Saturday, May 11, 2013

Wallnuts After Dark: What's With This Friggin' Cosplay Gig?

A couple a weeks ago my sister Josephine’s kid comes home, my niece Juliana, and she’s talkin about goin to somethin called a Cosplay Party where these kids all dress up like characters from video games and movies, or some shit like that. So Josephine asks me what I knows about it. And I says to her, “Me?!?” I says,  “Why you askin’ me?”, I says, “I don’t know nuttin’ about nuttin’ when it comes to what these kids today is doin’.”

And then when I goes to The Google I finds that this Copslay is something grown-ups do, too. Dressin’ up like chicks and guys and creatures from video games and other fictional crap. But it ain’t just dressin up, it’s actin like these fake characters, too. What the Fucc is up wit that? Kids have enough problems actin like kids, now they gotta go an act like some fake people that ain’t even people? A frustratione!

So now I hear from some half-a-Finnoch down at the Barber Shop that they’s havin a Cosplay Party for adults at the local Casa Columbo on the same night where we’s planned to have our annual Casino Night, the proceeds of which are supposed to benefit the St. Philomena Fund for dames who’s widows, and some a them orphans, too.

So Moose an Rocco ain’t too keen on this whole Cosplay development since Casino Night gives them some cover for them to go an see their Goomads instead a havin to go to their mother-in-law’s house for Lasagna and Canasta, which I wouldn’t wish on my worst enemy. Lasagna and Canasta, I says.

So Moose an Rocco decides to head on over to the Casa to see what this whole Cosplay thing is about on their way over for Lasagna and Canasta. They park their Caddy in the lot and as they’s watchin’ this parade a Mama Lukes walkin into our place they’s call me on The Cell Phone and says, “Wallnuts,” they says, “It’s a friggin’ freak show over here with all a these schnooks dressed like Super Heros and people from The Star Trek and The Star Wars!” Schnooks, I says.

So Moose an Rocco had ta leave cuz their wives was callin’ to see where they was – they married twin sisters – and tole them they better get themselves goin’.  But I heard from some a the bartenders at the Casa that there was all kinds a weird stuff goin on, details a which weren’t forthcoming.

I can’t imagine what they get out a dressin’ like someone they ain’t and pretendin’ they can do things they can’t. Back in the day these folks woulda been tole to snap the Fucc outta it and get wit the program. Today these j’drools think it’s a good thing. Madonna Mia!

# posted by Vin Douchal
12:34 pm May, 11 creature said...

i wanna hump a broad dressed like snow white & calls my plank dopey!

.

role players

1:04 pm May, 11 Guitar Gyro said...

Cosplay is like Second Life, but with costumes and physical interaction.

1:10 pm May, 11 Guitar Gyro said...

Neither are as sad as Furries, Bronies, or Juggalos though. So, they’ve got that going for them.

1:26 pm May, 11 Guitar Gyro said...

Online cosplay is like pretending to be an Italian gangster who used to hang with Frank Sinatra and then going around telling stories about it. The costume is in the form of an avatar. So you know, some people choose to dress up and go out, some people like to play from home. To each his own.

1:53 pm May, 11 Guitar Gyro said...

Do you hear that? It’s my favorite sound. It’s the sound of minds being blown.

3:19 pm May, 11 Wheezer said...

Yaya Han, anyone?

.

Yeah, dem’s fakes, I says, but I like ta look at ’em nonetheless.

4:10 pm May, 11 Douchble Helix said...

Go figure?

7:47 pm May, 11 DarkSock said...

Half-a-Finnoch , he says…
eqwqwe

7:48 pm May, 11 DarkSock said...

sder

7:52 pm May, 11 DarkSock said...

aREYRT

7:53 pm May, 11 DarkSock said...

EEWE

10:16 pm May, 11 The Dude said...

DarkSock @7.48p ftrenoB

1:13 am May, 12 The Dude said...

Fun Fact: Composer Arvo Pårt’s last name is pronounced Peart.

5:36 am May, 12 Wheezer said...

The Dude (10:16 p.m.) has gotta go take care o’ somethin’…..

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