Friday, March 25, 2011

Tony Parker: ‘Bag / Nottabag?

NBA something or other Tony Parker, former husband of a desperate housewife, isn’t overtly that douchey.

So I put it to you. ‘Bag? Or Nottabag?

# posted by douchebag1
10:09 am March, 25 Wheezer said...

SpursFan wants to ride him. That is all.

10:10 am March, 25 creature said...

notta…bad ass baller…was stoked for him when he pulled down Eva Longoria, but should be notchin’ as much Texas tail as human limits will tolerate

10:14 am March, 25 Fyodor Dostedouchesky said...

Notta. Not even that many violations as far as I can see in this pic or others I have seen of him, and who wouldn’t trade places with him?

10:14 am March, 25 Dude McCrudeshoes said...

I don’t care. I think the Indo-Brazilian Latina Quartasian with the nice rack and killer flat tummy is looking at me. Seriously. I think she’s into me.

10:26 am March, 25 Dude McCrudeshoes said...

And yeah, if ever the human race is ever completely wiped out, scientists plan to leave instructions to future alien-robot archaeologists to re-populate the planet using Eva Longoria’s DNA. QED.

10:28 am March, 25 Meleki liki Mock-a said...

He’s no Jeff Reed so notta. The guys using his baller status to land high quality tail. Um, wouldn’t you do the same?

10:29 am March, 25 Mr. White said...

Bag. He’s in the NBA. ‘Nuff said.

10:29 am March, 25 jonezy said...

holy shit Wheez- that was funny. That fuckin troll…
.
I think you sort of get a pass for being a total Dbag if you are actually French, no?

10:31 am March, 25 Meleki liki Mock-a said...

@McCrudeshoes, phew, I thought you were gonna say the robot/scientists were gonna use Ke$ha’s DNA.

10:39 am March, 25 Vin Douchal said...

NBA …. snore …
.
However, if Toony Parker takes a turn on Vanessa Hudgens , I’ll be devestated. NSFW link, btw
.
.

10:51 am March, 25 Tanath said...

based on that pic, pass, but there may be others to persuade me otherwise

10:58 am March, 25 Baleen said...

Hey fuckers, I lost my avatar in the Turdpress black hole so I’m not 100% these days. Maybe you’ll be seeing more of me. I’m afraid the virus is rampant here in H-town. I need to step up the mock again. (avatar or not).

-baleen

10:59 am March, 25 Baleen said...

Holy shit! It magically reappeared! Onward Loko’s!

11:01 am March, 25 Dude McCrudeshoes said...

Doesn’t NBA stand for Nothin’ But Assholes? So he may be… but snags a notta pass because it’s in his job description.

@random Hawaiian syllables: Pardon my cultural idiocy, but who is Ke$ha??

11:14 am March, 25 Douchey Lewis and the News said...

Notta. Considering he’s rich, successful, and french; he could be much much worse. He gives me a reason to live… him and those stank-ass hos.

11:17 am March, 25 MC 900 Foot Douchebag said...

I’d give him a DOUCHE because he left Eva, but after seeing and hearing her EVERYWHERE I’d not so sure I wouldn’t have left her too. Reluctant NOTTA.

11:18 am March, 25 MC 900 Foot Douchebag said...

@ Vin….
.
I’ll never get those 3 minutes and 8 seconds of my life back. Damn you, damn you to hell!!!!

11:21 am March, 25 Et Tu Douche? said...

Notta

11:35 am March, 25 Dr. Bunsen HoneyDouche said...

Who fuccen cares? Next.

11:39 am March, 25 Vin Douchal said...

@ Mc
.
I spent a lot longer than 3 minutes looking at Vanessa’s tittie pics …
.

11:48 am March, 25 memphis doucheworkers local 421 said...

He’s sort of a bag, but he’s also European, so he can’t really be expected to know better. I’m leaning with notta.

As someone above pointed out, he’s no Jeff Reed

12:00 pm March, 25 Organic Alpaca Nutrition said...

Not sure if this works in his favor or not, but Tony Parker once bought an antique lampshade made from illegally harvested alpaca foreskins.

12:03 pm March, 25 I R A Darth Aggie said...

Bag, definetly bag. Brothabag, or jockbag, or brothajockbag is up to the scholars.
.
But as proof, I offer that not only did he cheat on Eva Longoria (who may be a bleeth, check out the linked picture), he cheated with Erin Barry, the former wife of Brent Barry, Parker’s former teammate.
.
It’s one thing to cheat on a fine woman like Eva. But it is a violation of Man Law to cheat with a teammate’s spouse. That’s damn near autodouch.

12:16 pm March, 25 apartments for sale said...

I âm afraid the virus is rampant here in H-town. I require to step up the mock again

12:34 pm March, 25 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

I don’t know about him. But Jonezy’s employment offer to head up Kroeger Minstries graphics department has been revoked. Fucking Emo Hulk.

12:48 pm March, 25 Southern Scrotic said...

Hey Baggers,
.
Don’t forget it’s Friday!

1:48 pm March, 25 Hermit said...

@ Reverend K. 12:34,
.
While you’re at it, you might consider firing your marriage counselor, life coach, psychiatrist and pharmacist, it seems they’ve all failed you miserably.

1:55 pm March, 25 Deltus said...

@Vin: you caught me with one of my guilty pleasures. Which is, looking at V.H. Fetching young woman, she is. And yes, I feel like a decrepit old man. I don’t care. My penis knows what it likes. Don’t judge me.

2:03 pm March, 25 dbBen said...

I’m with I. R., maybe he doesn’t have any outward signifiers. But cheating when you’re in a committed relationship, especially married = auto douche.

2:42 pm March, 25 Mr. Bungle said...

