Wednesday, July 10, 2013

80s Preppies Live on In Europe

eurotrash-and-giggle-hotts

Europe has always been a few years behind on the douche trends. But three decades? Seems a bit much.

Scandanavian Hott giggle sounds like a newborn wildebeest eating a truffle. Fact.

# posted by douchebag1
8:38 am July, 10 DoucheyWallnuts said...

Since we are turning into Europe does this fate await us here? If so, I’d rather turn into China, at least we’d be good at math and science.

8:59 am July, 10 Charles Douchewin said...

^I’m with Wallnuts.

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The dream of the 80’s is alive in Europe.

9:41 am July, 10 Dude McCrudeshoes said...

Greetings time travelers from the Teutonisphere. Duran Duran is back together, so nothing really important to report.

9:49 am July, 10 creature said...

the Olsen twins do Benjamin Buttons & Dorian Gray

9:52 am July, 10 Vin Douchal said...

I’d like to leave a DNA spot on that red dress a la Slick Willie Clinton. She doesn’t even have to be there

9:54 am July, 10 The Dude said...

I’d do the Scandinavian Hotts, wearing ear plugs while they wear butt plugs.

9:58 am July, 10 Dude McCrudeshoes said...

Red dress hott’s waist to bust ratio betrays her Amerinadian heritage, eve if you can’t smell the french fry oil.

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I would like fondle Olivia’s partly exposed Newton-John.

10:04 am July, 10 Douchble Helix said...

Yeah, better that we should all live in Manhattan co-ops.

11:00 am July, 10 Vin Douchal said...

Ahhh, the ’80’s. When Gator Greenwell manned the Green Moster ready to arrive in “The Show” as Jim Rice’s prodigious swing became just “digious” and Oil Can Boyd drank beer and rolled splifs with the homeless dudes under the bridge before manning the hill….

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Bleacher seats were $ 4 and beer was 75¢. The Cask and Flagon was a dive bar with one 19″ TV in the corner, not the sports bar juggernaut it is today and guys named “Red”, Sully” and “O.B.” would shake you down for a short and a shot.

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Fenway Park urinals were a nightmare. Room for 4 but dudes would shove they drunken asses in there next to you , dick out and starting pissing 5 feet before they arrived as they became 10 pishers across between innings.

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I am still psychologically damaged from being five years old and having my dad stand me at the edge of that thing screaming, “PISS, Boy! Yaz is coming up!!!” The pee would not come.

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To this day I go to the stall in the men’s room.

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Gulden’s

11:12 am July, 10 Dr Magnifico said...

This image does indeed remind me of my 80s nights. Except I was never cool enough to wear shades indoors. Of course there were girls, but only on rare occasions did I ever get to orbit their warmth.

But Sven & Jaques don’t get no notta, go-in-peace from me. On the strength (weakness) of Sven’s Noel Coward-ish artful draping of the pullover move alone, my HoS nomination is forthcoming. And let’s face it, the two blonds are barely legal, which apparently comes with impunity in that God awful toilet named Europe.

11:14 am July, 10 Dr Magnifico said...

Also, great story, Vin!

11:18 am July, 10 Vin Douchal said...

Gator Greenwell saved my sex life.

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I love pussy. Loved it as a teen. So does my cocck. As a teen I was a two-pump-chump. I could cum looking at the cover of a romance novel. This, as I understand it now, is relatively normal. Premature ejaculation is it’s name and it’s rampart for puberty challenged newbies

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While discussing this with my cool cousin Barry, he told me to think about baseball to last longer. DING! Good advice.

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Greenwell was the ugliest mofo to ever stand on a ball field. His shaved head sweated through his hat, he had smudged eye black , a giant two pouch pile of Red Man jammed in his cheek and looked like an escaped convict from an Alabama work farm. What a filthy, sweaty bastard

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While engaged in sweet, sweet lovemaking I would think about Gator almost to the point of becoming flaccid until I got the chick off. Then I’d revert to the task at hand and finish the job.

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That new found skill has come in handy over the years. Now I’m a ten-pump-chump. A 500% improvement

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Esasky

11:26 am July, 10 creature said...

Dustin Pedroia is merely a chump…jus sayin

11:32 am July, 10 Vin Douchal said...

You’d take Pedroia on your team in a heart beat. In a systole , even

11:40 am July, 10 Douche Wayne said...

I have a bad feeling these two assclowns are impossibly rich; their uncle stole tons of Bavarian art in the confusion following the Allied liberation.

I’d Nurburg her Ring.

12:20 pm July, 10 creature said...

kid can play no doubt, but, he’s that pesky kid whos jock you dosed with itching powder during JV tryouts

…my least favorite MLB player, closely followed by that punk Poopleban

12:21 pm July, 10 creature said...

btw, what’s a systole? …sounds like an STD

12:34 pm July, 10 DarkSock said...

80’s = bush.

12:55 pm July, 10 Vin Douchal said...

A systole is half of a heartbeat. I felt that way about Jonny Gomes. Then he joined the Red Sox and that dude is a laugh out loud riot. A fan favorite and wacky character

1:27 pm July, 10 creature said...

^the things you learn at HDwDB…fair nuff, I could probably drink the tyke under the table, but, I’m sure if he pulled up a stool next to mine at the bar he’d hang in there til one of us fell off…& god forbid I should live in beantown, I’d probably cheer when the lil’ fellah came to the plate

3:50 pm July, 10 Douchble Helix said...

Enough!

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I tolerate a lot of silliness on these pages, but I will not listen to another word of this Greenwell nonsense!

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Mr. Bill James explains it all here: http://books.google.com/books?id=3uSbqUm8hSAC&pg=PA245&lpg=PA245&dq=five+tool+ugly&source=bl&ots=1lr4le5Cyj&sig=xaOAYkiu-Pd5IS0B3rIl1gPBpzY&hl=en&sa=X&ei=buPdUfv9DaXbyAGa-oHQAQ&ved=0CEAQ6AEwAw#v=onepage&q=five%20tool%20ugly&f=false

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And if there are no young children around, take a gander at this: http://cardboardgods.net/2010/06/15/don-mossi/

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Joe Torres.

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