Friday, November 22, 2013

Friday Thoughts and Links

Fwip McFriddle and Average Sue

Ya know, it’s one set of trashiness when the ladies are getting the frontal tramp stamps to mark their skin with the taint of collective poo.

It’s quite another when average joes like Fwippy are doing it.

Not a good career move, Fwippy.

Combine the Groin Shave Reveal, fwip hair, and tonguedouchery, and it’s enough to kick an aarvark in the sphincter.

But I can’t be too upset. For it’s Friday.

And you know what that means.

Me. Scratching myself. Watching TV. And changing diapers.

Here’s your links:

Your HCwDB Retro Alt Lit Book Pic of the Week: “They’re whackin’ off to it, fer chrissake!”

The day Leonard Nimoy gave a cab ride to John F. Kennedy. An amazing read.

Things that should not happen in life: Dudes in speedos at sporting events. Regardless of whether linkbait borg website Buzzfeed finds him “hot” or not.

So it turns out if you record crickets chirping and slow it down, it sounds like people singing.

Sign #5 that the apocalypse is nigh.

Brothabags, Abs, and Nipple Reveal. (nominally NSFW)

Instagram and the female douchebag.

Qatar stadium looks like a giant, um… oyster.

Here are some porn videos for your weekend entertainment. The greatest of all women, Pornstars in videos here for you to compare you girlfriend or wife with. Once again we have found the best sex videos for you to enjoy until our next update 🙂 (Sponsored Links)

Funny faces in everyday objects. Green pepper faces for the win.

The advantages of the Pear.

Bleeth. No. Strike that. Awful human being.

Ok, here’s your pear:

Coffee Pear

And all was settled in Liliputia.

# posted by douchebag1
12:25 pm November, 22 Wheezer said...

Hep me, hep me! I been hypmotized!

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Jiggling biggling boobies…..

12:26 pm November, 22 DrVino said...

DB1 Enjoy your tofu. Preferably while reading up on ‘conservation’ vs ‘preservation’ and the Pittman Robertson Act. But look over your shoulder. I’ve seen coyotes running down the streets of LA and Bears have made it as far as Silverlake……

1:08 pm November, 22 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

That guy in the Speedo link took to me to another link which gave me an erection. As you know, my erection is huge. Unfortunately I came back and clicked the Entourage movie link and was looking at one of my nemesii, Jeremy Piven, and feeling awkward looking at the pile of douche with a visible boner in my shorts.

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I like the girls.

1:42 am November, 23 Jacques Doucheteau said...

No one seems to mention how the money paid to hunt an animal bred and raised in a controlled game reserve is used to protect wilderness areas from poachers and development. How the skin and meat is given to local tribes so they don’t have to depend on the wild population. How the naysayers dismissively demonizing Ms. Bachman (no doubt in part due her surname making them quiver at the thought of one “Michelle”) rarely contribute more than $5 towards conservation efforts that she forked out around $30k that gets pumped into the local economy and donated to local wildlife protection causes.

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I am a hunter. I am friends with hunters. They are immeasurably greater conversationalists than any urban hippie libtard ass-wipe that depends solely on agriculture and industry. Because myself and my hunter friends live hunt and in nature, and they know nature sustains them. They fight for nature, and they fight for wildlife, and the sustainable use of our natural resources. We don’t chain ourselves to diseased trees that are fire hazards, and we aren’t vegan out of some flagellant sense of guilt.

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Stepping off my soapbox now…

1:46 am November, 23 Jacques Doucheteau said...

Put anyone talking crap about this subject in the middle of some REAL nature for three days without bottled water and their smart phone. See how well they fare.

3:58 am November, 23 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

What Jacques said. I’m gonna cook me some venison chops for breakfast and selfie them on some social media for my cosmopolitans to view and comment on with ignorance and/or feigned disgust. Pussies.

6:26 am November, 23 DoucheyWallnuts said...

I think we need to have some human outreach to help animals to stop eating other animals, I am sure some of the people who care so much about preservation to the point they don’t eat anything that has to be killed can work with animals.

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I can see the bumper sticker, “Animals don’t let animals eat other animals.” Or some shit.

9:56 am November, 23 Tits McGee said...

Amen, JD…

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btw that’s a repeat pear…

10:45 am November, 23 hermit said...