Douche. Cheater = Douche. Worst winer/flopper in the NBA = Superdouche.

2:52 pm March, 25 mr.reeve said...

He’s French. Isn’t that autodouche?

3:38 pm March, 25 DoucheyWallnuts said...

reeve beat me to the punch….French = auto.

4:09 pm March, 25 Anthony LaBaglia said...

I personally think the grow a quarter-beard thing is inherently douchey, but I realize a lot of you kids are doin it nowadays… Either shave or don’t. Son.

4:36 pm March, 25 Kevin said...

Nottabag

He’s one of the least douchey players in the NBA.

Not his fault hot baller girls want him (and his millions)

4:46 pm March, 25 Meleki liki Mock-a said...

@Dude McCrude 11:01am, if you don’t know about Ke$ha you’re in a good place. I don’t feel like bringin you down with nonsense knowledge.

5:23 pm March, 25 FoghornLeghorn said...

I was all set to give him a notta, until I clicked the link for the picture of him with the gold basketball. Definitely a douche, despite his fan club.
.
McCrudshoes called it right @10:14 about the Indo-Brazilian Latina Quartasian.

6:05 pm March, 25 Dude McCrudeshoes said...

@Foghorn
Indo-Brazilian Latina Quartasians are an under appreciated demographic. Except by me. I appreciate them enough for about 15 people.

@Mekeki
Unlike you, I’m not too lazy too google. Ke$ha appears to be Bjorn Borg’s specially abled littler brother. I would not hit it.

6:14 pm March, 25 Meleki liki Mock-a said...

@McCrude, Google is for the insecure. But hey, if it makes you feel better to know everything, be my guest. I’m a big fan of smart people. When you learn how to activate your inner Google though, that’s when you’ve really got it made.
.
And what are you talking about Ke$ha is Indo-Brazilian Latina Quartasian. Also she loves baseball.

6:21 pm March, 25 Dude McCrudeshoes said...

^i’m crude, dumb, and hate professional basketball. And deep down, I’m cruder, dumber, and orbiting the 2nd circle of hell.

6:42 pm March, 25 Meleki liki Mock-a said...

@McCrudeshoes, Confession: I used Google to find out what the second circle of hell was. Its not a bad circle to be stuck on if you ask me.
.
And I change my vote to douche for Tony Parker here, I didn’t click on his cheezy in a bad way golden basketball dunk. I don’t think he’s wearing pants either. Also that court doesn’t look regulation.

7:10 pm March, 25 Dude McCrudeshoes said...

^glad you can use google now and again. I’m old enough to remember when Alta Vista was the shit. Let me know when you decide on a screen name. The Schizophrenia is confusing. But I kinda like you against my better judgement.
.
Don’t assume the second circle is all fun and games. We all choose our own hell, one way or another, and I’ve got a fine one going. Now I gotta go find me a glass of Honjiu, as they say in the east.

7:48 pm March, 25 The Dude said...

The French ne donnez pas le merde if married guys have mistresses.

Ce n’est pas un douche. Douche-pas!

Those Spurs gals sure carry a lot on their chests.

8:24 pm March, 25 Grand Douchemeister said...

Notta. Dude’s an athlete and French. The fact he’s not sporting 18 Chinese symbol tattoos while wearing a beret and having a mohawk is evidence.

8:45 pm March, 25 darksouldealer said...

im with anthony…stubble is not a fashion statement…douche…shave it or grow it

8:52 pm March, 25 darksouldealer said...

ps…i think ive said this before but ill say ill again, the ONLY people whove ever done stubble right was/ is hemmingway, bukowski and tom waits…

10:12 pm March, 25 Whoop-Di-Douche said...

Dude is notta douchebag, but he’s worth mocking anyway for other reasons. What kinda turd marries that hot little Eva Longoria and then cheats all over the place on her? A poo-turd, that’s who-what.

11:20 pm March, 25 Steve L. said...

not that douchey compared to other overpaid NBA players.
he is, however, an overpaid NBA player.

12:41 am March, 26 Cheesesock said...

Notta!

6:06 am March, 26 tall guy said...

Well based on that photo I’d go with a notta, but French or not he’s borderline and I’m certain there’s plenty of photographic evidence to support a douche dispute.

9:01 am March, 26 spursfan said...

if he didnt play for spurs id say douche but since he does notta

1:39 pm March, 26 Mockzirra said...

@McCrudeshoes 7:10p, its not Schizophrenia its adaptation and non-conformism. And you know damn well why I do it. My feelings on a screen name are meh. The person I want to talk to already knows its me so other than adding my two cents here and there I have no need to stick to one name anymore. I read or skim all the comments anyways, (even the anons) so I really have no need to stand out from the crowd. But if you have a cool name for me let me know, I’ll throw it into the lineup.

7:42 pm March, 27 Medusa Oblongata said...

Eva is a high-strung, overpaid, self-absorbed twat. She sure did make Tony look like an asshat, running her mouth to the press and blabbing their business, trying to make herself look cute. I’m carrying a pair of load-bearing testicles myself, but I know damn well you don’t talk shit about your man to make yourself look better. Not that it warrants cheating, but when you cut your man’s cock off in 1,000 newspapers, 300 TV shows and the entire internet with a smart-ass remark, you bet your botoxed derrierre there will be a hundred thousand sluts lining up to soothe his ego. Stupid cunt.
.
That being said, I give him a meh. I couldn’t care less about sports, and he’s pretty non-drama, non-bullshit, and no one would even know who he was if he hadn’t married that pig-nosed twit.

2:47 am March, 28 Canadian Drugs Online said...

I feel like a decrepit elderly man. I don’t care. My penis knows what it likes. Don’t judge me.

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