Friday, October 23, 2015

The Evolution of Hottie/Douchey Cohabit

18005

Hark! Halt!

Put down that greasy/lumpy cig smoking choadtollery cohabit with Sultry Poor Credit Charlotte and listen!

Like Willy Loman, attention must be paid!

Douche with Hott Paradox is now, finally, evolutionarily and Darwinianly explained!

Yes, it all now makes sense.

Chief Dances With Crabs.

Poppa Squatter.

Even this unholy collection of toxic sparrow spittle.

Brazilian Emo Hulk understands. It knew it this entire time.

The answer was simple. The rippling lobsterian torsos of fate are nothing more than the mechanism of deception by which hott is fooled.

I suppose after eight years of this site in its prime, we already knew that. But what the heck. It is good to be reminded once again.

# posted by douchebag1
8:30 pm October, 23 Charles Douchewin said...

I knew the future would bring us awesome ATM machines!

8:53 pm October, 23 The Dude said...

I’ve been staring at her cooch for ten minutes, wondering what Chazzy D meant by ATM machine.

8:54 pm October, 23 Jump Off said...

This site is relevant as ever. Why just the other day I was Live Journaling with a friend on Friendster about it. Fuck the critics Boss, you have always been in the cutting edge of yesterday’s news but with a fresh spin. Chicks dig idiots. Thank god though or else none of y’all would be married. Am I right?

8:56 pm October, 23 Day Drunk said...

So if the talkative guys have the tiniest balls that means it’s time to bang the strong as silent types. I can definitely dig that.

9:04 pm October, 23 Ed Hardy Har Har said...

Brazilian Emo Hulk needs a computer upgrade!

1:50 am October, 24 admin said...

Damn, Boss…I might hafta conscript some o’ these images for further parsing back in the 2005 Fraiku morass… aka More-Ass…
.
DarkSock, aka Inexplicably Dr. Who when posting as Admin….

2:01 am October, 24 DarkSock said...

Memorandum
.
Re: Last week’s Fraiku
.
although there were genius take-downs by RevChad, Charlie D and D. Wallnuts, I had to give this week’s special pear easter egg to enigmatic newcomer (or possible Nancy) “Black Doctor”…
.
See fer yerseff:
.
http://hotchickswithdouchebags.com/blog/2005/05/fraiku-19/

2:02 am October, 24 DarkSock said...

and gimme a brief refractory period so’s I can posit the next Fraikku

2:13 am October, 24 DarkSock said...

May 9th, 2005…Ken and Booby dolls…
.
http://hotchickswithdouchebags.com/blog/2005/05/fraiku-ken-and-boobie-dolls-edition/

3:49 pm October, 24 Angela Marque said...

This is hillarious. When will cute girls finally go for the nice guy? Idk…but at least there are a ton of cute girls to look at on http://www.dailygirlscute.com

10:44 pm October, 24 Jeet Kune Douche said...

UNNGH! I want to pour barbecue sauce on my tongue and baste Charlotte like a rack of lamb.

The slick of petroleum behind Charlotte needs to be chased away with a can of Raid and a cigarette lighter.

7:11 pm October, 25 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

In 1956
I was born. A wet nurse offered
Her nipple. I fucked her ass.

7:29 pm October, 25 hermit said...

One wonders, is that a Visa® or Master(bate)™ card?

7:29 pm October, 25 hermit said...

Or maybe Americunt Express™?

7:30 pm October, 25 hermit said...

“Ma’am, will that be gash or credit?

7:30 pm October, 25 hermit said...

I wonder if it stings a bit when she swipes that card.

7:30 pm October, 25 hermit said...

Her credit score is “poon.”

8:08 pm October, 25 Jeet Kune Douche said...

Her obvious trashiness and poor taste is irrelevant to me. I would be overjoyed if she completely degraded me and then discarded me like a used tampon.

3:06 am October, 26 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MLrC7e3vSv8
.
Hillary Clinton
Is the new Mag Thatcher. God
Bless the children, Sons.

5:15 pm October, 26 Bag em Tag em said...

In the Unholy Toxic Sparrow Spittle photo, I think all of us can collectively say, we feel like the parrot in that photo.

1:31 am October, 27 Vin Douchal said...

She feeds him cigarettes and Mojitos© , he feeds her every line of bullshit ever written in the recorded history of mankind

6:11 pm October, 27 MC900FootDouchebag said...

I like her trashy look despite that disgusting growth on her back.

3:11 pm October, 29 DoucheyWallnuts said...

I’d be all over her like a bulimic on a toilet even if she smelled like Clams Posilippo.

12:54 am October, 30 DarkSock said...

First…allow me to be the first to say DW’s post right above this here one got me a-gigglin’ like Kim Kardashian vaginally impaled by an epileptic piglet.
.
Second…Major Shout Out to savior Doc Bunsen for refilling the HCwDB Fraiku hopper with douche n’ arse… WE LIVE, WE DIE, WE LIVE AGAIN!!!
.
Tertiary – Cap’n James T. D. wins the May 9th 2005 Mock Time Machine in an epic strong mock-throng as he sums up the horror with amazing pathos…you must go here to read it and admire his Globe-Shaped Pear Easter Egg:
.
http://hotchickswithdouchebags.com/blog/2005/05/fraiku-ken-and-boobie-dolls-edition/
.
Sons

1:31 am October, 30 DarkSock said...

Fraiku – May 10 2005…….
.
Bewbs.
.
Step-Children.
.
http://hotchickswithdouchebags.com/blog/2005/05/fraiku-doc-bunsen-commemorative-edition/

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