Friday Haiku
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Friday, July 23, 2010
Friday Haiku
Thursday’s Starry Blight,
Has gone Supernova Poo,
A Red Dwarf of taint.
Professor Neckbeads
Will not be deterred, no no
Will bang somebody
— saulgoode42
Somewhere in Japan
The original Hello
Kitty prays for death.
— Mr. White
On the count of three
Everyone give me their best
Anal rape grimace.
— Crucial Head
Standard template for
greased beaded double Big Mac
McDonalds sandwich.
— Bag Margera
If this is indeed
An Encore as cups suggest,
Glad I missed the show
— the douche is alright
Air is thick with haze
from bodyspray and B.O.
Do I smell tuna?
— Bagnonymous
Poolside in Vegas
Five friends live large. They’d better.
Break’s over in ten.
— Mr. Scrotato Head
Friday, July 16, 2010Friday Haiku
Inscriptions on face,
Tell where the gold is buried,
Hint: “No fault divorce.”
Tattoos on his face
Signify his gangster ties
With MS-Turdy.
— Crucial Head
The plain white t-shirt
offsets Affliction body;
his ass is tapped out.
— Wheezer
Instinct takes over
As Duane humps Steff’s dress that looks
like mom’s couch cushion
— Mr. Scrotato Head
Jawa on on left cheek
Searches face for scrap metal…
Build droid to kill him.
— Boatbutter
Rorshach nuzzles up
Kimmy smiles uncomfortably
sees a bad pattern.
– Mr. Biggs
Sandy smells so good
Puddy Holly’s getting wood
Do better, she could
— saulgoode42
Prison G.E.D.
Teacher’s pet has a huge crush
Not a shot in hell
— Vin Douchal
Even this dude’s poop
Is bedazzled with
White Corn Hieroglyphs
— DarkSock
grandma’s wallpaper
disguises pointy funbags
anal bead necktie
— paperorplastic
Friday, July 9, 2010Friday Haiku
Sproing-hair, like space schlong.
Melvin’s wild years soon past.
But boobies abide.
This yeasty cod piece
Symbolic superstar scrote
Reluctant hots pose
— The Baggernaut
Murton in new sect
“hari hari krishna krishna poo”
armadillo ass
— Creature
Cormac McCarthy
Time to send Judge Holden in
To take a douche scalp
— Vin Douchal
Leopard hott needs to
declare independence from
the Red, White and Douche
— dknutty
Steve’s joke is pure corn
He ain’t no Texas Longhorn
But are his gals shorn?
— saulgoode42
Blonde Trisha consoles.
Boobies speak of brighter morn’s.
And navel concurs.
— Amerigo Vesdouchey
Mohawk Melvin mugs
Milf mammaries. Mexico
Mulls mass migration
— Mr. Scrotato Head
Red neck’s mohawk flag
Surrounded by two hots
I smell Skoals & Budweiser
— mr.reeve
In San Antone, they’ll
Remember the Alamo
by shaving his head.
— Wheezer
Friday, June 25, 2010Friday Haiku
Vegas ‘Bag Sandwich,
One slice greasy. One moldy.
But mmm… squish filling.
illustrated man
is a print shop tragedy
hott has big fake cans
— creature
Squish filling is bleeth
But I would gnaw uponst thigh
Like famished Daschund.
— Crucial Head
Ed Hardy shirt stretched
far beyond capacity
looks like a tattoo
– Hot Buttered Poopcorn
Lepper Messiah
Gathers flock for his sermon
On STD Love.
— Crucial Head
ron darling douche on
left ,temp notta expired
for beating the sox
— Euripidouche
Samurai Scrote feigns
inked torso disguise in place
of suit and necktie.
— Whoop-di-douche
researchers have found
diabetic tattoo ink
reacts with stupid
— the ‘bag apple
I want a skull, and
A star, and flowers, nice boobs
Oh, and a clock, and…
— Mr. Scrotato Head
She should buy a new
bikini instead of just
patching the old one.
— Mr. White
Just because your friend
is horrid, doesn’t downplay
your bag hand gesture.
– Bag Margera
Mole tatt in black hair
quite realistic: skull choad
should avoid the sun.
— WheezerHCwDB
The clock on naval
Says its time to get a life
Still putting it off
— Vin Douchal
Even though he’s dead
Sinatra would have him killed
For wearing that hat
— Snoop Douchey Douche
Friday, June 18, 2010Friday Haiku
Crazed Party at Dave’s!
Blue Bandana Bros pound Schlitz,
Mack on Ralphie’s sisters.
Animal print girls:
Welcome to the monkey house.
Natty Ice in fridge.
— massengill
Front girl is guarding
her purse from the spiky pud
thieving her tampons.
— Bag Margera
Angelo wonders:
If he squeezes hard enough
Make one good person?
— saulgoode42
Like unwanted blast
Vuvuzela to ear drum
Our day is ruined
— Vin Douchal
Drunk choadwank in back
Assumes crucifixion pose
Who will oblige him?
