Wednesday, September 18, 2013

The Problem with Tattoos

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Let this excellent cartoon, so simple in its visual allegory, remind us of why we fight.

Let it speak to a world where flowery peacocking has been transcribed from cloth to skin in an ever increasing exponential circus.

When the mating game’s intensifying competition among the tribe for the attention of the boobie hottie suckle thigh pits man versus iPod in a competition of digital dazzle.

Tattoos are not the problem.

They are but a symptom of a larger rot.

They remind us of how our desires, our self image, our hopes, our dreams, are each carefully molded by an intense landscape of stimulants. Carrots. Sticks. Reward. Punishment.

Do what they say and all will be well.

Fail to conform and be cast from the herd forever.

# posted by douchebag1
9:36 am September, 18 Vin Douchal said...

It’s like Manasseh, who gets one of the Twelve Tribes of Israel and the largest territory. And as the eldest son should get Jacob’s blessings as the first born. Instead Jacob’s highest blessings go to Ephraim, a much more solid dude

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This causes Manasseh to fist pump furiously and tatt up his torso and arms with bull heads,a barely clothed Hatshepsut and the known planetary constellations of the day in direct disobedience to G-d.

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Manasseh also begins to strut his thang into the bazaars while flexing through his robes with the sleeves shorn off, spiking his hair with myrrh and taking many young wives, all of which he loses interest in rather quickly.

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This so angered G-d that Manasseh’s tribe was cursed to dwelling/dancing in dark , noisy rooms by night and congregating along the Nile with many other rafts, barques and byblos with others of his ilk for generations, standing waist deep in the waters while posing senselessly and clutching goblets of prune wine by day. They stopped toiling , instead feasting of the lambs of their fathers and the shelter of their mud huts

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This manefested over the generations to today’s Douchebag. Replace Hatshepsut with Ed Hardy. Substitute bull heads with skull heads and the known constellations of the day remains constant.

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Fact. It’s in the bible. Read one

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Heathens

9:38 am September, 18 Vin Douchal said...

The previous message was brought to you by Fox News Network and approved by Karl Rove, Sean Hannity, Gretchen Carlson and Rupert Murdoch

10:12 am September, 18 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

I’m with Vin. I think DB1 got a good night’s sleep last night.

10:49 am September, 18 Ferris said...

On a brighter note, as the Google doodle points out, today is physicist Leon Foucault’s birthday, who aside from creating that cool-ass pendulum and measuring the speed of light, also was the first to use the term “gyroscope.”

For that, we all owe him a debt of gratitude. And Rev. Chad owes him at least a million in intellectual property infringement damages.

11:13 am September, 18 Douchble Helix said...

Watch “Fight For Your Right To Party”. Maybe one tattoo visible.

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The American Dream ain’t what she used to be. If those kids are saying “fuggit”, I don’t blame them.

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But I don’t have any daughters, either.

12:26 pm September, 18 DarkSock said...

That cartoon is some funny shit right there.

Gyroscopic Inserts.

6:52 am September, 19 Chris in 'Baghdad said...

This simple cartoon sez it all!

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