Classic ‘Bag Sandwich #45: The “Double Doucher”
A tasty serving of boobie hottie suckle thigh roasted lightly in olive oil, then sandwiched between two slices of poomento loaf.
I call it The Double Doucher.
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Chad believed in a more literal approach to getting through to Danielle.
Ask DB1: Why the Lack of Brothabags?
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DB1,
Speaking of Chris Brown (a huge douche any way you slice it), why do you give so many Brothabags a “nottadouche” pass? You barely feature any on the site as it is. Surely in this world, douchebags come in all shapes and sizes. Why the lack of Brothabags?
— I, Douchebot
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Here’s the thing about Brothabags, Douchebot. It’s not that I don’t want to post more Afro-Douchemericans on the site, as I believe wankscrotery cuts across all racial, national and ethnic lines and is a global plague that should be mocked in all of its forms. I simply don’t get enough good brothabag pics to run in the mix.
Secondly, the classic douchebag iconography tends to be white suburban poseurs living off their parents while trying to act “gangsta.” Brothabags rarely make the stupid faux-hair, facial fung patterns and really silly hand gestures that are the main markers of ‘bag.
With exceptions, of course, as we see here with the extremely douchey Brothabag Phil.
Super Baggio Brother
Heavy is the crotch that wears the crown.
Category: "Shirts"
He’ll take shirts for $600 dollars, Alex.
Category: “Shirts”
He’ll take shirts for $600 dollars, Alex.
Reader Mail: Chris Brown is a Douche
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Hello DB1!!
I’m relatively new to the site, but I just thought I’d drop you a line and let you know that I think it’s utterly effing GENIUS, and also to make a suggestion.
I think you should make a blog about Chris Brown for going all Ike Turner on that beautiful little flower of suckle thigh, Rihanna. Any “man” who beats up on a woman automatically qualifies as douche, especially when you do it in the public eye, no less.
Thanks for your time, DB1, as I know that the verbal smackdown of the scrote is a time consuming job 🙂 Love & Kisses from The Hell-Mouth (Staten Island)
–Frances
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I grant you that Chris Brown is a douche, Francis, but it’s important to remember that physical abuse goes beyond the realm of douchebaggery and into the land of assholery.
Douchebaggery tends to be nonviolent. A collection of aesthetic violations and clueless poseur buffoonery. That’s why I haven’t featured the dumbass Chris Brown to date. But I agree, he qualifies for douche status for silly sneaker alone.
The Bleach Baller
Take a good look at this pic, fellow ‘bag hunters and huntresses.
From star-pecs to bling to undie poke to hat tilt, Bleach Baller is uber-rank. The only thing Bleach Baller is missing are hand gestures and kissy lips. But he still deserves to be hen pecked by hens.
Angry, angry hens.
The Samantha Twins are cuddly, curvy perfect balls of hot boobie sliced melon canteloupe fruit cup cocktail sandcastle humping echo hotness.
And that is all there is to say about that one.
God Bless America
Tooly McFratterson may only be a stage-2 Clownbag, but God Bless American boobies.
I stare at them long enough and I see my own future, clouded as it is in ambiguity, existential struggle and paddling her bare bottom with coolwhip and maraschino cherries.
What’s that, Ubiquitous Red Cup? Don’t forget Yellow Bikini Smile Hott?
I will add an extra dollop of chocolate syrup atwixt her shoulder blades, then tussle with an angry wildebeast for her bemusement.
EDIT: Could this be Detroit Lions quarterback Matt Stafford?
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Teddy and Freddy, known about town as the “Scrote Twins,” tried to convince Vanessa that Aussie Rules Football had a ‘simulated masturbation rule,’ which was totally rad.