Jacques is so right on the money. It’s ludicrous that some self-righteous, suburban metrosexual, living in a San Francisco condo, feels the need to force a farmer in Michigan or a rancher in Montana to conform to thier own sense of right and wrong.

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The same self-absorbed control freaks who feel rightfully indignant about being forced to live by someone else’s moral standard have no problem foisting their own twisted morality on the rest of society.

10:50 am November, 23 hermit said...

Btw a male lion will maim and drive off a rival, steal his lioness’, and savagely kill their cubs.

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Biological fact

10:50 am November, 23 Jacques Doucheteau said...

I’ve found a new toy.

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11:45 am November, 23 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

I always liked the symbiotic use of ground tiger penis snuff with tentacle bukkake.

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http://www.xvideos.com/video495151/tentacle_bukkake_for_a_nurse_

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Yellow Peril

12:47 pm November, 23 DrVino said...

Jacques Doucheteau makes me wish this comments section had “like” or “promote” buttons.

Just bought 80 rounds of 30-30 this week. If I could find 30-06 at the same price, I’d be making far more contributions to wildlife conservancy. On a more frequent basis.

1:07 pm November, 23 DouceYouWannaDance said...

Someone’s gotta side with DB1 on the Lion story.

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When I see majestic animals like that slaughtered for “sport”, I recoil in horror. Raising animals “purely to be hunted”, trapped on a Game Reserve with nowhere to hide is hardly “sporting”. And arguments of “protecting the wilderness” and being great “conversationalists” are crap. BREEDING animals just to be hunted isn’t “conserving” a thing. It’s sick. And the people that support it and envision themselves to be “better than thou” environmentalists are clueless jack-wads that hurl juvenile ad-hominem insults like “libtard” and think it makes them sound clever.

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You’re not clever, you’re a Douche.

1:08 pm November, 23 DouceYouWannaDance said...

(oops, auto-correct “fixed” “conservationalists”.)

7:46 pm November, 23 Jacques Doucheteau said...

Is breeding animals for food on a farm more humane or something?

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Maybe it is for you, since you get a nicely packaged cut of meat slaughtered and prepared for you as opposed to having to face death yourself. Though you could be vegan for all I know, in which case good for you! You practice what you preach and aren’t a hypocrite like folks that happily chow down on factory farm fried chicken and then bitch about the hunting of “majestic animals”. Chickens are quite majestic too, people should spend more time around them.

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However if you consume animal products in any way, please go recoil in horror at the treatment of all the animals that have been raised in cages and been culled for your comfort and convenience. Killing an animal that roams free on a hundred-thousand acre game reserve is FAR less sick then what animals in this country go through to get to your stomach.

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I respect what I eat, which is why I prefer to hunt for it, buy it from neighbors and the local community, or raise it myself (home grown free-range chicken eggs are the best). Like the safari hunters, my hunting/fishing license and tag fees go to conserve our dwindling natural resources. I do something, and I am involved. No disrespect DouceYouWannaDance, but what have you done?

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Putting “clueless jack-wads” and “ad-hominem insults” in the same sentence was a nice touch.

7:51 pm November, 23 Jacques Doucheteau said...

Obviously “libtard” touched a nerve. My sincere apologies, I should never have used such demeaning language. I was totally out of line.

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It’s insensitive and insulting to imply that retards are by nature liberals. My deepest regrets to retards everywhere.

6:02 am November, 24 DouceYouWannaDance said...

Wow, talk about “touched a nerve”.

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And yes, I mind what I eat. No “factory farm” meat. Soy milk.

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But that’s irrelevant. My disgust is with people that claim slaughtering animals for fun somehow puts them on some “moral high-ground”.

8:56 am November, 24 Douchie Moore said...

Recycled pear?

9:54 am November, 24 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

What Jacques said.

10:42 am November, 24 Jacques Doucheteau said...

I agree with your last point DYWD, it would be misguided at best to claim such a thing. But that’s not what I said. I said hunters are greater conservationists, which is true (Teddy Roosevelt et al.) They typically do more and donate more to protect wildlife than the urban libs – reflexively voicing their disgust at a hunted animal – that are completely detached from nature other than the odd weekend hike through Topanga State Park. And to clarify, Ms. Bachman isn’t slaughtering animals for fun. She’s a TV wildlife presenter. She hunts and fishes for a living.

