Tuesday, February 7, 2012

Heavy is the Douche That Tatts the Crown

But he is not a King yet.

And before you claim that memorial tatts should be respected, let me remind you that I have buried many a beloved alpaca out by the water vapor farms, and yet I have memorialized none of them in tattoo form.

None that is, except for Shminkles.

For Shminkles was the cutest alpaca of all.

# posted by douchebag1
7:44 am February, 7 Ol' Dirty Douchebag said...

Is he wearing an airbrushed thong? I hate myself for even looking there.

I’m all about Karen on the left even though she has to leave and pickup her kid from pre-k.

7:53 am February, 7 Wedgie said...

I see nothing skinnie in this picture. Two sizable racks, though.

And one mini-boiler growing rapidly from too much alcohol consumption.

8:05 am February, 7 Dude McCrudeshoes said...

No pass for Rest In Peace, though I think it actually says Pest Impeach. We really have to get those rodents out off office.

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Anyway… I’m not fooled by the excuse it’s there “for you to remember”. If that were true, it would read upside down, or in mirror image. Nope. That tatt is for our benefit, and cuz you think it looks good on you. You probably also hope some hotts with more heart than taste think it shows you are a deep soul. But you aren’t. You are Jerz slime, and you really need to do a situp every month or so.

8:12 am February, 7 Et Tu Douche? said...

Chick on the right looks to be all sorts of sloppy, naughty, jiggle fun.

8:13 am February, 7 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

That is the first male gunt I’ve seen in a while, except for when I piss. It is time for him to hike up them drawers to navel standards. Nice chin fung asshole, you look like my retarded brother.

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I’d pop those chicks. But the one on the left is gonna get fat, just sayin. And the one on the right is waiting to exhale. If you look very carefully there is a lithe Mulatto slouching outside the carnival tent.

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Those Mulattos with Madonna were several shades of irrelevant skankdoodle.

8:13 am February, 7 Douchble Helix said...

Never forget The King Of Sears!!

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http://hotchickswithdouchebags.com/2011/01/reader-mail-melissa-went-to-high-school-with-the-starry-blight/

8:17 am February, 7 Douchble Helix said...

JESUS CHRIST LOOK AT THE SIZE OF THAT WATCH!!!

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Joe Pesci/Paulie-from-Rocky hat on chick = auto something.

8:27 am February, 7 Et Tu Douche? said...

^ I meant chick on the left

8:42 am February, 7 army (ret) douche said...

beaten to the king of sears punch

9:28 am February, 7 Nancy Dreuche said...

I too was going to remark on the only true king is the King of Sears. Hail to the Chief. And agree with McCrudeshoes on the actual purpose of the memorial tatts. This is turning out to be an awesome day. We’ve got RevChad on Mullato watch desperately trying to prove he’s not racist. Me on peen watch as per usual. Tall guy on starch bomb alert and jonezy on tranny lust. The rest of you feel free to assign positions as you see fit, you’ve earned some autonomy.

10:14 am February, 7 army (ret) douche said...

real or fake? my bet is left real right fake

10:18 am February, 7 tall guy said...

Also on back-up boobie watch since Kroeger’s doubling w/- future hambeast alert, Dreuche. And chick on left has da boobies. Just sayin’.

10:31 am February, 7 Indiana Choad and the Temple of Douche said...

If it’s alright with you, Nancy, I’ll just sit here and think of all the dirty, dirty things leftie’s willing to do in order to get us to overlook the fact that she’s not model thin.

10:41 am February, 7 Douchble Helix said...

A skinny-moment Belinda Carlisle type in that stupid hat?

10:44 am February, 7 troy tempest said...

The bleeth on the left talks through her nose.

THe bleeth on the right hates herself.

The douche in the middle looks forward to a future stocking vegetables at the Giant Foods out by 7 corners in Falls Church VA.

10:57 am February, 7 Dude McCrudeshoes said...

@Nancy, I’m on Brazilipino Indochinadian watch. But I’ll be disappointed as DB1 posts pic after pic of blonde donut wranglers with asymmetrical bolt on cans.

11:04 am February, 7 The Dude said...

Green stripe rack on the right makes up for all sorts of wrongs in this pic.

11:19 am February, 7 GSR Police said...

DANGER: This image contains toxic visual emissions of douchebag groin shave reveal.

12:18 pm February, 7 Wheezer said...

The only chest tattoo I want to see is my face on their boobies.

12:39 pm February, 7 DarkSock said...

3

2:29 pm February, 7 Magnum Douche P.I. said...

“Rest in Peace” “Dear Friends and Family” So its not even a memorial to one f’ing dead person ? So lame.

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and girl on the left has an awkward smile as she wonders when they can leave this lame Vegas pool and hit the nearest all you can eat buffet. and it better have crab legs !

3:48 pm February, 7 Nostradouchus said...

Groin shave reveal should be illegal for some segments of the population. This is why.

7:14 pm February, 7 Stephanie said...

He’s got that starving child from Africa belly going…and maybe should slow down on the beer and cheeto diet. And dumb hat girl does not like him in the least. Notice the pull away in the photo.

4:21 am February, 9 CB Popped said...

Everyone needs a llama forearm tatt….

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