Monday, April 29, 2013

Laser Swag

1025

Dear Fabrizio.

I’m glad that your uncle owns stock in Ferrari. And it’s enough to earn you the temporary affections of Monica Belucci’s younger sister, Federica Belucci.

But earwig + bling + stupid hair + douche everything means you deserve societal wretch across your stupidface.

Sincerely,

– All

# posted by douchebag1
2:57 pm April, 29 Wheezer said...

Is there a brand name he wouldn’t wear?

.

And speaking of wear, where is everyone? Is there a field trip going on someplace? Perhaps RevChad opened up his (ahem) “organic farm” to the rest of the hatters, eh?

3:07 pm April, 29 creature said...

she’s contemplating how many leg spreads it takes to maximise the cash haul she can ply outta this tool…over under is 7

3:13 pm April, 29 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

No farm this year Wheezer. The bullshit article with my picture about how I’ve joined the firm cannot be followed up by my picture about how I got arrested in the police blotter. Besides, I’m holding too much from last year. My new vice is MMTA (Mixed Martial Tax Avoidance).

.

And shit.

3:14 pm April, 29 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

He’s wearing the earbot I’ve been looking for. Son. Put your phone on speaker like I do you tool. Son.

3:52 pm April, 29 Douchble Helix said...

I think he’s Chinese, named Chin Fung.

5:56 pm April, 29 Guid is Good said...

Fabrizio? Isn’t that a brand of spray on fabric softener?

6:13 pm April, 29 Dude McCrudeshoes said...

Ferrari-wear is just like Harley-wear, but for people who drink their PBR out of an actual glass glass. Unsurprisingly, neither demographic drives either vehicle.

6:16 pm April, 29 Dude McCrudeshoes said...

But Federica can drive a stick all the way to eleventh gear.

7:36 pm April, 29 Troy Tempest said...

Frederica has a voice like a grackle and a heart like a shrew.

.

Fabrizio has a voice like a whiny little bitch and a heart… well he has no heart. He has a blood pump.

9:44 am April, 30 Doctor Magnifico! said...

pale, sickly looking face. It comes from all the foreign branded domestic made beer he pours down his gullet and smell slightly of last seasons chinese garlic crop.

Also, he has not changed his socks in a really long time.

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