Monday, January 13, 2014

Creepy Kal Hangs Loose Behind Jennifer

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HCwDB hired an expert linguistic trained in ancient Aramaic to translate Creepy Kal’s disturbing under-breast tattoo.

Here are the results of our scholar’s diligent efforts:

When dawn turns to dusk during rainy season, and frogs poop Flav-o-ice like so many porcupine twills, only then will the poultry be fondled.

Historians and scholars will spend many a journal article debating the meaning of this enigmatic archival work.

# posted by douchebag1
11:45 am January, 13 Vin Douchal said...

Chucklehead

11:50 am January, 13 Magnum Douche P.I. said...

Chucklehead and Saggyboobs. I think we have a new NBC sitcom in the making.

12:05 pm January, 13 Charles Douchewin said...

Leopard Bikini top looks like it’s hanging on for dear life.
.
For all of our sakes – please don’t give up, Leopard Bikini!

12:14 pm January, 13 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

Pancake Patty ponders being servant to the penis.

12:19 pm January, 13 Dr. Bunsen HoneyDouche said...

Her: “He’s still behind me isn’t he?”
.
Dicktard: “Why you point soul stealing device at me? Me gonna break it!”

12:36 pm January, 13 DoucheyWallnuts said...

Pancake Patty, Servant to the Penis, Yes. Hott, Negative.

1:30 pm January, 13 The Dude said...

That girl needs a Miracle Bra™.
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That guy needs a Fish Slap™.

1:51 pm January, 13 Guid is Good said...

Confucius says, “floppy hat, floppy titties.” It loses a bit in translation.
.
Occidentals

1:52 pm January, 13 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

2:01 pm January, 13 DoucheyWallnuts said...

Rev, what do they do with all of the excess Jew Nose?

2:49 pm January, 13 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

Oops. Wrong link.
.
They take the excess Jew nose and mix it with the Bris-tips. They are then burned with the tears of the Holocaust and palm leaves to create the chrism for Catholic confirmation ceremonies. They are the chosen after all. Mrs. Kroeger was lucky that her grandmother fucked her way out of the camp by banging a Nazi Arian (absolutely no respect) and she has the straighest nose and knees I’ve ever seen. I loves me the symmetrical Jew broads. If only she’d stop spending so much money on the horse shit, and the swimming shit, and the dance shit, and the girls hockey shit. I’m depressed now, time to mix my weed with Cymbalta and smoke my trivial worries away.
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Here we go. https://myspace.com/vindouchal/music/song/francine-66984292-73479374

4:29 pm January, 13 DarkSock said...

Those boobs broke up the Beatles.

4:29 pm January, 13 DarkSock said...

Those boobs concealed Lee Harvey Oswald.

4:30 pm January, 13 DarkSock said...

Those boobs gave Spiderman cancer.

4:30 pm January, 13 DarkSock said...

Those boobs can be used as rotation devices.

9:19 pm January, 13 purpledrank said...

Those boobs killed Ariel Sharon. Too soon?

11:58 pm January, 13 Jacques Doucheteau said...

Those are some tragic tits. Like when you buy a new pair of boots and they run that huge callous on the side of your big toe and it forms a huge blister, and then the blister pops and partially tears open so that your left with this flabby white flap of gelatinous flesh hanging of the side of your toe. That’s what those tits are like.

11:59 pm January, 13 Jacques Doucheteau said...

Those tits are used as foley for the sound of people getting punched in the face in movies.

11:59 pm January, 13 Jacques Doucheteau said...

Her nipples point at her spine.

12:00 am January, 14 Jacques Doucheteau said...

Those tits are so flabby she lactates pizza sauce.

12:01 am January, 14 Jacques Doucheteau said...

Those tits are often mistaken for her labia.

12:01 am January, 14 Jacques Doucheteau said...

Those tits are so flabby in a pinch she can use them to wipe if there’s no toilet paper.

12:02 am January, 14 Jacques Doucheteau said...

Those tits are so flabby they have cankles.

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