Wednesday, April 3, 2013

Limerick Wednesday

asdf

All night these lines Biff rehearses:

“Me and Todd want you both to nurse us”

Both Jan and Trish giggled,

And said with a jiggle,

“With cash you must reimburse us”

************

CD

Charles Douchewin said…

If your highest expression of humanity

is creating dance-club insanity

when the diseased and the weak

look at you and speak

try not to respond with profanity.

************

BvG

Baron Von Goolo said…

A promotional model named Brie

Kept her job till she was 43.

Now the blonde and her nips

Are taking her tips.

Now she goes home alone and weeps softly into a bag of Pirate Booty, touching herself as she watches Supernatural and lamenting how she never paid enough attention to Jerry, who *technically* wasn’t her type but he was super-nice and so into her and has a thriving dental practice now.

.

…I’m sorry, what was the question?

# posted by Bagnonymous
6:46 am April, 3 Johnny Applesack said...

No lymric, but……is that “The Ricky” with the red pube toupee in the background?

7:46 am April, 3 DoucheyWallnuts said...

There once were two trannies

Named Sammi and Danni

Those who thought them bleeths

Didn’t know they had cocks underneath

The miniskirts they wore in Miami

8:06 am April, 3 Capt. James T. Douche said...

A trio of douches celebrate

Where the drunken Bleeths congregate

Try as they might through the night

These ladies legs do remain tight

And its home once again to masturbate

8:10 am April, 3 DoucheyWallnuts said...

Two bleeths surrounded by Poo

Look like they don’t know what to do

They don’t think it’s fun

To be limerick inspiration

They’d rather be featured on Friday Haiku

8:20 am April, 3 Capt. James T. Douche said...

This scene is a hot mess

Full of douche and poser excess

Curly red and the flavor saver twins

Made sure to roofie the gin

Now they all burn with herpes abcess

8:30 am April, 3 Capt. James T. Douche said...

Assholery has run amok

No one here is going to fuck

Look at that crew who would really want to

The douches make the bleeths wanna poo

There is nothing there that doesn’t suck

8:38 am April, 3 Charles Douchewin said...

If your highest expression of humanity

is creating dance-club insanity

when the diseased and the weak

look at you and speak

try not to respond with profanity.

8:50 am April, 3 DoucheyWallnuts said...

When I look at this dross

I think “Societal Loss”

Nobody wins

When everybody sins

Why did Jesus died on the cross?

8:51 am April, 3 DoucheyWallnuts said...

Limericks are harder than Haiku.

8:59 am April, 3 Vin Douchal said...

A club scene loud and smelly

All say “Woo” as they grind to Nelly

The two hotts in the middle

Will each other diddle

And squirt juices on each others’ belly

9:06 am April, 3 UFO Destroyers said...

The poor man’s Dominic Monaghan wannabe

Signaled “I got 9 inches for your vajagee”

When much to his surprise

His hipster cohort surmised

“I want them to be in me.”

9:11 am April, 3 DarkSock said...

They are harder. No pain no gain.

versus Rev’s motto – “No pain, No pain”.

9:19 am April, 3 Choad the Douche Sprocket said...

When considering a Hobbit-like hairdo

One should be careful to avoid curls of pink poo

Samwise might glimpse

But Frodo would wince

At the thought of Gandalf scoring more pussy than they do

9:29 am April, 3 Vin Douchal said...

A douche with horrible pink hair

Holds his hands up “Hey you over there”

If my boyfriend sees this

Tonight’s rimjob I’ll miss

‘Cause my lover’s a jealous gay bear

9:33 am April, 3 Vin Douchal said...

A hott in tight fitting gray dress

Pink hair does not even impress

But give her some coke

The nurses she’d stroke

Their tongues do a clitty full press

9:36 am April, 3 Vin Douchal said...

Sure this pink hair may make seem gay

I assure you I don’t swing that way

‘Cept that time at camp

With my counselor scamp

When my face with jizz he did spray

9:40 am April, 3 Vin Douchal said...

