Hot Chicks With Douche Bags

Friday Haiku

These choads ask the girls:

“So, What can Brown do for you?”;

Bring Small Packages…

Two giggle hotts laugh

and slip through the douche gauntlet

The bags don’t notice.

— Bilbo Douchebaggins

Wandered over from

apartments next door, to bitch

about the poo smell

— FredN.

Black-briefed Bob ponders

Age old question. “What happened

to my freakin’ nads?”

— Franklyn DealorNo Doucheifelt

Astronauts return

Successful orbiting the sun

now smell like poo

— Anonymous

Is this the way to

Trader Joe’s? she asks and laughs

shopping list: raisins

— FredN.

Ann giggles with Jane.

They got a bag o’ butt plugs.

Sold as ‘Ass Toners’.

— Franklyn DealorNo Doucheifelt

It has been until

Now a myth. The myth of the

Sewer line stippers.

— The Reverend Chad Kroeger

Crowd Happy

Fukushima Clean Up Crew

Home Safe and Sound

— Masterfellini

“I hate Tom Hardy”

cry the rejected actors

for the role of Bane

— Douche Wayne

Chester and Lana Pose for a Self Portrait Using a Bathroom Mirror

Bustiers and Aqua Shirts suggest they are attending an academic conference on post-Derridean deconstruction in the reconfiguration of global praxis.

Either that, or the $4.99 hot wings all-you-can-eat special at Surfer’s Delight off of Pico.

The Jersey Top Hat Bros Take a Break

After performing at the Radisson off Exit 13W, the Jersey Top Hat Bros decided to mix it up with Kelly and Latisha from the nearby “Cheetahs Free Buffet On Thursdays” revue.

Because hey, when you don’t have culture or intellect, ya gotta find some way to pass the time.

Where's Waldouche: Roastyhead Paid-to-Abs Edition

Somewhere in this lineup of toned but perhaps a tad second-tier paid-to-poser pooch slobbers (exept for you, Quality Mandy), I’ve carefully hidden a Roastyhead.

Look closely.

Can you find him?

Kisseus Vomitorious Makes His Move

And by move, I mean Jesus chew.

Mandarin Orange Comes to Jesus

Mandarin Orange.

Still out there.

Still bothering second tier vaguely manish Kardashian sisters with Jesus bling and skin cancer.

"In the Realm of the Furry Senses"

There shall be only one.

Caption This Pic

“As Mama Selena liked to tell her friends in Boca, her son, Lil’ Pepe, likes ’em tall, voluptuous, and with prodigious ham dangle ™.”

The Long Journey of Stupid Red Triangle Head, his Sidekick Dieter Von Crappybeer, and Kelly

What began in an orphanage in Timbuk3, lived through much of the turmoil of the great Kardashian Glute Wars of the late 2009s, and ended in a rickshaw in outer Reno, is a sad tale of woe, wood grain alcohol, and a cute schnauzer named Peppy.

Yup.

I got no ideas what I’m saying.

My last day in NYC as a semi-resident. I shed a salty fuccen tear, and munch on a bagel.