Thursday, March 17, 2005

Friday Haiku

goddamn they're HUGEHer breasts are quite large,
Just as sure as my name is
Captain Obvious.

The Reverend Chad Kroeger said…
Gets paid to store hams
Since the gyroscope was put
In her Monkey Hole.

The Dude said…
Hark! The Karl Rove twins
Lurk behind Kimye’s tit sling
Like plump fruits of fall.

 

 

Dickie Fingers said…
She was attractive
Until the truck hit her face
hence the new bumpers

Charles Douchewin said…
S(he) bends some gender.
This douchebag is his own bleeth.
DarkSock bends my mind.

Magnum Douche P.I. said…
Should have spent money
on gunt reduction and face
transplant. Gunt I says.

Vin Douchal said…
I once won C-Note
“Biggest Catch” deep sea fishing
Hooked something like this

Ed Hardy Har Har said…
Needs to stop sucking
in air, before she explodes!
Silicon blast zone!

DoucheyWallnuts said…
Her fake Yam Passage
Can accommodate 5 d*cks
Including her own

hermit said…
All week she tends bar
Weekend gigs at kid’s parties
One-woman Bounce House

hermit said…
Lying on her back
She looks a whole lot like the
Sydney Opera House

Wheezer said…
Holy smokes, those BOOBS!
They might be fake, but they’re BOOBS!
Motorboat those BOOBS!

The Reverend Chad Kroeger said…
I think Dark Sock is
Messing with us. Or real bad
Meningitis, Son.

# posted by admin
1:27 am September, 26 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

Gets paid to store hams
Since the gyroscope was put
In her Monkey Hole.

1:28 am September, 26 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

It puts the hams in
Basket, or it gets the hose.
The Ham Boobies hose.

1:31 am September, 26 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

I think Dark Sock is
Messing with us. Or real bad
Meningitis, Son.

2:05 am September, 26 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

Stooooooooooned! Dark Sock performs
His social contract and I
Will end the Stevie.
.

1:02 pm September, 26 The Dude said...

Hark! The Karl Rove twins
Lurk behind Kimye’s tit sling
Like plump fruits of fall.

1:43 pm September, 26 Dickie Fingers said...

She was attractive
Until the truck hit her face
hence the new bumpers

2:08 pm September, 26 Charles Douchewin said...

His breasts are quite large,
Just as sure as my name is
Captain Obvious.
.
.
.
Twofer.

2:10 pm September, 26 Charles Douchewin said...

S(he) bends some gender.
This douchebag is his own bleeth.
DarkSock bends my mind.

2:41 pm September, 26 DoucheyWallnuts said...

Just remember, Bros
Trannies can have fake tits, too
So, must check her trau

3:35 pm September, 26 Magnum Douche P.I. said...

Kumdumpster, lesser
known Kardashian sister.
Less work done than Bruce

3:36 pm September, 26 Magnum Douche P.I. said...

Should have spent money
on gunt reduction and face
transplant. Gunt I says.

3:40 pm September, 26 Magnum Douche P.I. said...

She can tittyfuck
entire Jets defensive
line at the same time

3:40 pm September, 26 Vin Douchal said...

I once won C-Note
“Biggest Catch” deep sea fishing
Hooked something like this

3:42 pm September, 26 Ed Hardy Har Har said...

Needs to stop sucking
in air, before she explodes!
Silicon blast zone!

4:09 pm September, 26 Vin Douchal said...

Got’s no sympathy
For this Bleeth’s nagging back ache
Nor flirts from DoucheBros

4:25 pm September, 26 DoucheyWallnuts said...

Big, fake Yams aside
She looks like she sucks renoB
With gusto and glee

4:26 pm September, 26 Vin Douchal said...

Bitch be pug ugly
And them chest mountains smell like
Stinky hairy ‘pits

4:27 pm September, 26 Vin Douchal said...

Megan can’t tell why
The only guys she attracts
Are field goal kickers

4:28 pm September, 26 DoucheyWallnuts said...

