Friday, May 3, 2013
Friday Haiku
She pulled his finger;
There came a sputtering sound –
Then he was smaller.
Fifty Cent could not
stay away from the crab cakes
now needs Epi-pen.
— Douche Wayne
out of convenience
he used her head as a swab
roids make your ass bleed
— creature
It puts the bicep
In the basket or it gets
The hose. Steroid hose.
— The Reverend Chad Kroeger
**news flash**
Aw man…Slayer guitarist Jeff Hanneman has died. He was bitten by a spider a year ago and almost had to have his arm amputated; turns out that it also caused undetected long-term damage to his internal organs. He died of liver failure yesterday.
Technically the cause of death was listed as “necrotizing fasciitis”.
Which I believe is also a Slayer song.
Carry on…
**
Huge Largeman says,
This is were spider bit me,
now I’m pumped up
I cannot think of
Anything funny to write
Too horrifying.
Fishnet clad Ogre
Wielding Gold Plated Finger Probe
Bleeth become Gollum
Big biceps tiny pecs
Steph laughs but won’t spot for him
Pumpin’ ain’t easy
Gyroscope and her
Monkey hole were soon parted
When his ‘cept farted.
Thagg flexes too hard
Aneurysm pops eye out
Sweet! More room for ‘roids
RIP Jeff. That fucking sucks. Now back to our regularly scheduled programming.
Fifty Cent could not
stay away from the crab cakes
now needs Epi-pen.
When those two have sex
She’s like a thin tan condom
Stretched over his junk.
He prolapsed her twat
Just by finger-banging her.
R.I.P., Tightness.
She’s roughly the same
Size, weight as one of his turds;
She’s Doo-Doo Gollum?
If this guy found out
Where Jay Louis lived, Then that’d
Be where he died, too.
After Saruman’s defeat,
The NFL signed on lots
Of the Urak-Hai.
Friday Haiku died
After RevChad removed the
Monkeyhole Gyro…
Once bleeth tried this black
she never went back. Back to
a tight vageen. Yikes !
Darksock @ 8:32 FTW
–
Hobbits-es
Can his Ebony
Flesh Hose fit in her basket?
Her fuchsia basket?
Chick with fuchsia hair
Will regret her Muleskinning
When she gets the Herp
Got confused over
World Wrestling Fed name change;
beat up a panda.
Got confused over
new pop idols; thinks Ke$ha
wore dress made of meat.
out of convenience
he used her head as a swab
roids make your ass bleed
Got confused over
T.V. singing contests, thinks
Seacrest hosts The Voice.
Cunning bleeth mommy
arm doubles as sketch pad for
budding tatt artist.
when weather turns cold
Ginas two steamy portholes
become handwarmers
when these two hook up
the muted sounds of sex are
rip & tear of flesh
exactly big is this man?
I mean HOW big?
Stretched beaver no thang
for ‘roid shrunken schlong
we’ll be back
in the weight room ‘fo long.
I’m shit at Haiku
You already know that
Donchu?
Tatts turned to herpes
Since the gyroscope was put
In her Monkey Hole.
It puts the bicep
In the basket or it gets
The hose. Steroid hose.
Big black Billy has
A wee little willie to
Fill her stink basket,
She’s so skanky I
Wouldn’t fuck her with Et Tu’s
Wandering cock ring.
Her other boyfriend is
A primordial dwarf. She’d
Likely fuck us all.
I’d fuck that skanky
Looking broad without a dome
Cause that’s how I roll.
Thanks Mr. Sock for
Giving me time to get my
Haiku on today.
Roided up douchebag
points and thinks “Did I eat troll
doll last night or what?”
Lets keep the mocking,
Away from the racial jokes,
And on the douche poo.
.
– Management
After long workout
Bill Roidman wonders how skank
poon smells worse than him.
Red Hulk? Green Hulk? Gray?
Lightweights. Brothabag Hulk is
douchiest around
Bleeths next boyfriend asked
“What happened to your vageen?”
Saw this pic. “God no !”
Attempt at coitus
ends in tragedy when she’s
dick punted through wall
One tat for each man
she’s slept with; next one covers
head to camel toe
Butch Meathook Alive!
He is called a Small Soldier
‘Cause of roided tool
you dawg, heard yose pumpt
So I put roids on your roids,
Get ript while you rip
Sneering dark muscles
Impress over-tatted lass
So do shriveled ‘nads