Halloween Contest
I’ve been absolutely flooded with some of the most hilarious Hot Chick with Douchebag Halloween combos, and I’m just trying to go through them all right now, so stay tuned for the winner of the contest on Thursday.
I’ll also post a top 10 (20?) Finalists, so everyone can enjoy the absolutely genius creativity at work in these costumes. Just hilarious.
Great work, people. I’m honored and humbled that the spewey/boobies combos of so many HCwDB pics could inspire so many great Halloween getups.
Pooistas
Sadly, this pic is not from Halloween. It is real.
In fact, The remaining members of The Who just got together to cut a new song, The Kids Are All Poo.
Hanna-Barbera is re-releasing their classic kid’s cartoon, Scooby Poo.
Disney is prepping a new summer kids film, Winnie the Poo.
Their favorite Hollywood actress is Lucy Piu.
Every time The Bodyguard plays on HBO, they cry when Whitney Houston sings I Will Always Love Poo.
When they go to the bathroom, they crap.
Watch Closely
You almost got a nottadouche pass in spite of the goofy shirt with Jesus bling shoulder pads and hair fwip, Brad.
Yes you’re mugging sweet, innocent, shoulder suckle worthy Michella. But you don’t seem so bad.
But then you had to go and get a watch the size of Kentucky. And top it off with a thumb-ring chaser.
Sorry bub. Yerradouche.
Licky Douchiano
Ah! I see you are signing your ability to perform acts with a female of fertile disposition, Licky. How clever.
Now let me articulate my response: (hands making the shape of poo)
Blonde’s hypostare just got me to quit smoking. She has the erotic plumage of a tigress on the hunt. I would take her chihuahuas for a walk in Beverly Hills every morning at 5am just for the chance to be cut out of the will by her angry oil baron father, “Shooter.”
VOTE… For DJ Bello
You know what today is?
That’s right. Election Day.
Time to get DJ Bello aka Bobby Batz elected. To Season #22 of The Real World:
Oh yeah, and vote in that other election going on today, too. If you don’t, I’m posting “Frolic Harder” on the main page.
It's DJ Bello, Bitchesssssss
DJ Bello needs no hotts to dance. DJ Bello needs no people to dance. DJ Bello needs only a dystopian post-apocalyptic club wasteland.
And, once there, he will dance like none have danced before.
(warning #1: No hotts in video.)
(Warning #2: Do not click on “frolic harder 2:47” after viewing. HCwDB takes no responsibility for any harm incurred in witnessing that video)
The Blow Pops
That’s right, Cheryl. Get back at your dad by dating an ambulatory billboard.
With a thumb ring.
And the same dragon tatt insignia that’s on the sign for Ho Wops Mandarin Takeout off the interstate, between the Shell Gas Station and the I-Hop.
Shelly's Poor Life Choice
Somewhere, deep within her primordial subconscious, Shelly suddenly senses that she may have made a poor life choice.
The Homies Want Your Vote
The Homies have left the Boutique Lobby and dropped by a house party to work for your vote.
They brought matching chest shaves and hand gestures, and even Ubiquitous Red Cup. Homie #1 even pops the sweat-jacket collar and tackles a Danish Au Pair named Camilla.
But is it enough to win the Weekly?
HCwDB of the Week
The last Weekly before the last Monthly before the 2008 Douchies. My scrotundae is tingling with excitement. Or that could be the Man Junk I just sprayed on it.
Here’s your finalists:
HCwDB of the Week Finalist #1: Brian Earlicker and Lila’s Alzadoes
Props to doucheous scrotimus, who nicknamed this football blocking skeezebag, and to don’t wheeze the douche!, whose run of ‘bag mocking domination continues with nicknaming Lila.
There is little more to add to this toxic swirl of MILFy hottness and creepy ear licking rosarie necklace wearing douche.
You just know this guys begins, and ends, each sentence with “Yo.”
Yo, dig my zebra shorts, yo.
Earlicker made a second appearance in the Friday Haiku, here. And Lila’s enticing bunny tatt, suggests happy trails and soft skin.
Who says you can’t be hot over 35? Lila may not be a spring doe, but she’s a summer deer. Yes, please.
HCwDB of the Week Finalist #2: Fist of Power
Shazam!!
Wonder Douche Power, Activate!!
Never underestimate the short dude with the giant white belt to bust some douche near a Nordic Aryan Model Hott.
Would she spank me with a large rubber paddle for disobeying curfew?
Perhaps she would report me to the Kommandant.
But I would forgive her.
For her hips are strong and crushworthy, and could bear many children with blonde hair and blue eyes.
So I grovel meekly.
HCwDB of the Week Finalist #3: Homies in Da Boutique Hotel Lobby
I simply direct your attention to the fact Homie #1 shaves his armpits.
I repeat.
He shaves his armpits.
Contrast the Homies and their douchey behavior with the pure, innocent snowflake Eurohotts, and you have proper hottie/douchey toxicity.
It goes to eleven.
And Svenga from Belarus brings a second Eurohott to the table in this week’s Weekly.
But, lest I keep babbling, I turn it over to you. Which of these three pics contains enough hott/douche dynamics to earn your vote for the Weekly?
Vote, as always, in the comments thread.
