Friday, December 20, 2013

Friday Thoughts and Links

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When I witness the joyous celebration of hottie/douchey cohabit when the club kids dress up as Santabags and Santahotts, it almost make me want to be Christian.

Almost.

Then I remember this. And it’s a little more difficult.

But a happy happy and a merry merry to all those who celebrate Christmas as we get closer to the glorious day that celebrates the birth of Black Jesus.

Man.

I can’t really think of anything else to contribute after my Al Goldstein post. Except maybe this.

Here’s yer links:

Your HCwDB Buy Some Shit After Clicking This Link on Amazon Link of the Week: “Blessed are those with the groove, for they shall inherit the funk!”

NOTE: For those who want to support HCwDB in 2014, you do not need to buy the item I link to. Just click through my link, then do some shopping. Anything you buy will send a bit o’ cash my way to help keep the lights on around here.

The 20 Worst Herpster Bands of All Time. Hey! Ho! (mandolin solo)

1990 was a very silly year.

I’m not sure who Johnny Manziel is, but a few people have sent him in as an example of a fratbag/jockbag. Not sure I see it, but his girlfriend is quite buttery.

Justin Bieber something.

News anchor hates reporter. Reporter hates news anchor. Heh.

I can’t believe I missed this. The great Spike Jonze’s 2010 30 minute short film “I’m Here” is pure genius.

Malcolm McDowell pens a glorious tribute to Peter O’Toole.

I’m not much of a fan of the grunge era, but this letter from producer Steve Albini to Nirvana before the recording of In Utero could serve as life advice for all of us.

Continuing controversy over Brazil’s Ms. Bum Bum winner.

Here’s some creepy portraits of strangers that happen to look identical. But why no pairing of Fish Slap and Mac?

Okay. Nuff o that.

Cartoonpoolpear

R. Crumb just gave up cartooning forever.

# posted by douchebag1
1:18 pm December, 20 DarkSock said...

I’d pee in CartoonPool’s Pear

2:29 pm December, 20 The Dude said...

CartoonPool makes me wish I’d never quit taking acid. Or did I?

2:32 pm December, 20 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

I didn’t understand any of that except:

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-DB1 wants to be Catholic like all Jews

-Bon Iver needs slow death

-Nirvana sucks to the younger kids

-Johnny Football’s got quality quim

-Crazy Alex underplays O’Toole’s excess

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I am currently partying Peter O’Toole style.

4:35 pm December, 20 Mr. Biggs said...

R. Crumb gave up cartooning for photoshopping.

9:19 pm December, 20 Douchble Helix said...

Hey Rev!

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Canada’s Anti-Prostitution Laws Struck Down By Supreme Court

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http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2013/12/20/canada-anti-prostitution-law_n_4480105.html

12:49 am December, 21 Jacques Doucheteau said...

Steve Albini has the insider perspective into the music industry, but isn’t afraid to expose the shit for what it is: shit.

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http://www.negativland.com/news/?page_id=17

1:19 am December, 21 Jacques Doucheteau said...

Cartoonpoolpear reminds me of a stripper that talked me into a private dance in the VIP room. I intended on being in there for only one song, but she said I was really cute and nice – not like all the other guys – and asked if she could continue. Sure! She ground her exposed, shaven pussy on my swollen renoB, bound only by two layers of denim and polyester, for what seemed like forever. She even let me put my hands on her boobs. Wow! I lost track of time until at the end of a song she whispered in my ear “I’m on stage next, sorry Honey.” Oh…okay, thanks for the dance. What’s your real name? “I can’t tell you that. By the way, that was seven rounds for $140.” What? I don’t have that kind of cash. Her head snapped around to the VIP room entrance and locked eyes with a very large man with a goatee (whom I just realized had been standing there the whole time), at which point he stepped forward a step and glared at me. Uuuuhhhm, you have an ATM, right? She pointed in the direction of the video poker machines. I quickly made my way over to the ATM, under the intense case of the bouncer the entire time, swiped my card and selected withdrawl from checking. This ATM charges a fee of $9.75 for every transaction. Do you accept the charges? YES/NO Fuck me. I glanced around, loosely planning my escape. Sure I’ll never be able to come back here again, but fuck it. It’s not worth it. I’m not the first poor soul stuck between a surly stripper and a hard place to think this thought, and the bouncer knows it, because he was right there…standing by the exit. Damnit. YES, I accept the charges. I turned around after collecting my cash and debit card to find Mercedes (or Paris, Porsche, Whisper, whatever the fuck her stage name was) standing there in an entirely new outfit and 7″ pumps waiting for me. I handed over the cash and instinctively thanked her. “Thanks hon”, as she gave me a half hug and scurried off to the stage. I left as quick as I could, blowing by the stage as I saw her on stage, picking up a few dollars off the edge of the stage with her tits and cooing in some fat bald fuck’s ear, no doubt saying in a low, breathy tone “do you want a private dance, honey?”

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Yeah, so Cartoonpoolpear is one of those.

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I’d still fork out $34 in ones, $160 in twenties, plus a $99 dollar bottle service and $48 in shots for her co-workers for the chance to hit that….even though it will never, ever, ever, EVER happen.

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…and fuck you all.

6:30 am December, 21 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

@DHelix

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We are a sane country. If just the government wasn’t taking away Lenny’s right to grow. SC may change that soon too.

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Nucks

6:34 am December, 21 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

Been there Jacques.

6:53 am December, 21 DoucheyWallnuts said...

So if you bang a broad who looks like you does that mean you’re kinda gay, a narcissist or a kinda gay narcissist? That being said, I don’t think I’d want to bang a dame who looks like me, even if she was hairless in all the right places. Na mean?

6:57 am December, 21 DoucheyWallnuts said...

Also, Jacques story both gave me a renoB and filled me with pity.

11:50 am December, 21 Jacques Doucheteau said...

Most of my erections are filled with pity, DW.

12:20 pm December, 21 Jacques Doucheteau said...

It’s Christmas time is Hollis Queens

12:21 pm December, 21 Jacques Doucheteau said...

*in

12:24 pm December, 21 DoucheyWallnuts said...

Well that answers it; Santa is black…

1:41 pm December, 21 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

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