Monday, September 2, 2013

Kettlehead Says Happy Labor Day!

KettleheadWithoutKettle

HCwDB semi-legend Kettlehead has ditched the Kettle atopst his head to simply become… Head.

However, the douchal ‘brow remains in full effect.

As is the power to attract slutty bar hotts named Kelly.

Happy Labor Day to all long time ‘bag hunters! Your humb narrs just celebrated the one-month anniversary of this strange creature who has entered my home and demanded care. Sleep is not to be had.

So priorities have shifted around here.

But douchebags still annoy. Like this unworldly gang of barely pubescent pudwacks.

And with my unwittingly Bleethy protege, Snooki, now firmly ensconced in popular culture on the upcoming Dancing with the Stars, my penance is not yet done.

EDIT: More classic Kettlehead HCwDB here, here, here, and here.

# posted by douchebag1
8:15 am September, 2 Douchble Helix said...

No penance shall ever suffice.

.

No matter how cute your kids is.

.

And I’m proud to say I had no idea about this latest Snooki info.

8:17 am September, 2 Douchble Helix said...

Years ago, the world was aghast at the antics of a Mr. Howard Stern.

.

Today, every television show is in some way, often more than one, derived from something he did on the air.

10:09 am September, 2 dickey fingers said...

I used to see this tiny douche at ft Lauderdale bars all the time.He doesn’t like being called Pete Head.

10:13 am September, 2 The Dude said...

Years ago, I told my brother I couldn’t stand the Howard Stern show (radio version). He said how could I hold his program in disdain if I’ve never listened to it. So I tuned my radio to the H.S. program and he had a guy on there playing the piano with his penis.

.

I stand corrected. It was fuk’n hilarious.

11:02 am September, 2 creature said...

I would prefer if we ‘dubbed’ him, Skillet to the Head

11:03 am September, 2 creature said...

…btw, he’s got spiders crawling outta his ear

11:12 am September, 2 I R A Darth Aggie said...

Deer Kelly,

.

I do not have perfectly sculpted eyebrows, in fact at some point in the future I shall have one brow. And it is for that reason you should ditch Head for me.

12:57 pm September, 2 Dr Magnifico said...

God, Kettle is scarily douche. This is modern era douche. We should all hang our heads in shame.

1:25 pm September, 2 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

Kettlehead only knows of one shirt size. Too Small.

1:28 pm September, 2 The Dude said...

Biggie Smalls

2:29 pm September, 2 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

Kettlehead is the result of Arian experiments to combine the strength and sheer menacing features of the gorilla with the a commedic human experiment called the will ferrell.

8:01 pm September, 2 Kevin said...

How in the hell is kettle not in the hall of douche bag fame, this guy’s douchebag photos are the stuff of legend! So any chance this slime ball can finally win a weekly?!?!? As for the hoe bag Kelly next to him I must say last time I saw a face like hers it had a hook in it!

9:08 pm September, 2 Vin J Douchal said...

He looks constipated. He also looks like his ear is tagged like a common farm sheep. Nice look Head, if you were going for the vapid bovine creature waiting for his back, ribs and ass to be sheared look

.

Are sheep considered “bovine” ?

11:17 pm September, 2 Jacques Doucheteau said...

Dawwwww… What a cute little human-grub you have there. And already has a more mature hairdo than Kettle Head.

12:37 am September, 3 Douchesdownunder said...

Is it just me or is Kelly wrong on all sorts of levels? Always kinda found girls with blue, green or purple hair to be lacking on many fronts.

1:50 am September, 3 Guid is Good said...

It’s only a problem if the carpet matches the drapes.

5:06 am September, 3 Dickie Fingers said...

Kettlehead does not like to be called Kettlehead.

6:32 am September, 3 Plinky's Daughter said...

Immediate induction into the Hall of Cute (HoC) for DB1s baby, I say!

7:32 am September, 3 Dickie Fingers said...

I have run into Kettlehead several times in bars around Ft. Lauderdale. The boy is a fidget.

2:03 pm September, 3 SonnyChibaChoad said...

Any chance Kettlehead is related to Xenu?

11:27 pm September, 3 Douchble Helix said...

You guys realize that not her natural color, don’t you?

11:30 pm September, 3 Douchble Helix said...

Just looked at K-Head’s CV.

.

This guy is the Zelig of ‘bags. Whatever was cool a year earlier, he’s got it going.

.

Next up: The Rollie Fingers ‘stache.

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