Butter Face Dumpster
Needs full bowl of ice to dip
Her Tranny Balls in

4:30 pm September, 26 DoucheyWallnuts said...

Her fake Yam Passage
Can accommodate 5 dicks
Including her own

4:31 pm September, 26 DoucheyWallnuts said...

There’s no gyroscope
Big enough to fit in her
Monkeyhole abyss

4:32 pm September, 26 hermit said...

All week she tends bar
Weekend gigs at kid’s parties
One-woman Bounce House

4:52 pm September, 26 hermit said...

Lying on her back
She looks a whole lot like the
Sydney Opera House

4:57 pm September, 26 hermit said...

Knock, knock,Who is there?
Emerson. Emerson Who?
Emerson big ones!
.
I’ll be here all week.

5:19 pm September, 26 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

Why for does Dark Sock
Hide Haiku. I have enough
Trouble finding balls.

5:20 pm September, 26 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

Is it wrong to view
The pubescent ass as thing
Of beauty or not?

5:22 pm September, 26 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

I’ma get stoned now. Back
Up over freezing here. Fuck you
Polar bears. Fucccccck You!

6:16 pm September, 26 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

Age old question: Do
The melons match the prolapse?
Or cock? Or cobwebs?

6:17 pm September, 26 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

Elvira, Mistress
Of the Night has offspring. Her?
Name is Smellvira.

7:39 pm September, 26 Wheezer said...

Holy smokes, those BOOBS!
They might be fake, but they’re BOOBS!
Motorboat those BOOBS!

7:40 pm September, 26 Wheezer said...

Condouchius say, “He
who can’t get laid become ‘she’
and get fake boobies.”

7:43 pm September, 26 Wheezer said...

Closer inspection
shows why ‘Sitch’ needed all of
8-point-9 million

12:24 am September, 27 DoucheyWallnuts said...

While her tits are huge
She also has Giant Clam
Giant Clam, I says

2:22 pm September, 27 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

3:52 pm September, 28 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

Thank you DW for that teen image. This may now be the night when I put Mrs. Kroeger’s dismembered body out with the trash.

5:28 pm September, 28 DoucheyWallnuts said...

I’m here for you, my Brother.

11:07 pm September, 28 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

When I was 12 years old, my balls swelled with earth-conquering sperm loads. Ghengis Khan sized, Son. Trim and weed was far and few between. Thirteen brought more outside relief to my nethers and the promise of some peace of mind. When I got too stressed in smell of the days before the bounty, beginning around fourteen, I’d get really stoned and listen to this.
.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=z4UqSsORSuE
.
Then I has fun for 12 years
.
Sometimes when I ponder marrying too early, or only studying hard enough to get the M.A. in economics at a second rate university or two, or quitting the programme and choosing contractor/U.S. Importer (respect) which I flamed out of gloriously 20 years later because of THEY, then being a blood sucking mortgage broker during the run-up I feel less than my 15 year-old self. When that happens, I get really stoooned and listen to this.
.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=z4UqSsORSuE
.
And then I quickly remember that I work in partnership with my wife as a partner, and I have a fat daughter who has no body shame, and I can’t drive, and I go to the 89th ranked MBA programme in the world at 49. Then I get really stooooned and listen to this.
.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=z4UqSsORSuE
.
Then I think. I’m gonna get real stooned and listen to this. And soon look for a tall bridge.
.
And then, I will listen to this.
.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=z4UqSsORSuE.
.
And get really stoooned like now.
.
What happens to who we were?

4:49 pm September, 29 Et Tu Douche? said...

Hey guys come on over,

http://hotchickswithdouchebags.com/blog/2014/09/as-the-nimrod-turns/#comment-169029

12:37 pm September, 30 hermit said...

^Don’t worry Rev. It gets worse when your memory starts failing and you start drooling and shit. Then there’s the
song you don’t hear.
(Anti-Kay Hagan ad was just a happy accident.)

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