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This story is getting a lot of mileage on the blogs and social media sites right now. My problem is how so many people are quick to self-righteously call for her head based on a single picture, thinking she killed some lion in the wild. You explain that it wasn’t in the wild, and then they have a problem with game reserves. You point out the good that game reserves provide and conservation work that hunters do compared with what they DON’T do, and suddenly its “oh, so you think you’re better than me, huh?” No, but what gives you the right to talk shit about something you don’t do anything about?

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Thank you for minding what you eat. Not many people do, and it is very relevant. It is hypocritical to hold such contempt for sport hunters and simultaneously eat your raised meat and eggs, take your animal tested pharmaceuticals, wear your leather boots/jacket, brush your teeth with toothpaste that contains bone meal and glycerin, live in buildings made from plywood held together with glue containing animal blood, etc, etc. Everyone on this planet owes their comfortable existence to the death of countless creatures. Why is that not disgusting, but a hunter with a picture of their kill is? Because you don’t have to face the animals you killed. You are blissfully detached from the death that surrounds you. But now here’s a picture of a dead “majestic” animal that someone else killed. You can’t be held accountable for this death, so the person who can is now an “awful human being”. How convenient. Maybe you do find all the death senseless and disgusting. Fine. Again, what are you DOING about it?

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I was a little brash with my initial comment, but the point is still valid. I was never placing anyone on any moral-high ground. Just pointing out the hypocrisy of those so quick to demonize without examining their own contributions (or lack thereof, more appropriately). Your disgust is misplaced, and born of a discomfort at the sight of the death of an animal that like many others has been thoroughly Disney-fied in this country, primarily seen in slow motion and set to a moving soundtrack. We have lions in this country too, and it’s legal to hunt them, but no one gives a flip because they don’t have majestic manes whipping in the warm African wind as the rest of the animals on the plains reverently bow down to them.

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What’s really disgusting is callously dismissing a person and making degrading comments about them based on a single photograph with no attempt to understand the story behind the picture.

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..

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Wait…I think I just missed the point to this site.

4:17 pm November, 24 Jacques Mom said...

You’ll have to excuse my son. He tries to impress people by acting clever and arguuing alot. This is becuase he is permanently scarred from watching me have dirty dirty anal sex with literally thousands of men, sometimes 3 or 4 at a time, while he was growing up. Hes also a little retarded probably from his father, though I don’t know who that is. I was knocked up from having anal sex with 10 guys in a row and all that butt jism leaking into my cooch.

11:28 pm November, 24 Douchble Helix said...

How about this? Fuck all of y’all who presume to know everything about people you disagree with, and make horseshit arguments about nature and mankind.

5:08 am November, 25 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

What Jacques said.

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@Jacques Mom

call me..

7:17 am November, 25 hermit said...

As far as the BREEDING of animals is concerned, there is nothing more satisfying than entering the glistening vulva of a willing sheep as her tail twitches like a willow leaf blown by a gentle autumn breeze.

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Also, they’ll never ask you to buy them dinner or cuddle.

10:49 am November, 25 Jacques Mom said...

You’re a b-A-A-A-A-A-Ad boy hermit.

7:20 pm November, 26 Uh-huh said...

Jeffrey Dahmer started out his murderous career killing animals for fun. Just sayin’…

1:16 am November, 27 Jacques Mom said...

And my boy Jacques peed the bed quite often just like Ted Bundy. And still does.

1:29 pm November, 27 DoucheCalypse said...

Ok, haven’t posted on this site for awhile but the overly long rantings of Jacques have touched a nerve. This piece of human garbage that DB1 has done the public service of highlighting to you is not a hunter, she is a killer. I hunt for food and because game in plentiful in my area while predators are not.

If you actually bother to look her up this woman is the very definition of Bleeth. I have never seen anyone go “hunting” and have perfect makeup and hair after three hours in a tree stand and if the Savannah is anything like the great plains I can’t believe she doesn’t have a drop of sweat. She is a internet hukster for Winchester firearms. A Madison-Avenue creation specifically designed to sell hunting weapons to women. Do you think the likeness to Katiness from the Hunger Games is coincidental?

Hunters are generally pro-conservation but this is trophy killing for advertisement. Not all hunters are “good” and not all anti-gun folks are “libtards”. Do your research a bit Jacques before getting on a soap box about tits and assholes.

1:30 pm November, 27 DoucheCalypse said...

The last sentence should read: “on a WEBSITE about tits and assholes.” My apologies.

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That’s ridicilous! :S

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