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Tuesday, July 27, 2010
Superlobe
Phatter than a speeding mullet!
More powerful than a Happy Meal prize!
Able to skip annoying job interviews in a single “didn’t set my alarm!”
Look!
Working at the supermarket!
It’s a turd!
It’s a lame!
It’s Superlobe!
Yes, it’s Superlobe – lame visitor from next door suburbia who came to bother Sweet Suzy Hott with powers and piercings far beyond those of normal men.
Superlobe – who can change the course of bagging groceries at the local Albertsons, air guitar with his bare hands, and who, disguised as “Continuing Education and Part Time Guitarist Guy,” mild mannered guy for a great metropolitan supermarket, fights the never ending battle for minimum wage, Smirnoff Ice and the slacker way.
Tuesday, July 27, 2010Reader Mail: Snooki Rings the Stock Bell, Pete Gives Up
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DB1, SIR!!!
I am no longer able to faithfully execute my duties in service to The War Against Taints on our Society. I must respectfully step down and relinquish my duties.
I know some might say that i’m taking the coward’s way out, but i happen to disagree. Isn’t there something to be said for letting a society that elevates the spectacle of self indulgence — to a point that it gives them complete control over the huddled masses — collapse into oblivion and the annals of history?
Surely at some point during the collapse of the roman empire, someone somewhere took a look at their society and thought to themselves, “You know this is pretty messed up. Not worth saving. F@ck it!”
Well, today that person is me.
I can carry on this battle no longer. I shall go commit hari kari using Four Prong, and shuffle off this mortal coil. I wish you the best, but i know at this point the battle is for naught.
Godspeed.
– Pete
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Was it over when the Jerseyites Jagerbombed Long Island Harbor?
Never say die, Pete. Never give up mocking.
Tuesday, July 27, 2010A Quorum Vote Has Been Called: Elizabeth for “Hall of Hott”
‘Bag Hunters have successfully petitioned for a cloture vote via quorum on the nomination of Elizabeth for a lifetime appointment to our hallowed Hall of Hott.
All may vote, with weighted votes going to those members of the Hall of Mock.
First appearing last week in Larry the Claims Processor Holds on to 45 For As Long as He Can, ambiguously Quartasian Elizabeth offers a body of pure suckle drink hott water splashing on a crest of mountain boobie ice cream rainbow humper pooper.
She is tasty, and clean, and pure like snowflakes, no one could ever stain.
But tasty enough to make our hallowed Hall of Hott?
What’s your vote?
Tuesday, July 27, 2010A Quorum Vote Has Been Called: Elizabeth for "Hall of Hott"
‘Bag Hunters have successfully petitioned for a cloture vote via quorum on the nomination of Elizabeth for a lifetime appointment to our hallowed Hall of Hott.
All may vote, with weighted votes going to those members of the Hall of Mock.
First appearing last week in Larry the Claims Processor Holds on to 45 For As Long as He Can, ambiguously Quartasian Elizabeth offers a body of pure suckle drink hott water splashing on a crest of mountain boobie ice cream rainbow humper pooper.
She is tasty, and clean, and pure like snowflakes, no one could ever stain.
But tasty enough to make our hallowed Hall of Hott?
What’s your vote?
Tuesday, July 27, 2010Starhawk Demands Satisfaction
Although, staring at their glasses, I’m pretty sure I defeated that level at Tron back in 1984.
Don’t think that’s Quartasian Ann, so chalk up a third quality hottie as Starhawk makes his run at the Weekly, even if she’s Bleethy as hell.
Monday, July 26, 2010“Beer Ho!”
“Beer Ho!” shouted the sailor atop the bar stool as he gazed into yonder eve.
“Nah, she gives it up for free.” Responded the bartender.
Yup. No idea what I’m writing.
But I do know this.
Ed Hardy belt buckle = Sign #27 of the Impending Douchepocalypse.
Monday, July 26, 2010"Beer Ho!"
“Beer Ho!” shouted the sailor atop the bar stool as he gazed into yonder eve.
“Nah, she gives it up for free.” Responded the bartender.
Yup. No idea what I’m writing.
But I do know this.
Ed Hardy belt buckle = Sign #27 of the Impending Douchepocalypse.
Monday, July 26, 2010Hector “Macho” ItchCrotcho
Rosary beads in the pool makes the Baby Jebus talcum his pooter.
Monday, July 26, 2010Hector "Macho" ItchCrotcho
Rosary beads in the pool makes the Baby Jebus talcum his pooter.
Monday, July 26, 2010Personal Space Paulie Voted
Personal Space Paulie took a moment out of annoying Katerina at the Iowa State Fair Summer Formal to vote in the HCwDB of the Week.
Have you voted yet?
