Monday, December 2, 2013

Hanz, aka The Prince of Pompoos

CIMG1501

Well I promisd it. And here it is. A true Monday morning shite sandwich.

Longtime HCwDB fan Jeff From Winnipeg alerted me to this Germanic atrocity now trying to cash in on irono-douchebaggery.

The name: Harald Glockler. But we can call him Hanz.

This extreme douchewank’s title: The Prince of Pompoos

Yeesh. The toxic stench is raw with this one. Like a pungent gouda on hottest summer’s eve. The h.C. side is less frequent, giving us at least a modicum of hope.

And by modicum, I meen ferret nad punch wingy.

Mocking must commence. And commence now.

For if there is anything holy and pure in this ungodly cesspool of a universe, then this deutschsbag will be banished to be gristle in the gears of poo churn.

# posted by douchebag1
7:26 am December, 2 Ted Brogan said...

Is it self-aware?

7:27 am December, 2 Ted Brogan said...

I would say that it’s operating in full-on irony mode. But then again, it *is* from Germany…

7:31 am December, 2 purpledrank said...

It should be clubbed like a baby seal.

Krauts.

7:31 am December, 2 Et Tu Douche? said...

Based on his biography I believe he is a full on H-Mo. I got no problem with that lifestyle. The gaudy, outrageous and narcissistic preening is a cry for attention. HC’s are in no way threatened by him. I bet this picture was taken either before or after an afternoon of shopping for haute couture and mani/pedis.

7:33 am December, 2 Ted Brogan said...

Huh. I had it pegged as “Straight as an arrow”

http://www.haraldgloeoeckler.de/wp-content/uploads/2013/06/gl-hg-01.png

7:42 am December, 2 Dr Magnifico said...

There’s something about her I like … Him, not so much.

7:50 am December, 2 Chris in 'Baghdad said...

I guess Eurotrash was not trashy enough just being Eurotrash. So it morphed. Into this.

8:02 am December, 2 Fyodor Dostedouchesky said...

Is “Bruno” based on this shitebag?

8:04 am December, 2 Ed Hardy Har Har said...

Did someone put the top of his head in a vise? Why is it smaller than nose level down?

8:38 am December, 2 Dickie Fingers said...

Pardon me if I don’t comment yet. I’ve got to take a Gloockler.

8:38 am December, 2 Tits McGee said...

Why’d you have to nuke the whole site, Hanz?

9:21 am December, 2 Magnum Douche P.I. said...

Ughh ! I feel ill looking at this walking turd. I agree, he is as queer as a three dollar bill. No threat to any hotts. Please, no more pics of him.

9:25 am December, 2 Charles Douchewin said...

I reflexively threw my hand up, in a stop-signal, between the screen and my eyes.

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Also, the name association besmirches other Hanzes of the world.

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P.O.P is the Weasel.

9:31 am December, 2 Scooby Douche said...

This guy is a one-man walking Superfund cleanup site. How appropriate that this pile of ink-stained manure is photographed in Hollywood, the asshole of the entire United States! They can just sweep him up with the rest of the garbage left in the streets after the West Hollywood Halloween party.

Just don’t dump him in Santa Monica bay, it’s already polluted enough.

She looks pure as new snow. I hope nothing crawled off that hand onto her shoulder……

9:36 am December, 2 Vin Douchal said...

Looks like Liza Minelli fucked Liberace next a nuclear reactor during an acid rain, the she took acid, drank a fifth of alcohol and soaked in a jacuzzi daily while carrying then the doctor tried to drown the baby in formaldehyde only to have it live and be suckled by a deranged rottweiler to grow into this abomination

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Disturbing

10:12 am December, 2 Douchble Helix said...

Yeah, what Vin D said.

10:37 am December, 2 The Dude said...

I prefer the summer’s gouda to this stenchpile. He’s so awful you don’t really notice the cutie unless you look very fiercely.

10:49 am December, 2 hermit said...

The golden Hindu God of Pierced Scrotums just renounced his religion and shat a warm pile of poppy seeds in the corner.

10:53 am December, 2 DoucheyWallnuts said...

Vin, you had me at, “Looks like Liza Minelli fucked Liberace.”

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Hanz has replaced the Monster Under the Bed as the source of my most frightening nightmares…

11:02 am December, 2 Ted Brogan said...

Scooby had me with “one-man walking Superfund cleanup site”, but then I think Vin Douchal really nailed it.

11:20 am December, 2 umhai? said...

Is it wrong to be more concerned about that chandelier?

11:32 am December, 2 FredN. said...

The Kroll Show is going weird places next season.

12:21 pm December, 2 Jacques Doucheteau said...

Just what the world needs. Another pudgy German guy wearing makeup and tight pants. This is the worst thing to come out of Germany since scat porn and Tokio Hotel.

12:43 pm December, 2 Wheezer said...

AAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!! Mein eyes!

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G A Y B A G

O F

T H E

Y E A R

12:47 pm December, 2 Wheezer said...

The Printh of Poundspoo

12:48 pm December, 2 Wheezer said...

Poor ‘Sock will need another 4-6 weeks on the DL after seeing this.

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The rest of us will have to join him. But that won’t be bad if he’s still able to Google some nice pear.

12:54 pm December, 2 UFO Destroyers said...

Is she checking out his Swarovski butt plug?

1:00 pm December, 2 Choad the Douche Sprocket said...

He looks like he’s staring at his favorite film: Buttman and Throbbin and wondering if the money shot compares with the scene in Moby’s Dick that he jerked off to last night.

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.She is giving me the Schoolmarm Eye of Coitus that I’ve come to know and love so well.

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What they’re doing together is anybody’s guess.

2:07 pm December, 2 Dr. Bunsen HoneyDouche said...

I think the picture of avian suicide behind them sums this up best. When a bird willing flies into a wall, you know there’s something wrong here.

6:56 pm December, 2 Troy Tempest said...

Wow. My turds spoke to me and told me he was poo. They know. This guy is like Timmy the Tacomaster by way of Dora the Explorer through the lens of a filipino bath house. His middle name is Grogan.

7:02 pm December, 2 Guid is Good said...

That top is not helping those moobs.

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