Tuesday, June 18, 2013

Hottie Suckle Lauren is Lost

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And the Baby Tebus burps on a bowling ball filled with feral cats.

For the Bleething has overtaken and no hope remains of savior.

Only a rapid descent into middle age, suburbia, infidelity and tinnitus.

# posted by douchebag1
4:06 pm June, 18 Wheezer said...

Are “Bleeths” going to be renamed “Laurens”? What is Lauren’s surname?

4:10 pm June, 18 Steve said...

Geez, 5 pics and she’s managed to be with almost every douche there is. Herpsterbag, guidobag, brothabag, jerseybag, and toolbag. Makes me wonder if she’s doing this for a school project. Ah, who am I kidding. This chick looks like the kind of bleeth that’ll find these pics and demand they be taken down.

Anyone care to take a stab at what the “cease and desist” letter will look like? Or in her case: Cock-tease and desist.

4:34 pm June, 18 xoffender said...

damn she as hot as that teenybobber wearing leggings at the airport

4:38 pm June, 18 creature said...

certain that her cooch is an infected petri dish of fetid amoeboid fungal enriched festering cooties….if you spooned it out onto rebar & mixed it with grain alchohol, youd havta call a hazmat team…having said that, I could go buckwild on her backside with a squash racket

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bonzo boy sports A)cocaine hat B)NBA tatt & C)microphone necklace…not even worth the time spent on the beatdown he so richly deserves

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guessing these doormats are from Tulsa, or some other culturally deprived midwestern shit hole

4:45 pm June, 18 creature said...

btw, same goob from shot #2, rt. wheeze?

4:48 pm June, 18 creature said...

think #1 & #4 same kooky cat too

5:11 pm June, 18 Capt. James T. Douche said...

Fuck! Oakley Blades on Riff Raffs retarded cousin, this Bleeth doesn’t know when to quit! It’s a fuckin’ race to the bottom!

5:22 pm June, 18 Guid is Good said...

The NBA really have to look at their merchandising.

5:24 pm June, 18 Guid is Good said...

The muzzy’s have their dance of the seven veils to summon the renob. Lauren gives us the death of seven douches to kill it.

5:33 pm June, 18 Magnum Douche P. I. said...

Lauren’s cooter has a tattoo on it that says Welcome Douchebags.

5:35 pm June, 18 Magnum Douche P. I. said...

Lauren’s cooter contains seven lost 6lb watches.

5:37 pm June, 18 The Dude said...

That reNoB I got from pic #1 is gone and lost forever.

5:45 pm June, 18 Magnum Douche P. I. said...

Lauren’s cooter queefs Skrillex songs.

5:52 pm June, 18 The Dude said...

Lauren’s cooter gets decent Wi-Fi reception.

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You can watch porn in Lauren’s cooter.

5:59 pm June, 18 Charles Nelson Douchely said...

The only way this could get worse for Sleepy Jerkenstein to resurface alongside Lauren.

6:16 pm June, 18 The Dude said...

I’m pretty sure the NBA didn’t officially endorse that tatt. I’m also pretty sure COCAINE is insulted by that hat too.

6:35 pm June, 18 creature said...

Lauren’s cooter also known as the rat hole

6:36 pm June, 18 creature said...

Lauren’s cooter is dbl ought grit

6:43 pm June, 18 creature said...

Lauren’s cooter is a nappy dugout for the Hiroshima Carp baseball team…the team, however, refuses to enter without spikes

6:46 pm June, 18 Charles Nelson Douchely said...

After this encounter, Lauren tattooed “Abandon hope all ye who enter” above her cooter.

6:56 pm June, 18 creature said...

Lauren can open oil cans with her cooter

.

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55 gallon oil cans

6:59 pm June, 18 Capt. James T. Douche said...

Lauren can lift depleted uranium fuel rods with her cooter.

7:02 pm June, 18 Capt. James T. Douche said...

Laurens cooter enjoys redbull and vodka

7:03 pm June, 18 FredN. said...

That’s gotta be a fake tat, and he’s got to be doing this ironically. Wait, that makes it worse. Douche.

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And if the Cease and Desist letter comes, use this Response to a Cease and Desist letter as a template:

http://abovethelaw.com/2013/06/how-to-write-a-great-response-to-a-cease-and-desist-letter/

7:11 pm June, 18 The Dude said...

Lauren’s cooter a.k.a. Ho-tel 6

7:11 pm June, 18 The Dude said...

Lauren keeps the light on. In her cooter.

7:13 pm June, 18 The Dude said...

Lauren’s cooter resents *back door* requests.

7:17 pm June, 18 The Dude said...

Riding Lauren’s cooter has been compared by surfers to ‘Jaws’ off Maui. Getting dropped in by helicopter can give you an advantage surfing Lauren’s cooter.

7:29 pm June, 18 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

Lauren’s coooter is Dy-no-mite. Sons.

.

7:34 pm June, 18 creature said...

Lauren’s cooter getting nearly as much play in this thread as it does in da clubs

11:34 pm June, 18 DarkSock said...

Cooter rhymes with Pooter.
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Coincidence?
.
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No. NO!!! JU EATA DA KATTA-POOP!

11:42 pm June, 18 DarkSock said...

Typical N.A.H.A.S.T.S.I.** behaviour

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.

.

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**Not As Hot As She Thinks She Is**

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We’ve ALL fished outa that pond.

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Scum.

2:44 am June, 19 Guid is Good said...

Those sunglasses get a notta if you have just come out of the joint (Donk style) having gone in some time in the mid 80s. Hope they gave you your Walkman and Wham tapes back too.

6:33 am June, 19 Captain Canuck said...

Something tells me this pair don’t realize that Spring Breakers was a satire, not a how-to guide…

7:06 am June, 19 I R A Darth Aggie said...

His name is Tinnitus? what an odd child he is.

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I’d still hit her. I denounce myself, and will go to the sin bin and sit in shame.

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