Tuesday, April 30, 2013
Nice Guy Jack Wins at the Game Of Life
Good on you, Jack. Now talk Sophie into turning down the bronzer and may all your flapjacks be maple syrup covered.
I don’t know what that means but it sounds kinda dirty.
I’m talkin’ 2am IHOP bathroom dirty.
Sophie is the lithe armed fuck buddy I have been looking for. She has a bit of that Minnie Driver big face, but it’s all good when you’re stoned, ready for the Habs to win the cup, and thrashing you’re cock around her pearly white teeth and her slender pinky gently massages your prostate in a wholesome non-homo way and shit. Then you eat her musty waffle cone.
I peed in a dirty IHOP bathroom once.
Btw, Sophie is too good for anyone, and we all know it.
The tits ain’t bad, but she kinda looks like Lou Diamond Phillips.
I don’t know that i could hit that without making all sorts of “Young Guns II” references and completely killing the mood.
I doubt that morbo has ever got his grubby mitts near a woman that fine in his life
She’s got a perky pair of round ‘uns, no doubt, but she has the complexion of a corndog.
.
Still, like a corndog though she may be orange and crisp on the outside, you know she’s still pink and juicy on the inside. I’d shove a wooden stick up her ass, drench in mustard, and eat that unidentifiable meat amalgam all day.
I dunno. If my “date” was wearing that see-through blouse stuff and all…
.
Still, Jack has no signifiers.
Lou Diamond Phillips reference FTW.
I was going to bust out my “That Lou Diamond Phillips sure can pull some hetero tail” riff but Morbo beat me to it.
.
After she leaves your bed the sheets look like a burnt umber version of the Shroud of Turin.
Jack, give her one for me.
So what if my sisters are triflin?
They just don’t know
She said mama didn’t tell ’em what she told me
Girl, u need pussy control
I’d shake both his hands if he juggles those jubilees
…make that stick a Louisville Slugger Jaques, & you’ve got a winner!
also, if Jack drizzles those mounds, all 3, with canola oil, he’ll hae 2 first rate peen slotz!