuggle up all cozy in each sugar coated raisin and search for my Rosbudian lost childhood like a whimpering man child from Alpha Centurai.

Yup. No more caffeine for me.

# posted by douchebag1
9:27 am February, 7 Mr. Scrotato Head said...

Meanwhile Stuart sits alone, sipping his virgin margarita, checking his watch for the fifth time, convincing himself that Matilde the Finnish bikini model that he met on-line playing Black Ops II isn’t going to show because she probably had a photo shoot come up suddenly and just hasn’t been able to text him.

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Because work can be demanding for Finnish bikini models.

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And facing reality for guys like Stuart can be even harder.

9:42 am February, 7 DoucheyWallnuts said...

I peed in an Alpaca Centaur once.

9:57 am February, 7 Magnum Douche P.I. said...

Mayan Eye of Ejac in My Pants. Too damn hot !

10:05 am February, 7 Vin Douchal said...

Incredibly Fascinating Read Dept:

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Current object of SOCal manhunt Christopher Dorner’s Manifesto

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Murderous wack job? Yes. Scathing accusations against the LAPD? Yes. How does a Navy commander and LAPD officer go bonkers? He had no one in the department to go with his accusations. They covered up internal affairs better than diddling Catholic Cardinal Mahoney and his gay priests. Funny how this is all happening in Los Angeles. Not funny ha ha, either

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Dorner:

“I have exhausted all available means at obtaining my name back. I have attempted all legal court efforts within appeals at the Superior Courts and California Appellate courts. This is my last resort. The LAPD has suppressed the truth and it has now lead to deadly consequences. …The LAPD’s actions have cost me my law enforcement career……

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…..

I lost my position as a Commanding Officer of a Naval Security Forces reserve unit at NAS Fallon because of the LAPD. I’ve lost a relationship with my mother and sister because of the LAPD. I’ve lost a relationship with close friends because of the LAPD. In essence, I’ve lost everything because the LAPD took my name and knew I was INNOCENT!!!

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I’m not an aspiring rapper, I’m not a gang member, I’m not a dope dealer, I don’t have multiple babies momma’s. I am an American by choice, I am a son, I am a brother, I am a military service member, I am a man who has lost complete faith in the system, when the system betrayed, slandered, and libeled me.

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I lived a good life and though not a religious man I always stuck to my own personal code of ethics, ethos and always stuck to my shoreline and true North. I didn’t need the US Navy to instill Honor, Courage, and Commitment in me but I thank them for re-enforcing it. It’s in my DNA”

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Maybe this stuff would have made a great book by Steve Lopez or some other journalist instead of having to end this way

11:47 am February, 7 The Dude said...

This guy totally reminds me of Deathtongue. She reminds me that I need a shower before I can even consider getting dirty with her.

1:07 pm February, 7 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

@Vin

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Crazy brother needs to cross the border to BC. The cops out there are el fuckos. Honkie gotta pay for his sins, yo. We will take your crazies if you take our Priestly’s.

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Gash Boxes

7:07 am February, 8 Douche Wayne said...

Stupid douchebag Flanders . . .

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