Tuesday, July 16, 2013

Sophie Disappoints Me

Yes, It's Love

Oh Sophie.

Last night you had me at “hello.” And by hello, I mean “Woooooo!! Letssss doooo shotttssss!!”

But now I see that you cohabit with the worst of beachdouche detritus.

And so I am crestfallen.

Not enough to stop staring.

But enough to stop overstaring. And by overstaring I mean burning your cleavite with the heat of Hebraic lust.

Boobs.

# posted by douchebag1
7:12 am July, 16 DouchYouWannaDance said...

DB1, you should have known better.

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Sunglasses on the head: Instant Bleeth.

7:14 am July, 16 DouchYouWannaDance said...

Fake “sunglasses” with no lenses?

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Double (D) Bleeth.

7:29 am July, 16 FredN. said...

Double D Bleeth, sure. We saw that one coming. But hanging with a Puerto Rican Keith Haring lesbian lookalike? Or is that an Assyrian Joey Ramone lookalike wearing a Keith Haring dago tee? Either way, we didn’t see THAT coming.

8:07 am July, 16 FredN. said...

Just noticed Keith/Joey’s twin on the left. WTF is going on there?

8:10 am July, 16 DoucheyWallnuts said...

BeachDouche Detritus is playing at The Stone Pony in Asbury Park tonight. They are a Bon Jovi/Springsteen/Beach Boys/Southside Johnny cover band.

8:13 am July, 16 Choad the Douche Sprocket said...

Upon closer inspection, Sophie = butterface.

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.And by “closer inspection” I mean taking my face away from her cleavage.

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.Beachcombers

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8:16 am July, 16 DarkSock said...

dsaf

8:47 am July, 16 Dude McCrudeshoes said...

Did I call the lesbionic tendencies yesterday or what? Even if that is a dude (?) I was still pretty much spot on.

9:31 am July, 16 Dude McCrudeshoes said...

Male lesbian mullet / chest tatt blends all mullets into a single, unidentifiable mess. Kind of like when your kid brother got into your Playdoh and instead of all the colors you tried so hard to keep clean, you have a big, hard brown turd and all the fun is gone forever (T_T)

9:41 am July, 16 Magnum Douche P. I. said...

If Sophie is not already doing hardcore porn (doubtful) she needs to start immediately.

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Money shooters.

10:07 am July, 16 Dude McCrudeshoes said...

that should say …blends all genders…

10:41 am July, 16 Et Tu Douche? said...

BBCMs, he of the goofy colored t-shirt, expression went from “I’d hit that so hard” in yesterdays post to accosting a stranger asking “What the Fuk just happened?”

11:54 am July, 16 Douche Wayne said...

. . . and by “disappoint” you mean “lives up to my lowest expectations.”

5:09 pm July, 16 Guid is Good said...

Sophie is on the right? Right.

5:59 pm July, 16 Douchble Helix said...

It’s like a backwards mirror with that mohawk/mullet atrocity.

9:42 pm July, 16 DarkSock said...

She has the same “I CAN HAZ UR CREDIT CARD NUMBERZ?” look in both photos.

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Stab it with Frank Mecurio.

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Wait…Where’s Medusa Oblongata?

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DAMN YOU, DOC!!!

12:39 am July, 17 Guid is Good said...

I think Sophie has that “blow your load on me and give me my cheque so I can get outta here look”.

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I’ve seen it somewhere before.

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