Tuesday, January 28, 2014

The Effete Sailors of Beverly Hills

CaptainWhack

I have a little poem I’d like to read in honor of this occasion, if I may. Spaulding, get your foot off the boat!

It’s easy to grin
when your douche comes in
and you’ve served all your drinks on the deck.
But the ‘bag worthwhile
is the choad who can smile
when his neckkerchief is too tight in the neck.

Okay, pookie. Do the honors.

# posted by douchebag1
11:43 am January, 28 Ed Hardy Har Har said...

He’s got his arms around her, but he’s thinking about his “little buddy”.

11:50 am January, 28 Magnum Douche P.I. said...

I usually try and avoid violence at all costs, but I have this incredible urge to stomp on this smug looking fuck’s nuts.
.
oh, and nice ‘shack reference DB1.

12:03 pm January, 28 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

I had a blazer that size when I was 11. I hear the South (respect……. may rise again) is going to get hit from the Polar Vortex. Firstly, I would like to apologized for the cold and Mr. Bieber on behalf of Conservative Canada, the liberals are fey like Spaulding above. Secondly I have a present for you to use while cleaning up after Mother Nature’s white menstruation.
.
Sons

12:03 pm January, 28 Vin Douchal said...

Choose your thrift shops wisely

1:31 pm January, 28 The Dude said...

Who is Bieber? Rev is be some kinda trivia addict.

1:36 pm January, 28 purpledrank said...

Thurston Howell the Turd.

1:37 pm January, 28 Douche Wayne said...

“YOU’LL GET NOTHING AND LIKE IT!!”

2:29 pm January, 28 Et Tu Douche? said...

Jonas Grumby would knock Effe the sailor out with one punch, fact!

2:50 pm January, 28 Wheezer said...

“Fifty bucks says the Effete Sailor Choad picks his nose.”

2:59 pm January, 28 Guid is Good said...

I’d roger her jolly.

3:09 pm January, 28 DoucheyWallnuts said...

Lady Scorpio from 15-minutes outside of Tacoma is more macho that Mr Ascot, here.
.
Speaking of Lady Scorpio, how can a transsexual advertise herself as “natural?”

3:31 pm January, 28 Magnum Douche P.I. said...

I bet effete sailor here would like a good man-handling from Lady Scorpio.

4:08 pm January, 28 DarkSock said...

WTF IS THIS WHITE SHIT FALLING FROM THE SKIES HERE IN BILOXI??? WAS THERE AN ATTACK??? AM I GOING TO DIE?
.
Reverend…?

4:10 pm January, 28 DarkSock said...

Okay, DB1; I’m game. I’ll use my last hours here on Earth as the White Death piles up outside:
.
It’s easy to grin
when you have nips on your chin
and you’ve spent the night on your back;
His nautical style
Got him Gomer’s Pile
And a shot at his un-wiped man-crack.

4:14 pm January, 28 DarkSock said...

She’s easy to spin
If you’ve give her some tens
While sporting your shrink-to-fit slacks;
Why rent-to-own
When for pay she will bone;
But when you wake up your funds you will lack.

4:20 pm January, 28 DarkSock said...

Through beer-goggle lens
She looks like a ten
For cash your world she will rock;
For some fine chopped white powder
She’ll chug down your chowder
Then you drop her back off on the block.

4:21 pm January, 28 DarkSock said...

Anybody out there? Am I the only one left alive?
.
DAMN YOU WHITE DEATH

5:10 pm January, 28 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

I’m with you Sock. Don’t fret. It’s all in the attitude. Let me get a little stoned before I bestow my arctic tales to you. Son.
.
And don’t fucking drive till I get back.

7:43 pm January, 28 DoucheyWallnuts said...

I’d rather spend more time exploring slixa for the freaks.
.
That being said, don’t be such a pussy about the snow.

8:18 pm January, 28 Ed Hardy Har Har said...

When I lived in Biloxi (for the five longest years of my life), it never snowed.
.
.
.
.
.
End times. Sons.
.
And fuck you all.

8:25 pm January, 28 Troy Tempest said...

And IIRC, Alaska broke it’s all time record high for January EVER.

10:33 pm January, 28 The Dude said...

He’s a Poofus™.

11:06 am January, 29 Douche Wayne said...

I’d loofa her stretchmarks.

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