In this pic the sexes aren’t a’mingling

Even though their crotches a’tingling

These chicks don’t dig boys

Prefer vibrating toys

This group has my gaydar a’jingling

10:23 am April, 3 Vin Douchal said...

A bunch of club posers and prancers

And easily failing romancers

But chick this shit out

You horny ole lout

Dallas Mavericks’ fuckable Dancers

10:33 am April, 3 Franklyn DealorNo Doucheifelt said...

The midrifts are bared right heres

Which could start a bone if you aren’t queers

But the douchebags will kill it

Which calls for a skillet

To be bashed in their skulls with no tears

10:36 am April, 3 Doctor Magnifico! said...

Hand gesture largeman in back

Disappointed he can’t eyeball rack

To have and to hold

When he’s feeling bold

And hopefully before his boyfriend’s back.

10:39 am April, 3 Baron Von Goolo said...

A promotional model named Brie

Kept her job till she was 43.

Now the blonde and her nips

Are taking her tips.

Now she goes home alone and weeps softly into a bag of Pirate Booty, touching herself as she watches Supernatural and lamenting how she never paid enough attention to Jerry, who *technically* wasn’t her type but he was super-nice and so into her and has a thriving dental practice now.

.

…I’m sorry, what was the question?

10:42 am April, 3 DarkSock said...

Lamenting, I says

10:49 am April, 3 Franklyn DealorNo Doucheifelt said...

Those cans are held by halters

We pray to them as if at altars

But this ain’t no church

Those ‘bags make me learch*

And my faith in our cause falters

.

.

.

.

*1. bake a foam cake

The act of throwing up.

Those comments on his FB page, make me want to bake a foam cake.

vomit throw up hurl / learch / buick gag spew

by cubudman Mar 31, 2012 add a video

11:02 am April, 3 Franklyn DealorNo Doucheifelt said...

That watch on his arm is gi-normous

That fung on his chin is just like pus

He is a douche, that is true

For that his balls will be blue

‘Till he bags the guy next to him, named Gus.

11:09 am April, 3 Franklyn DealorNo Doucheifelt said...

I want to bake a large Foam Cake

Because I look at this scene and I want to rake

By rake, I mean cleanse

Cull, shoot , mow – in whatever tense

Just change this pic to Pear – even Fake

11:27 am April, 3 The Dude said...

The lass on the right has me dreaming

Of sweeping her off without seeming

Like the horn dog I am

In search of nice mamms

And pear that needs a good reaming

12:11 pm April, 3 Franklyn DealorNo Doucheifelt said...

I’d roger that babe in the grey dress

And the two in the white with their breasts

But Chin Fung and Pink Hair

Should be eaten by a Griz’ bear

Then, “All’s Right” with the world I’d confess

1:32 pm April, 3 Scooby Douche said...

Suzy brought Mom to the raves,

but wieners practice their waves,

If Mom’s looking for dick,

she better leave quick,

Cause these losers are totally gay

1:43 pm April, 3 Franklyn DealorNo Doucheifelt said...

“No Mas” signs the douche in the center

He’s pissed – someone let these chicks enter

He was the belle of the ball

And ready to receive all

Now he’s left to pitch his own tent, er…

3:13 pm April, 3 Franklyn DealorNo Doucheifelt said...

This is a scene from End Of Days

A pustule of piss that costs us, not pays

Cause there’s a scrote with pink-hair

Amongst the douches in this lair

Amongst the douches, I says.

3:22 pm April, 3 Franklyn DealorNo Doucheifelt said...

You fuggin’ Sock!

I wrote and I wrote, while watching the clock

I shot for front page

So I’d be the rage

But I’m denied, so you can suck my…

4:55 pm April, 3 The Dude said...

I thought it might really be nifty

In the days before I turn fifty

If a costumed young hott

Would give me a shot

At having her give me a lifty

.

Okay, maybe Wallnuts is right

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