— The Motley Douche
Axe booze and smokes
Eight guidos in stinky heat
Italy in shame
— The Reverend Chad Kroeger
High school grad party
Die hards. Too bad lawn darts are
now made from plastic.
— Mr. Scrotato Head
The bros are paired off,
hair not the only “blowouts”
they’re gellin’ tonight.
— WheezerHCwDB
Thanks to DB1,
I count syllables in all
my Friday emails.
— Bagnonymous
Friday, June 11, 2010Friday Haiku
Brothabag Damon knows
How to score with drunk bridesmaids,
Perfume the chin fung.
laughs at this guy, says “No game.”
Chin pubage lacking.
— Wheezer
Lamisha Johnson
Just got off her welder’s shift
I’d flip the bird, too.
— Franklyn DealorNo Doucheifelt
Bespeckled genius
Age IQ or douche boy friends
Princess chokes her chicken
— Claude Douchenburg
dovetail-joint chin pubes,
attract royal admirer,
and “sausage fingers”.
— Colossus of Choads
Bling Crosby knows that
In order to claim boobies
Must first ditch fat wife
— saulgoode42
In Utah, Damon
can take advantage of lax
societal rules.
— Dr. Bunsen Honeydouche
Jiffy Lube is closed,
Brothabag Damon parties.
Spends seven month’s pay.
— Amerigo Vesdouchey
Friday, June 4, 2010Friday Haiku
Choad licks, Hardy Kills.
Hark! Lynn’s marshmallow hot bod,
Like razed sideburns, waste.
Like a daddy bird
He prepares to feed her lunch…
Last night’s spaghetti
— Wedgie
UNLV Chi’s
Car Wash fundraiser seconds
as job fair for bro’s.
— Wheezer
Where is the Hand of
Collective Conscious? Please press
“Emergency Stop”
— boatbutter
Aroma of turds
Wafts through restroom stalls whereby
STD’s are spread.
— Crucial Head
Dodgers to seek new
promotion give away night.
Buy one get one choad.
— Dr. Bunsen Honeydouche
Sex in a bathroom
The ultimate adventure
For pinheads with tats
— saulgoode42
pass the olive pitt
use of hands is not allowed
hott hides one in bra
— creature
Tiny man nipples.
Even Greg Focker couldn’t
milk those little guys.
– End the Haberdouchery
Friday, May 28, 2010Friday Haiku
Cheap flight to Cancun,
Ken’s shades “blu-block” poverty,
Angie’s tortadas: perky.
Now I know why its
called Montezuma’s revenge.
Grieco virus breeds.
— Dr. Bunsen HoneyDouche
Mexican rulers
Considering a big fence
To keep out the douche
— Bagnonymous
Make love, not war BOOBS
Tune in, turn on, drop out BOOBS
Groovy, far out BOOBS
— Wheezer
His giant wrist watch
Solemnly reminds me that
It’s time to get ill.
— Crucial Head
American spunk
Fleshing out a peace agreement
Ernesto says no
— saulgoode42
Its Jamacian Day
Lake Elsinore bombarded
With 4:20 Douche
— Vin Douchal
Friday, May 14, 2010Friday Haiku
I’ve seen this movie,
Harry Lime in “The Third Douche.”
While Beth wears Shrek wipe.
Green scrotumtroll poo
Leaves trail of spray tan on hot
Morn soiled rib fruit
— The Baggernaut
What Troll bag doesn’t
Know, is that you must be this
Tall to ride Ms Beth.
— Dicy
Green Giant butt Q-Tip
tells hott if bear ask does poo
stick to skin, say no!
— creature
For just one dollar
You too can crap on a hott
But there’s a troll bridge
— Ex Douche Machina
David Littleman’s gap
not all that galls and chafes her;
Stupid people trick.
— Wheezer
I would sniff the hell
out of that tank top just to
be close to her chest.
— Bagnonymous
Nancy wears results
Of feeding her horse Taco
Bell’s new Tortada.
— Amerigo Vesdouchey
Friday, May 7, 2010Friday Haiku
Theater club tryouts,
Audition for Glee Club fail.
Janets boobs sing on.
oh Catholic douche
areolae are ignored
so penance is due
— Colossus of Choads
Marcus tries to stand
But gravity field near boobs
Slowly pulls him in
— Mr. White
Swiss Alps inviting,
Dieter stays behind his Wall,
longs for a bratwurst
— Wheezer
Glandular chest puffs
Milky orbs of boob delight
30 PSI
— Vin Douchal
Ben struggles to walk
with his elephantitis
As Jen laughs at size
— Franklyn DealorNo Doucheifelt
Douchie drinks Grey Goose
Janets jublees in danger
vomit eminent
— Scrotediddilyumptious
Fleshy milkmakers.
Jan’s boobs give rise to nethers.
Gravy boat betwixt.
— Amerigo Vesdouchey
