Friday, December 21, 2012

HCwDB at the Guggenheim in 2023

HaloofAvalonGuggenheim

As many of you know, HCwDB’s crucial role in transforming understandings of art by reclaiming the image through a self-reflexive, post-postmodern rubric will eventually be acknowledged by the academic and literary canon. This will culminate with a triumphant art show at the Guggenheim Museum in 2023.

As a result, I am preparing my yearly collections well in advance of this milestone in post-classical digital art.

By naming each piece of reclaimed imagery as art, I am codifying the destabilization of the signifier in the age of digital reclamation.

Of mechanical reproduction.

Of poo.

Along with July’s “The Halo of Avalon,” my notable artistic works from 2012 include:

“Sheen Face”

“Shminky and the Boob”

“Ganja Crotch”

Desert Strangle Strange”

“Innocent and Poo Face”

“Nematode”

“Friendly Gathering on a Humid Afternoon Plus Four Prong” (a work co-created with Hermit)

“Jack Smellington and His Korner Kameleons” (co-created with DarkSock)

And of course, one of the most significant works of my career, “Uberbro Meltdown and Pear”

Someday the academy will concede my genius. Until then, I’ll go on scratching myself.

# posted by douchebag1
12:33 pm December, 21 Mr. Scrotato Head said...

When you have a mikly white mist spraying from your ball bumper you had the doctor put in way too many stitches after your last episiotomy.

12:40 pm December, 21 Dude McCrudeshoes said...

A worthy collection. The Uberbros and Alice still cause painful fits of phthonos. I’ve become obsessed with the idea that hidden in the image of this cluttered hotel room, or the inexplicably disjointed mirror image, is some cryptic cypher that will explain what is going on here, who Alice is, and what became Alice when the Uberbros bored of posing for pictures and oiled up for some androtropic grappling.

12:44 pm December, 21 Magnum Douche P.I. said...

DB1: Even if the world ended today (which I’m pretty sure didn’t happen) it would still be a good day, with all these awards / reg comments. Can’t stop laughing as I sit in my office and muddle through work on this the pre-holiday weekend . Another fine job my good man.

1:02 pm December, 21 Troy Tempest said...

As I noted earlier this week, I think this one:

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http://hotchickswithdouchebags.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/08/FridayHaiku2.jpeg

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Is worthy of the Guggenheim. It’s as if instead of being a mopey depressive pre-menopausal debbie downer who spends her days looking deep into the abyss of her own miserable existence, Diane Arbus was a instead a coked up 20 nothing bleeth who liked to take pictures of her BFFs down at the club.

1:25 pm December, 21 Dude McCrudeshoes said...

The world may not have ended, but enlightened civilization is probably having it’s last death rattle. My Starbucks barista will be working Christmas day in case I need a caffeinated break from family and friends… but my representatives and president feel free to kick back and enjoy some undeserved time off even if it means taxageddon for the non-elite. Made the mistake of looking at some comments to a news story about a girl disfigured by the taliban… I should have known better. And the solution to guns in schools? Arm some yahoos with guns and put put them in schools, of course.

.

I’m still lighting some candles for Cthulhu’s return. One has to remain positive.

1:33 pm December, 21 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

These dudes wanted to bring their collective awesomeness to the Douchie Parade today to celebrate it’s existence and yearly philosophical posting by DB1 letting us know that great changes and/or the end of HCwDB is imminent. They also give a great shout out to Dark Sock, Et Tu, Vin , DW and the other contributors to this world wide phenomenon and showplace for the obscene, obtuse, and obscure. Son.

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http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CwxyP06ZPu4

1:51 pm December, 21 Wheezer said...

I had some strange urge to click on all of the links in the main post here, and thought it might be a good time to finally take a fork to my eyeballs. But then I said to myself, “Give the visual world one more try.”

.

And then I clicked on Troy’s link…..the fork is once again looking like a wise choice. I’ll be sure to add bleach to it.

1:52 pm December, 21 Dude McCrudeshoes said...

These hotts wish you a trashy Christmas and a fappy New Year:

http://www.lovelyish.com/736904325/5-pieces-of-trashy-christmas-lingerie/

2:03 pm December, 21 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

I like the Halo of Avalon’s real worl d sploogable tummies and such that it is thank the great Chavalo for his Mayan gifts.

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The home bands of this year haven’t seen much action. So here we go. The sploogable SM and the non-sploogeable SLASH ans his old band.

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http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Qb_Uu0eTNWk

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http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oobDQ0vdm8M

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http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ucdnm8iU-5c

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My Sarah McLachlan fetish has been caused by her aesthetic similarity to Mrs. Sarah Kroeger and my favorite hooker also named Sarah who are my two main non shiksas. Son. My Slash fetish is because one time I fucked this chick who liked GNR back in the eighties.

2:14 pm December, 21 DoucheyWallnuts said...

I like Troy’s find. It is like something that miht of happened in the Warhol scene during the 60s, but without the high end folks that Andy used to hang out with.

2:21 pm December, 21 DoucheyWallnuts said...

Sarah Mc whatever the fucc her name is looks like the kind a broad who would yell at me for ordering a large at Starbucks instead of a Venti.

2:31 pm December, 21 hermit said...

Art is subjective but I like Troy’s selection as well for its stark and chilling emptiness. The grim expressions on the faces of the subjects depicts subtle loathing and stomach cramps.

3:40 pm December, 21 Troy Tempest said...

@all – thanks for noticing.

@Hermit – exactly. It’s like these people fucking LIVE FOR FUN, but here they are looking as dour as a fucking scottish graveyard. The guy has this stupid half hearted fwippy hair-don’t, and the woman – fuck – she’s like something out of a Jon Waters movie – too bad Divine died a while ago, he’d have killed himself after seeing her. IT’s just this empty, bleak horror of a scene that mirrors the empty bleak horror in their empty bleak souls. The Halo of Avalon (Above) is all exuberance and stupidity, but at least they’re happy to be there. The Arbus Couple (for want of a better term) are just bored and dull and empty. They’ve spent HOURS getting themselves together for the evening – you would think for all that effort they would be ecstatic and smiling and happy to have their photo taken, but no – Fwippy Boy looks like he practicing his future lobotomy stare and Divine’s Daughter looks like she’s either got really bad cramps or her IBD is acting up again. Either way, they both look like they’d be happier playing hopscotch on the turnpike, which is something they probably should do anyway as it would liberate some extra oxygen for the rest of us.

3:54 pm December, 21 FoghornLeghorn said...

Excellent choices, including Troy’s. Looking through these, I am haunted by the same questions I have after visiting the Contemporary Art wing at the Art Institute. Who does this stuff? Can they make a living by doing it? How can I get involved? And, most importantly, will Mrs. LegHorn be turned on by it?

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I’m partial to “Nematode”, even though I understand she is a starlet.

4:33 pm December, 21 The Dude said...

Troy @ 1.02pm on the last day ever: holy fuck that pic is funny! Doesn’t even need comments

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