Jake Whatupguy says, "What up, Guy?"
Jake Whatupguy gets asked about his strange last name all the time.
Turns out it’s Scotch-Romanian.
Jake Whatupguy says, “What up, Guy?”
Jake Whatupguy gets asked about his strange last name all the time.
Turns out it’s Scotch-Romanian.
A Sherpa Named Tim
Once, when I was busking for trade in the lower mountains of Peakware near outer Uruguay, I met one of the holy Sherpas from the nearby village.
His name was Tim.
“Ted? Can I ask you something?” I asked.
“My name is Tim,” he replied softly, rubbing his wrinkled hands with fish oils gathered from sardines in nearby Lake Recawcawca.
“You should know my name is Tim.” He continued. “For you just typed it earlier in your post.”
“Ted,” I continued. “Tell me why Aqua Teen Boobie Force has shirt stains? Why does the Jerz Guid mug the Aqua Teen Boobie Force?”
“To know the Jerz Guid is to know the self.” Tim replied softly, taking a bite from his trail mix of dried whale cake and plantain.
“Mock. And all will be revealed.”
So I paid Tim off with Conquistador coin. He headed back down the trail. I settled in to enjoy some tasty HoHos and watch the sunset. And realized the Jerz Guid was poo. And must be mocked on the internet accordingly.
Anthony Peedis Writes In
Hipster Douchefus “Pasquale,” aka “Anthony Peedis, aka Your Saturday Facepalm, (and pictured here), writes in:
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STOP HATEN CAUSE, YOU GUYS GET NO PUSSY!!!!
2:18 PM
i must be doing something right if you HATERS are talking about me, its thats just one of my girls i have MANY more…… must suck to me you huh
find something better to do with your time!!! f*cking posers
—-
I happen to know Haten Cause, and he is a fine, upstanding citizen. I would not stop him, and he is welcome in my home any time.
Tim Burton's "Alice in Mandanaland"
“Not so fast, Jack Scrotington!” said Alice.
“Mandanas must be three inches or shorter to ride this ride.”
And because nothing says mad hatter punk rebel quite so much as the Mercedes Benz arm tatt.
Tim Burton’s “Alice in Mandanaland”
“Not so fast, Jack Scrotington!” said Alice.
“Mandanas must be three inches or shorter to ride this ride.”
And because nothing says mad hatter punk rebel quite so much as the Mercedes Benz arm tatt.
Reader Mail: South of the Border 'Bags
Rodriguez writes in:
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Greetings DB1!
Geographically speaking, I live in the ass of Mexico.
Somehow, Ed Hardy douchery has made all it’s way to my hometown, a small city in the Yucatan peninsula. Even though we don’t have a derogatory term for them yet, they seem to be multiplying like wet Gremlins.
Alas, the hott is not what you’d call a hott, but keep in mind this is third world hott we’re talking about. And, if you do post this, they’ll never know. Internet here is for the royal family only.
Greetings and congrats on your website.
– Rodriguez
(p.s. I am Mexican, with a sense of humor and auto-mockery)
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There is a word you can use to describe them, Rodriguez. It’s called “douchebag.”
However, I disagree on the hott factor among Mexican Latina women. Fiery Mexican hott pockets inspire my minute man to want to partake in their border patrols, and my itinerant migrant workers definitely want to examine their produce.
And yes, that last sentence wins the award for worst comedic analogy of the week.
Reader Mail: South of the Border ‘Bags
Rodriguez writes in:
—-
Greetings DB1!
Geographically speaking, I live in the ass of Mexico.
Somehow, Ed Hardy douchery has made all it’s way to my hometown, a small city in the Yucatan peninsula. Even though we don’t have a derogatory term for them yet, they seem to be multiplying like wet Gremlins.
Alas, the hott is not what you’d call a hott, but keep in mind this is third world hott we’re talking about. And, if you do post this, they’ll never know. Internet here is for the royal family only.
Greetings and congrats on your website.
– Rodriguez
(p.s. I am Mexican, with a sense of humor and auto-mockery)
—-
There is a word you can use to describe them, Rodriguez. It’s called “douchebag.”
However, I disagree on the hott factor among Mexican Latina women. Fiery Mexican hott pockets inspire my minute man to want to partake in their border patrols, and my itinerant migrant workers definitely want to examine their produce.
And yes, that last sentence wins the award for worst comedic analogy of the week.
OJ's Imp Son Voted
While we’re going with a Fey Orange Guy theme, here’s OJ’s Imp Son, clearly casting his vote while a number of sexy ladies (and one or two questionable ones) wonder why he isn’t paying them any attention.
Here’s why, ladies. Imp Son has eye issues.
But The Real OJ is having none of it, as he parties with the nice white folks who do not judge him.
OJ’s Imp Son Voted
While we’re going with a Fey Orange Guy theme, here’s OJ’s Imp Son, clearly casting his vote while a number of sexy ladies (and one or two questionable ones) wonder why he isn’t paying them any attention.
Here’s why, ladies. Imp Son has eye issues.
But The Real OJ is having none of it, as he parties with the nice white folks who do not judge him.
